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Original poster

To ask if there is a point of no return re: weight loss

50 replies

PlusSizeHorror · 21/12/2013 11:50

I am so disappointed and disgusted with myself and the state I am in. I am 5'6.5 and 180 lbs and size 16 (12 stone 12, 81.6 kg) Sad

I am borderline obese and I want to do something about it, I'm just turned 20 and I don't want to spend my youth fat.

But after some comments from my mother, I want to ask can someone be too fat to lose weight?

Also what is a reasonable time frame to lose 3 stone. 6 months?

OP posts:
MrsLouisTheroux · 21/12/2013 11:54

Well, you are the same height as me and 4 stone lighter!
YABVu to think you have reached the point of no return! You can lose weight and yor mother is rude.

MrsLouisTheroux · 21/12/2013 11:55

6 months to lose 3 stone is a good plan. I did this (it's back on now though !) very doable! Good luck!

BerryChristmas · 21/12/2013 11:56

Well you weigh the same as me.......and I'm 5'2" ! I don't feel disgusted with myself.......I've started losing (lost a stone so far).

If you came to our Slimming World you would feel extremely UNfat, I can assure you.

(I thought you were going to say you weighed at least 10 stone more than you did!)

LastOneDancing · 21/12/2013 12:00

I was 5'3 and a size 16 so bigger than you.
I used slimming world and the gym to get to a size 10 which I maintained for best part of 10 years - the only reason I'm not maintaining now is I'm pregnant Smile

You absolutely CAN do this if you want to and are willing to do the work. MN are here to help & support you if you need it.

SunnyL · 21/12/2013 12:00

Plusize (bad name choice btw - not going to help your self esteem is it?).

I was a very similar weight and size as you 2 years ago. I decided to stop moping about my size and get on and do something about it as like you i didnt want to waste my life worrying about my weight. I went on weight watchers online and stepped up my exercise. I'm now 2st5lbs lighter and feel great. It takes a few months to start training your brain to stop looking at fatty, carby food as a reward but I can honestly say at your size it is perfectly easy to lose weight. The hardest thing no matter what weight you are is getting the mental strength to do so.

AllIWantForChristmaaaasIsEWE · 21/12/2013 12:01

Absolutely not! In fact, i've heard (but could be completely wrong), that the more overweight you are, the quicker the weight comes off (as opposed to someone just slightly overweight or with a 'healthy' BMI).

When i was almost 12 stone (same height as you, OP), it took me 5 months to get to 9 stone 4. I worked out for 90 minutes a day (at home, in front of the TV when dd was asleep), and just cut out all crap. A 60 minute workout on the cross trainer, and 30 mins of light weights/stretches. Nothing too strenuous. And i ate no junk whatsoever.

Ideally, I'd like to be 9stone. But it's taking me about 4-5 weeks now just to lose a pound.

ToysRLuv · 21/12/2013 12:03

I'm a smidgen taller than you, and was over 90 kg at one point in my late teens, after being 56 kg and anorexic (no periods for a year, very low body fat, even though nit technically underweight). Am now 72 kg, down from 76, and aiming for 65 kg, which might be unrealistic. Will see.

The younger you are, the easier it is to lose weight. 81kg is really not that much. I weighed that after DS, 4 years ago, and only came down to 76 kg a year and a half ago. You just have to find a realistic goal, the motivation and a suitable diet, which is easier said than done. I have ways been motivated by upcoming events, like beach holidays or going to uni and not wanting to be the "fat one"..

trainersandcake · 21/12/2013 12:08

OP please don't feel all is lost.

Try going to Slimming World - it is a bit cringe at first but SO helpful, I have lost a stone and a half on it.

Good luck!

ShinyBlackNose · 21/12/2013 12:09

Please don't think you can't change this. You can! Maybe it will take six months, maybe a year. Small changes to your diet and levels of activity will have large incremental results over a period of time.

Weight watchers are good and you can follow the plan as an online member if attending groups doesn't work for you.

Don't give up. If you over eat draw a line under it and move on.

Keep in your head the thought that by your 21st birthday you will be at your target weight and you will be healthy for the rest of your life!!

