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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To possibly kill my DH if there is no gift under that bloody tree

35 replies

cleofatra · 23/12/2013 21:50

I have been asking dh for months about ds gift from us. We give the "big" gift from us and the bits from Father Xmas. No response, "i dunno", "I'll let you know". Also negative responses to my suggestions

Well, it is Xmas eve here where we are.

Yesterday, after having done all the gifts, I popped into a store between shopping, (he was in the car), and bought DS a ds 3 d xl. Whilst at the checkout, one from being served tbh, DH came into the store and made a bit of a scene about how he didnt approve of it as he wants ds to be more active etc and told me to take it back to where I got it. DH has an obsession against gaming and electronic for kids and I did know that. It was just so easy. It was there, it was done.

Now this was a tad embarrasing but I did take it back to the shelf.

So, I had ds gift there in my hot little hand and now we are giftless again. He claims he will "have a look" today and is after a bike. He even said he may get it a day or so after Xmas. To which, I flipped.

If there is no gift under that bloody tree I may kill him.

OP posts:
AnnabelleLee · 23/12/2013 21:51

Kill him? Why haven't you done something about it for yourself?

Original poster
cleofatra · 23/12/2013 21:53

I have bought every single gift, this is the only one and he wants to make a decision about this one from "us".

OP posts:
Original poster
cleofatra · 23/12/2013 21:54

I should clarify, ds has lots of gifts that will be there, from Fr Xmas. Its just the one "from us".

OP posts:
LizzieVereker · 23/12/2013 21:55

If he wants DS to be more active, is he going to be more active with him? Or is he going to watch you go out for bike rides, take him to sports practices, matches etc?

NatashaBee · 23/12/2013 21:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

fedup21 · 23/12/2013 21:55

How old is your DS?

shoofly · 23/12/2013 21:56

Just kill him now the man is clearly a dickhead. I hope he's not banging on the door when the staff are trying to knock off to get home to their families

CandyCanesWhipsandChains · 23/12/2013 21:56

He told you to put it back !!!!

Original poster
cleofatra · 23/12/2013 21:57

He is 9, plenty without the one from "us" and he has today to get this bike.
lizzievereker I think you may know us lol spot on

OP posts:
ToffeeOwnsTheSausage · 23/12/2013 21:59

Is he always so bossy and controlling?

I can't believe people really do leave shopping for their child's present until the day before Christmas Eve.

nickeldonkeyonadustyroad · 23/12/2013 22:00

annabelle she clearly stated in her op that she has not only bought all the presents for ds herselc, but also chose skmethjng appropriate that was Refused by her dh and made to put back.
and then her dh said he would get the main gift

LizzieVereker · 23/12/2013 22:00

Never mind, you can come out cycling with me and my DSs. Thanks Both of whom have also had gadgetry from an unfashionably young age, and seem to be sociable/able to read/ not psychotic!

nickeldonkeyonadustyroad · 23/12/2013 22:02

he won't get a bike tomorrow.
I know that a lot of bike shops have to get bikes ready and that can take a whole day.

Original poster
cleofatra · 23/12/2013 22:04

toffee I have quite a lot going on here. I have no vehicle, I work 2 days a week, have a visitor from abroad staying with us and the kids have been on school holidays since end of november. I also have just had to spend 3 days trying to get an assessment on an elderly relative who we found in a terrible state. Also spent the days cleaning her house (waist deep in crap).

Things happen, time gets away

OP posts:
WhoNickedMyName · 23/12/2013 22:04

He "told you" to put it back. And you did? Wow.

Good luck to him, trying to find a suitable bike on Christmas eve.

Original poster
cleofatra · 23/12/2013 22:04

I may just go back and get the blasted ds :p

OP posts:
LizzieVereker · 23/12/2013 22:05

Ps: in case that sounded like a stealth "get me, I'm a super sporty Mum" boast, I'm really not! Cycling involves lots of wobbling (DS2), kindly slowing down so as to not show the rest of us up (DS1), getting a bit jelly legged (me), and a big hot chocolate and marshmallows half way round (everyone).

Original poster
cleofatra · 23/12/2013 22:05

whonickedmyname I think I was just so mortified, I just did it.

OP posts:
TheDoctrineOfSanta · 23/12/2013 22:06

Get the DS, OP, take it back after Xmas if he gets the bike sorted tomorrow.

Original poster
cleofatra · 23/12/2013 22:07

I think I will do that thedoctrineofsanta .

OP posts:
ZeViteVitchofCwismas · 23/12/2013 22:09

well money saving expert said hand the child a gift voucher of what they will get and why you are waiting and that they will get an extra gift because of the money you saved and also learn an important lesson in life....Xmas Smile, so you are giving him three gifts

Xmas Grin
HyvaPaiva · 23/12/2013 22:09

Of course you should go back and get it, I'm glad you might.

I can't believe he told you to do something and you felt you should. That's not great, OP. You're equal. Your decision was absolutely fine and good. He has no right whatsoever to have that upper hand. You keep saying 'it's "from us"'. I see no us in this, just him controlling you and neglecting to buy his child's present til Christmas Eve. He doesn't sound great and I hope this isn't his default behaviour.

RomulanBattleBagel · 23/12/2013 22:10

Get it and keep it in case numpty DH doesn't manage to get something!

Why did he insist on making the decision when he clearly wasn't making any effort to actually, you know, make the decision Hmm

Original poster
cleofatra · 23/12/2013 22:11

I must admit, I can't even believe I put it back myself!

OP posts:
ToffeeOwnsTheSausage · 23/12/2013 22:11

I wasn't meaning YOU have left everything. Clearly I was talking about HIM since he has. Is he always so controlling?