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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To feel a bit sickened and guilty about how much I have spent this Christmas?

33 replies

superstarheartbreaker · 15/12/2013 23:01

I just need to stop noooow. It's just all the little bits that add up. My dad gave me 50 pounds to buy something for myself and I ended up buying a beautiful broach that cost more than that but made up the difference myself.
This wouldn't be so bad if I didn't have normal non -Christmassy things to buy too. I can't help but feel a bit uncomfortable about my consumption this Christmas.

OP posts:
MarjorieChardem · 15/12/2013 23:07

How much have you spent? Come on, spill. Grin Can you afford it is the real question? If you can, without putting yourself into debt, don't feel bad about it. People's spending varies wildly at Xmas and it's nothing to do with anyone else what you choose to do with your money.

Screamqueen · 15/12/2013 23:08

You cant start a thread with that title and not say what you have spent!

Original poster
superstarheartbreaker · 15/12/2013 23:09

Ok £90.00 on a huge butler and wilson swallow pave broach. It's decadent. Trouble is dd wants me to get a cat and I feel that I should put the money towards that instead!

OP posts:
TravelinColour · 15/12/2013 23:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SPsWantsCliffInHerStocking · 15/12/2013 23:10

Just the broach?

Original poster
superstarheartbreaker · 15/12/2013 23:13

Yes. The broach is £90.00. It's beautiful and a real statement but too much.

OP posts:
onlyfortonight · 15/12/2013 23:13

I did the same last year. I saved up all year, spent the lot and some more besides. Had a great Christmas, but did feel a little bit sick when I thought of all the money I had spent.

I have been much more restrained this year ( although I haven't yet finished stockings - you are right, it is the little things that add up!).

As long as you can afford it, well, you have done your bit to keep people employed! Just make a resolution to hold back next year, and budget more tightly.

Lamu · 15/12/2013 23:14

I often used to get carried away whilst shopping, get home, feel incredibly guilty then take said item back on the Monday. There's nothing wrong with spending excessively so long as its well within your means.

MincedMuffPies · 15/12/2013 23:20

Fuck it OP, keep the broach it's christmas and really it's only £40 of your money. Much better to have something you really love and will cherish forever then waste it on cat shit. When your dad passes away you will always have this great christmas reminder of him and something to pass on to your dd when your old.

I call it fuck it thinking, try it and fuck it be happy.

Original poster
superstarheartbreaker · 15/12/2013 23:21

I'm going to hang on to it until Wednesday as I totally love it and can't quite get myself to part with it. Day off on Wednesday so will take it back then if I can let go.

OP posts:
onlyfortonight · 15/12/2013 23:23

Is £90 too much? That really depends on your personal circumstances. However, I know I feel really guilty if I spend any money on myself. My MIL always sends me a cheque for my birthday, and tell me to spend it on myself , but in reality I think most of it goes on the kids and normal domestic stuff.

If you feel too bad, why don't you ask another member of the family to share the present with your father. Explain what you have said to us and see if they would contribute something so you get what you really want.

It may seem a little bit grabby, but to be honest, if I asked my DH or DM this they would agree ( and my DH would be secretly pleased since it would let him off the hook of having to think of something himself). I would also be happy to be approached by someone to go halves on a present.

That said, I and my family are pretty laid back, so I could be sure not to cause offence, but you know your family!

Original poster
superstarheartbreaker · 15/12/2013 23:25

Thanks minced muffles. I have lusted after it for ages. I just hope that I don't loose it. I lost one of my favourite earrings the other week . So annoying!

OP posts:
VanitasVanitatum · 15/12/2013 23:26

Please don't spend money on a cat, rescue one. They will generally have been spayed/had their jabs already too.

onlyfortonight · 15/12/2013 23:26

Also what MincedMuffpies says!

( I loves the name muff!)

ThePlatypusAlwaysTriumphs · 15/12/2013 23:29

I always spend too much at Christmas, and do feel a little guilty, but we have saved money for me to blow each year, and I just think to hell with it- it's once a year, it matters to me, everyone has a good time, good memories etc.

Don't spend money on myself- nothing I actually want, tbh. Sounds sad, but what makes me happy is seeing the kids happy and everyone enjoying all the food/ drink etc. No regrets

MincedMuffPies · 15/12/2013 23:30

OP I have spent about £40 on my christmas presents to myself this year. I do't think thats excessive. My DM Dnan will buy me a nice gift also. My £40 worth of stuff is a dvd box set, hair clip, necklace, earrings and toblerone. A brooch that you love will last longer then my tat. Insure it if your that careless and be nice to yourself. I bet your dad would much prefer you to have this treat for yourself then buy a bloody litter tray.

Original poster
superstarheartbreaker · 15/12/2013 23:31

I think one reason why I wanted to buy it is to celebrate getting my new job as a teacher which I have been trying to get for ages...I should therefore keep it shouldn't I?

OP posts:
Original poster
superstarheartbreaker · 15/12/2013 23:32

Rescue centres are very strict vanitas and apparently my hours at work are too long.

OP posts:
rootypig · 15/12/2013 23:32

Keep it OP! Congrats on your job Thanks

MincedMuffPies · 15/12/2013 23:33

Keep it!

and thanks tonight Grin

changejustforyou · 15/12/2013 23:33

My mum bought a lot of jewelry. But at the back of her mind it was also meant as an investment of money and to be part of her inheritance. (just to make you feel less guilty :)

FortyDoorsToNowhere · 15/12/2013 23:33

Don't take it back, it sound like you have wanted this for a while so in not like it was an impulse buy you will regret but a gift you will love.

cozietoesie · 15/12/2013 23:33

Rescue cats aren't usually free, Vanitas - they'll likely have a fee (usually called 'a donation') ranging from - say - £50. It's still a darned good deal though given that the cats are usually neutered, vaccinated and may have a chip and it will go nowhere near the rescue's costs for that animal.

Original poster
superstarheartbreaker · 15/12/2013 23:35

Thank you everyone...I will try and share a link soon.

OP posts:
Ninasaurus · 15/12/2013 23:35

Keep the broach op!

Don't feel bad, it doesn't sound like you have overspent too much.

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