Miranda79 · 21/12/2013 12:15

I am a few inches shorter than you, and have been 79kg before. I find weight watchers online and plenty of exercise works, and I can maintain my weight at about 69kg (still slightly high BMI, but I'm ok with that). Currently pregnant so putting it back on again, but know I can lose the baby weight sensibly when I'm ready.

If you have a smart phone, use an app to track everything you eat. My fitness pal is a good free one to start with, if you don't want to join weight watchers or slimming world type of programs. At your age, it will come off easily enough if you are motivated. Walk lots (I also use a fit bit pedometer, even now) or consider buying a bike and cycle instead of drive/get the bus.

Good luck! Don't stress over Christmas and new year, turn over a new leaf in January. You could have a new you for Easter! Good luck, and show your mum (and most importantly you) that you can do it!

MsJupiterJones · 21/12/2013 12:16

I first lost weight around your age. I have to say that 15+ years on, the hardest thing by far is to keep the weight off. I still don't have the answer but I would say, try to lose it as slowly as possible so you can maintain the loss. Make exercise part of your life (maybe when you have lost the first stone or so and are feeling more confident). Find good foods you like. Try to avoid feeling deprived. Take care of your mental health and practise mindfulness. Watch what others eat.

I know how hard it can be but to be honest the 2 hardest things are getting started and then keeping it off. The actual weight loss part is quite fun when you get into it.

You are definitely not too fat to lose weight (I don't think anyone is!) and your mother has been cruel to suggest it. You can change your life in so many ways.

Lazysuzanne · 21/12/2013 12:21

I can't help wondering why your mum isn't being more encouraging?

Of course you can lose weight, don't even think about points of no return.
You can change, don't let anyone tell you different!

Topaz25 · 21/12/2013 12:22

I was 13 stone and I've lost half a stone and 2 dress sizes so far with the 5:2 diet and exercise so it is possible. There are stories in the media of extremely obese people who have lost weight so there is not a point of no return. Don't be so hard on yourself.

FairPhyllis · 21/12/2013 12:31

It's actually easier to lose weight when you are heavier because your body requires more energy to function and maintain weight when you are heavier. You will lose weight faster at first than you will when you get close to your target weight. So that could be quite encouraging for you?

I've lost about 2 stones over the last year, which has been hard going sometimes but I have had a lot of support from family while doing it which really makes a difference. Your mum doesn't sound very supportive - if she wouldn't be supportive maybe something like Slimmers World could be helpful?

You're certainly not too fat to lose weight!

BeeMom · 21/12/2013 12:40

Your mother is spouting bollocks.

I used to weigh 25.5 stone, I have lost 12.5 stone (and did it in my late 30s-40). I am still losing, but at 5'10" and the build of a rugby player I am close to my goal.

As to the rate of loss - slow and steady is more maintainable long term. Make changes you can live with for the rest of your life, because if you "diet", then as soon as you go back to your old habits, you'll find the weight again, and likely more.

SmiteYouWithThunderbolts · 21/12/2013 12:42

I'm a bit shorter than you and about a stone heavier. I know I can lose weight if I eat properly and get some regular exercise, but I struggle to stick with it because I have a really buggered up relationship with food.

IMO, there isn't a "point of no return" in physiological terms with losing weight, but there can be prohibitive mental aspects that are much harder to overcome if you want to break the cycle of overeating and being miserable.

I've had a couple of books recommended to me, one of which I've forgotten the title but the other is the Paul McKenna "I Can Make You Thin" (hateful title, IMO). Apparently they're very good for challenging how you view food and eating, which is a crucial step to losing weight if you're like me and have all sorts of ishoos bound up with your weight.

specialsubject · 21/12/2013 12:47

yes, there is a point of no return in practical terms, but unless you are Keith Martin (recently on Channel 4 but don't know what happened) you haven't reached it. He weighs hundreds of pounds.

given that you are only about a stone or so over, you are not really that fat.

just use the science of which your mother and many others are ignorant. Burn off more calories than you take in.

good luck.

