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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Is he just taking advantage of us?

41 replies

CiderBomb · 07/12/2013 15:20

I've got a younger DB and he's always been a little bit entitled and self absorbed, but is mostly a good person and I get along well with him most of the time.

Recently he's been asking either me or my parents to run him to places such as the pub on the weekend. Now I don't doing it from time to time, however I've noticed it's started happening every single weekend. I ran him into town last Friday night, and then my mum ran him to the pub he drinks at on the Saturday. It's happened for the past three weeks running.

Last week when he asked my mum she was a bit reluctant at first because she doesn't like driving in the dark at night. DB apparently got "huffy" with her and said "it's OK then I'll walk" and she backed down.

Now he's just asked me if I will run him and his partner to their friends house this evening and then come back for them at 11pm. Initially I said yes, but then I started to think about it and I think he's starting to to take the piss out of us. He just assumes we'll do it and is put out when we cant.

Am I just being a bit mean? I know there are lots of parties and friends get together at this time of year. But it's every week and it's not even Xmas for another fortnight. It never even enters his head to book a taxi.

WWYD?

OP posts:
BohemianGirl · 07/12/2013 15:27

He asks

You have the choice of saying "yes, I'll do you a favour" or "no, get a cab"

I suppose it depends on your family dynamic. We wouldnt think anything of doing each other a favour.

jimijack · 07/12/2013 15:27

Is he a teenager?

FracturedViewOfLife · 07/12/2013 15:28

Buy him a driving lesson voucher for Christmas?

I don't know as I don't drive and I was the eldest.

Original poster
CiderBomb · 07/12/2013 15:30

Not a teenager, no. Add ten years on that and you'd be there....

He already drives, but if he took the car he'd have to stay off the drink so obviously he's not prepared to do that.

OP posts:
FunkyBoldRibena · 07/12/2013 15:32

Bus? Train? Cab?

Just stop doing it if you don't want to do it.

Preciousbane · 07/12/2013 15:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

lackingimagination · 07/12/2013 15:32

Say no, he is taking the piss. Once every now and then would be fine.
Love the idea of giving him a driving lesson for Christmas Grin

jimijack · 07/12/2013 15:33

Does he give you lifts to places in return?

Original poster
CiderBomb · 07/12/2013 15:36

Jimkjack, not really, but that's more because I never really ask him. I tend to either drive myself and not drink, or call a cab.

OP posts:
ENormaSnob · 07/12/2013 15:37

Wtf?

Why is he skiving lifts if he can drive/get a taxi/walk?

FracturedViewOfLife · 07/12/2013 15:38

Oh, if he already drives then I would give him the local taxi number.

AnnieJanuary · 07/12/2013 15:40

Ten years older than a teenager?

Laugh in his face ad tell him to grow up and start looking after himself, the big manbaby.

PublicEnemyNumeroUno · 07/12/2013 15:42

I'd tell him to jog on. The odd occasion is fine but every weekend is taking the piss, tell him you have your own bloody life, does he give you petrol money?

Original poster
CiderBomb · 07/12/2013 15:43

Annie, I'd love to tell him that. It wouldn't go down well though....

A few months back he wanted a lift somewhere and it turned out I was out and so were my parents so he'd had to get a taxi. All he did after was whinge about how expensive it was...

OP posts:
YouTheCat · 07/12/2013 15:45

He's not appreciative of your time and money so just say no every single time from now on.

He can walk or get a taxi.

Original poster
CiderBomb · 07/12/2013 15:49

Should also add that no, he doesn't give us petrol money.

OP posts:
FracturedViewOfLife · 07/12/2013 15:51

Start charging him the local taxi rate to get places (or guess if you don't know)?

MistAllChuckingFrighty · 07/12/2013 15:53

Does he ever give you lifts anywhere ?

I thought not

Tell the using fucker to jog on. Why are you bothered if he has a little sulk about it ?

Original poster
CiderBomb · 07/12/2013 16:00

Lol, "the using fucker".

He's just very entitled. Not sure why really as he was never spoiled, although I suppose thinking about it my mum did molly coddle him a bit. Compared to some men through he's not really a "mummy's boy".

OP posts:
starofbethlehemfishmummy · 07/12/2013 16:01

So how about a "No" followed by a comment about it being his turn to be your taxi driver for a while. Said with a smile.

MoominMammasHandbag · 07/12/2013 16:32

He's not a mind reader though is he? As long as everyone keeps giving him lifts he'll assume it is fine to ask for them.
Ask for some lifts yourself OP, see how he responds to that.

Mumoftwoyoungkids · 07/12/2013 16:41

" Umm I think so but I'll need to check my diary. While we are on the subject if lifts can you take me to ....."

Every Single Time.

FrostedButts · 07/12/2013 17:38

so how does he get back after the pub??

taxi?
drunken walking?

Nvm.didn't read the bit where he asked you to pick him up as well, the cheeky shit! I read "run him to" as just taking him there which imo isn't as bad, taxi both ways is pricey... but let him get himself home!

Original poster
CiderBomb · 07/12/2013 17:48

He'd rather walk home in the pouring rain than pay for a taxi. He's that tight.

OP posts:
mrsjay · 07/12/2013 17:50

My sister started to do this it was a lift here a lift there and she got a bit giddy when dd passed her test the other year I had to get dd to say no as my sister was basically taking the piss she is a lot older than a teen and she is more than able to get a taxi, she phoned dd at 2 am one morning pissed and wanting a lift home, op just say no let him sulk he is a grown man