To want to lie by the fire with

[MalcolmTuckersMistress]

Peter Capaldi and feed him champagne truffles and stroke his beautiful older man face while he reads me excerpts from A Christmas Carol with his sexy sexy sexy voice?

His hair isnt long enough now.

He could wear a wig?

It might fly off at an energetic and poorly timed moment, which would devastate us both.

Having Plan B make sweet, sweet lurve to me on a tropical beach at sunset.

Though for him, I'd even be happy with 15 mins in the back of a Rover metro.

But would you have to call him Plan B if you were getting jiggy?

Tom Hiddlestone reading me Shakespeare's sonnets by candlelight in front of an open fire. Although I might ruin the atmosphere a bit by getting him to do either the speech before Harfleur or the St Crispin's day speech from Henry V as well.

I'd like to get Joseph Gilgun, (Rudy from Misfits), on my fireside-flokati. He may well have been born when I was thirteen but I don't care. He just looks so naughty....

Oh Joseph Gilgun is an absolute mucky looking sex monkey! Totally filthy. I think you'd have to extinguish any flames if you got your mist on that one as you'd probably end up demolishing the entire room and not being able to walk afterwards!

Got your mist on??? That's a euphemism I haven't heard before!

(I know it was 'mitts', but I like it)

I would like to dance an Argentine tango with Jonathan Rhys Meyer, ripping clothing as we go. All in a
Dark castle library with a thunderstorm outside.

I can picture it.

Instead I'm sat at my kitchen table supervising a 2 and 3 year old eat porridge.

Malcolm I think I'd call him Ben if we were getting it on. Though in my head it would be like when they announce him on stage 'are you ready for Plaaaaaaannnn Beeeeee!'

Haha mist. Like sex mist created whilst being pummeled to within an inch of your life by a lusty gentleman.

I only have 4 truffles left now, so Peter had better hurry the fuck up or he'll get NOTHING.

Oh i thought of another one!

James mcavoy against a wheelie bin after seven pints of cider. Oh yes.

Mmmmm James McAvoy in-deeeeeeeeed

Tom Hiddleston reading Shakespeare while Peter Capaldi takes turns with Sam Neil to nibble my neck and I get a foot rub from Cillian Murphy.

If we are talking older men it's Chris Isaak any time,any place ,anywhere

Andrew Lincoln can have me read to me by a fire any time.

Surely he'd get the flops after seven pints OhBabyLilyMunster?

Andrew Lincoln though...oh yes indeed.

Seven pints just makes him even hornier.

I'd quite like to do the splits on Huw Edwards face.

^HAHAHAHAHAHA!

On reflection, in addition to Tom Hiddlestone and the Shakespeare sonnets, I require backrubs from Rupert Penry-Jones.

I am going to be greedy because I want two either James Blunt on a white sandy beach singing to me while we skinny dip or Benedict Cumberbatch curled in front of a fire showing me his superior intelligence hot at the though of it

I want to investigate Adam Levine's tattoos very closely. And then kiss each and every one of them.

(Desperately hoping he's tattooed inside his pantage area...)

I'd like Mads Mikkelsen to come round and give my cinnamon rolls a kneading please.