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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Where do people get the money?

189 replies

MrsLouisTheroux · 21/12/2013 17:10

I understand that there are people (I thought the minority) who earn a zillion pounds and are very high earners but I just don't understand how so many people afford to eat out, shop, go to the cinema/theatre so often. The huge shopping centre near me is always literally packed with people doing just that. Not just at this time of year either.
The shops seem to be doing brilliantly but I don't know where the money comes from.
DH and I earn a good amount between us and we do nice stuff but can't afford to eat out, shop or go to the cinema more than a couple of times a month and we don't buy a lot when we do go shopping - certainly not for designer stuff.
I thought there was a recession?!
AIBU to wonder how people afford it?

OP posts:
Original poster
MrsLouisTheroux · 21/12/2013 17:30

Armadillo: The point is, when people say to me "oh I couldn't afford that"/"how do you afford that", i'm thinking the same about their car, the holidays they go on, regular haircuts and loads of other stuff.
You are spot on I think! I think I need to look at our outgoings and cut out certain things. It is about priorities you are right!

Monet Hmm

OP posts:
LynetteScavo · 21/12/2013 17:31

Anyway, I'm not eating out or going to the cinema every fortnight - and I don't know many other people who do either.

LynetteScavo · 21/12/2013 17:32

Mind you, pre-DC I was always eating out, shopping, etc, etc.

Those were the days.....

Original poster
MrsLouisTheroux · 21/12/2013 17:37

mer74:Because there really is a crowd of people in the UK who can afford a lot of the luxury goods being sold, but there's even more who think they can afford it, but really can't.
I think that too. Every time I phone the bank to transfer money they ask me if I need to increase my borrowing.They have told me that I can have up to 25K I want it. Hmm No thanks.

OP posts:
zeeboo · 21/12/2013 17:41

For me,Thearmadillo has it spot on. DH and I both work and don't have a great deal of money but we love gadgets, all free on affordable monthly contracts, a big tv; massively reduced in currys sale and eating out/takeaways so people may think we are very wealthy or wasting money. But, like the armadillo, we don't buy clothes unless they wear out and then from supermarkets or eBay/Primark etc. We've never holidayed abroad, get our hair cuts for £10 from a mate, I don't wear makeup, we don't drink or go out socially, run one cheap car quite conservatively and don't spend money on redecorating and homewares.
By contrast my best mate who earns double what we do, has a small tv, fewer gadgets and almost never eats out or gets takeaways but has 1-4 holidays/short breaks a year and gets her hair done by a proper hairdresser and pays for a lot of music lessons etc for her kids.
Oh and I do go to the cinema a lot these days as I have the Cineworld unlimited card, £15 a month for as many movies as you like. I go with two friends who also have the cards. As most films are £9 each I could never afford it but for the card.

MrsDavidBowie · 21/12/2013 17:43

I use a credit card wisely....I put everything on it each month, earn my John Lewis points, and pay off in full every month. And get JL vouchers too.
We have no mortgage thank god so are lucky to have quite a lot of disposable income.

MoreBeta · 21/12/2013 17:43

GodRest - I'm like you. I pay off the card at end of month and budget but not everyone does. People I know on really high salaries are paying minimum on credit card each month.

Its what the Bank of England and Government want us all to do. Borrow and spend in the shops to get the economy moving.

Riiiiight.... that plan worked of so well last time we tried it.

mer74 · 21/12/2013 17:44

MrsLouisTheroux - I think it's part of the rise in celeb culture - I know that maybe sounds a bit OTT, but children are raised being told "they deserve X", or treated like little Princes, and that no child is unworthy of getting the "best" (education, brand name goods), every child can do whatever he or she wants to do, no barriers, every child is a snowflake.

It's then very hard when you get to late teens, twenties for someone to turn around and realise "hey, you know what, I've slogged my guts out in a physically demanding shelf stacking job for 40 hours this week, but I can't even afford that thing I really like the look of in a shop as I walk home" - we raise expectations so high.

I'm not saying we shouldn't raise people's aspirations, but I fear we aren't setting realistic expectations at all (especially as the real growth in economies is moving from west to east, and is set to continue - no easy solutions for the younger generations today here).

It's no surprise to me that Wonga/etc are booming in the last few years.

noisytoys · 21/12/2013 17:50

Credit. Then the credit streams suddenly stop and they are plunged into poverty and can't afford the repayments.