honeybunny14 · 21/12/2013 12:50

You have nowhare near reached the point of no return after my 2nd dc i was a size 18 i had went from an 8/10 it was a little over a year when i got back to a 10 through healthy eating and dancing around my living room when dcs were in bed im a 12 at the moment due to over indulging the past couple of weeks . Dont be so hard on yourself your still very young so the weight will come off quicker

Lonecatwithkitten · 21/12/2013 12:58

As others have said you can do it, but only if it is what you want o do. Support is very important hence why any of the slimming clubs work. Personally Rosemary Connelly worked for me, but I know it is about finding the right program for you.
In January all of these clubs will do special offers so a great time to join. If it is what you want to do.

SunnyRandall · 21/12/2013 12:58

In June I weighed 12st 5lb. I now weigh 9st 10lb. It is very doable if you have the right mindset.

I did 5:2 then 6:1 and then just calorie counting using mfp. No exercise other than walking.

Do it. But maybe after Christmas.

pandarific · 21/12/2013 13:08

Definitely not too late! Have you been on various diets (weight watchers, atkins, slimming world, dukan, etc etc) before and just fallen off and gone straight back to how you were before? That's me - been on and off diets since I was, oh, 10 years old?

If you've been a yo yo dieter and you just want to break the cycle I can definitely recommend the 5:2 fast diet. There's lots of us doing it over here: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/fasting_diet

As long as you've not got a disordered relationship with food (anorexic, bulimic, or severe binging) it's brilliant. My own neurotic relationship with food has been helped a lot by following it, and weight comes off for most people steadily, and with almost no effort at all. I'm an emotional eater, and probably always will be, but it's so much better now that every food choice isn't a good or bad one, and that I'm free from guilt. You only need willpower of iron twice a week, and the rest of the time you can eat sensibly.

Plus as well as weight loss there are so many other benefits - significantly reduced risk of cancer, diabetes, high blood pressure... oh and glowing skin too as your body goes into 'repair' mode. Definitely grab the book for a read and see if you think it'd be right for you.

Also, sympathy for you on the Mum thing. Mums can be weird and controlling about their daughter's weights - mine is a lovely person, but I think every food complex I've ever had was passed on to me by her.
X

pandarific · 21/12/2013 13:10

Oh and I definitely second honey's recommendation of I Can Make You Thin by Paul MacKenna! It's a great companion to 5:2 fasting, as it's all about mindfully, calming approaching food habits and eating.

FlatFacedArmy · 21/12/2013 13:12

This time last year, OP, I weighed 186lbs (nearly 85kgs). I am the same height as you.

I lost over 16kgs, and I weigh 70kgs now (letting it slide for December!). I haven't looked at the kilo/lb/stone conversions in a bit but I do know my lowest weight, at end of November, was 150lbs.

It took me most of the year if I'm honest, about 9 months. Because I took holidays where I ate ALL the treats, and I gave up once or twice when I got bored or tired - and I gained a half stone again each time and had to lose it. It would take me two weeks to put on, and three to lose it - so I'd lose a month's progress.

I did a combination of 5:2 and low carbing, and both together for a month when I had a big family event coming up and a dress that I wanted to wear - I budgeted 8 weeks to fit into that dress and did it in five. It hadn't been worn in 3 years.

I went from obese to healthy on the NHS bmi app. You can do it too. PM me if you want to know any more.

TikkaTurkey · 21/12/2013 13:27

I feel your pain, as I really need to do something about my weight but just can't seem to motivate myself.
I lost quite a bit at SW, but I've put it all back on and then some when I stopped going.
I'M 5"3 and around 12.5 stone Sad which is the biggest I've ever been) and feel absolutely MASSIVE.
Need to get my arse into gear Sad

Haggischucker · 21/12/2013 13:28

You should realistically aim for a lb a week loss and others have said the slimming clubs are great for support and motivation. I lost 5.5 stone on weightwatchers.

Can I ask, is your mum overweight? Perhaps she would not like you to lose any weight and is potentially sabotaging you, I had someone like this when I started.

Good luck, anything is possible when you put your mind to it :)