Guitargirl · 21/12/2013 17:50

Everyone has different priorities don't they and spend their money differently. I expect very few people (apart from the seriously wealthy) spend lavishly in every area of their life. The people you see in shopping centres could be doing their one big splash out for the year. Or they could just be hanging out, especially the groups of teens.

I spend a lot on days out for the DCs, extra-curricular activities and Christmas/birthday parties, etc. But our family holiday costs about a fifth of what I know our friends spend on going away, I can't remember the last time I bought myself anything to wear and we don't have a car.

eurochick · 21/12/2013 17:50

I get what you are saying, OP. According to those salary survey thingies the newspapers run every so often, our household income is in the top 1% nationally. But often when we think we will have a blow out meal, treat ourselves to an extravagant holiday or whatever, we think twice based on the price and then find out its sold out anyway! Who are all these people who can afford £100 a head restaurant bills or 5* holidays?

LynetteScavo · 21/12/2013 17:52

Who are all these people who can afford £100 a head restaurant bills or 5 holidays?*

They are people who have already paid off their mortgage. I would be laughing if I had an extra 12K a year.

youarewinning · 21/12/2013 17:54

Great post armadillo it's made me think differently as well.

TalkinPeace · 21/12/2013 17:58

I love my credit card.
This months bill is in front of me ..... £2821.58
I've paid no interest on it for over 5 years
because I understand how bankers get rich

and that is why I wrote the spreadsheets on this thread
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_money_matters/1715581-Cost-of-credit-cards-and-mortgages-the-spreadsheets

Mabelandrose · 21/12/2013 18:00

There are lots of young-ish couples out there with no children, good jobs and a large amount of disposal income each month.

purplebubbles · 21/12/2013 18:06

We eat out and go to the theatre and cinema a lot but we only have one child so it's a lot more affordable. He's a teenager and isn't interested in extracurricular activities/sports so it's one of the main things we do as a family. Also theatre and cinema are specific interests of mine (I work in the arts) so it's not just entertainment for me, but keeps me up to date with my field.

We only use credit cards for the additional credit protection for big purchases but we pay it off each month, most spending goes on the debit card. We spend a lot less money than many other families in other ways, e.g. no car, small flat so lower energy/maintenance bills, no childcare.

bebbeau · 21/12/2013 18:21

interesting thread.

i often wonder about this, everyones meant to be skint yet where i live the town centres and horrific out of town shopping centres are rammed all the time, and not just weekends they are mega busy in the week as well Confused

cantheyseeme · 21/12/2013 18:31

When not accounting for xmad and big things i go to a big place about an hour away maybe once a month on the wages ive left, i buy clothes and things we need but it might seeem im spending lots altgough im not as i dont do it very often.

pianodoodle · 21/12/2013 18:37

There were plenty of people in The Whole Foods Market today filling trolleys Shock

There's plenty of money around here it seems - just not in our house.

We were only there to snaffle the free samples Grin

whatiswrongwithyou · 21/12/2013 18:43

Wait until the interest rates rise, think it might be a very different picture then.

TalkinPeace · 21/12/2013 18:50

whatiswrongwithyou
Wait until the interest rates rise, think it might be a very different picture then.
which is exactly why they wont.

Credit cards charge average APR of 17% (ie 34 times base rate)
Mortgages are running at 4% (ie 8 times base rate)

if base rates rose to over 3% the number of houses that would be repossessed would be catastrophic - so they will not rise above 3% for another few years.

Creamycoolerwithcream · 21/12/2013 18:52

My DH retrained in a lucrative field, moved 100s of miles from family and friends and works 60 hour weeks so he can treat the family to nice meals, shopping trips, lots of days out and holidays with disposable income.

Original poster
MrsLouisTheroux · 21/12/2013 18:57

The answers on this thread have actually made me remember my own situation when DH and I were younger! We were child free, lived in a tiny rented (furnished) flat and we earned more money than we do now!

We were probably the people I am talking about in my OP!
We had a lot of disposable income! At one point, we saved 2K PM to get the deposit for our house and still hit the town... How times change!

Buying our house, maintaining it, decorating it, paying for childcare etc. has cost a lot of money over the years!

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minifingers · 21/12/2013 18:58

2 people on not massive wages (say 35k each), in social housing, or with a tiny mortgage... I know quite a few people like this. They have money to spare. 70k household income - there are many families with this sort of money coming in.

Original poster
MrsLouisTheroux · 21/12/2013 19:01

Do people with a combined wage of 70K live in social housing though mini ?! I agree about those with a tiny mortgage though!

OP posts: