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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

jack monroe

84 replies

ihatemincepies · 04/12/2013 20:46

Ok. Going to start a huge bun fight but here we go. Why the heck did Jack Monroe quite a good job then moan about being poor!! Read an article she wrote where she said she had given her ex partner their son on Christmas day because she was to poor to give him a good crimbo!! I could never do that!! Please enlighten me.

OP posts:
Twoandtwomakeschaos · 04/12/2013 21:46

I don't think the Op is full of bile and don't see why they shouldn't ask a question, if they don't understand why something happened. Equally, I don't see why they should be lambasted by other respondees. Why be as nasty to the Op as you castigate them for being to the subject of the post? Sure, yes, we could all Google for answers to stuff, but this is meant to be an informative and interesting site full of people with contrasting views and experiences. So many posters seem to be got at if they are less than perfect with their phrasing or terminology. Are there really people/situations about which questions cannot be asked? How odd and dictatorial.

IamInvisible · 04/12/2013 21:49

She gave her one year old son to his father because she had no food and her flat was freezing. He didn't know it was Christmas. I fail to see what is selfish about that.

She is a good person.

What you should be irritated about and questioning is why people are in that sort of situation in the 21st century in the UK! David Cameron isn't cold and hungry is he? While he is stuffing his face with fine food and wine, warming his feet by the fire paid for by us on Christmas Day, there will be lots of Jacks! Your annoyance is aimed at the wrong person!

Mintyy · 04/12/2013 21:52

"Jack has replied to my tweets many times, has come onto a Local Mumsnet site, responds to many of her readers and is a compassionate, erudite and thoroughly decent human being. I think she truly is a Woman of Substance. I am straight but i so would fwink..."

Oh God, that's a bit embarrassing. Surely it is possible to admire someone without slobbering all over them.

Mignonette · 04/12/2013 21:54

I slobber over all kinds of people so don't worry, Jack doesn't have to suffer my attentions too many times a week Smile

Can somebody leave a saucer of milk out for the cat BTW?

EssentialCoffee · 04/12/2013 21:57

If Jack is on here then can I say hello?! I signed the petition today - let's hope more sign up and some progress is made!

Mignonette · 04/12/2013 22:05

I signed slobbered all over it too Xmas Wink.

Darkesteyes · 04/12/2013 22:07

I signed too. I think Jack is great. AND she won Blogger of the Year at this years Red Hot Women Awards. (Red Magazines annual awards)

Meanwhile over in Jamie Oliver land he is now showing his support for the Daily Mirrors foodbank appeal Saw the article on my Twitter feed earlier but cant find it now.
Wonder if he really is that bothered or hes jumping on this because of his MAJOR PR fuck up a few months ago.

whois · 04/12/2013 22:08

I am a single mum to three kids

Really? And you get by just fine and dandy without any state or family support? Well bully for you.

Mignonette · 04/12/2013 22:12

Hi Darkest (((waves))))

Yes I saw the coverage of 'Red Hot' too and mentally applauded her. I cannot claim to have read her blog from the first and only started reading it after Xanthe Clay's article but I think she writes so well although she desperately needs to have a bit of a rest. She must be knackered.

JO's goose was truly cooked by that PR fuck up.

BertieBowtiesAreCool · 04/12/2013 23:25

Anyway why shouldn't a child spend Christmas with their father? That's not selfish at all, quite the opposite - I used to spend every other Christmas with my dad and I have fantastic memories. I have fantastic memories of Christmas with my mum as well, and I'm grateful to her for not keeping them all to herself - it was great to get the best of both worlds.

agirlcalledjack · 05/12/2013 08:15

Well hello. waves

I hesitated before posting because on the last thread I had the audacity to calmly lay the facts out and was accused of killing the thread by reading/responding to it, but never mind. This one seems to have largely resolved itself, Thankyou to everyone who said what I would have said.

In the OPs defence, I get this question on a daily basis. Quite literally. I understand why if someone only has a few of the facts that they might fly off the handle thinking I had sailed out of work onto a life on benefits, but the reverse is true.

Anyway, thanks Mumsnetters who stepped in with facts - it is kind of exhausting waking up every day to a different person you hates and derides you, but I'm sadly rather used to it by now. The Internet is a wonderful and awful place in pretty equal measure, but the abuse is endless and exhausting and messes with your head. So thanks perfectstorm, mignonette, and others for the facts and support. (squish)

And shameless plug, but please sign my petition for an inquiry into food bank use and UK hunger. Its got 91,000 signatures already in just two days - i'm clearly not the only person who cares about this: www.change.org/foodbanks

caramelwaffle · 05/12/2013 08:29

Good morning.

I'll sign.

Shift work + child(ren) = nightmare. I know.

Good luck with everything.

Vatta · 05/12/2013 08:49

Good morning Jack! I had your aubergine curry last night, it was awesome.

Don't forget that for every 1 person criticising you there are a boatload of mumsnetters who think you've done amazingly well. :)

sashh · 05/12/2013 08:56

No not sheltered. I just don't understand ANYONE quitting a job during this current climate.

Welfare of your child vs Job.

Sorry, not a parent but who in their right mind puts the welfare of their child second? And that is not a go at working mothers or fathers, it is about individual circumstances.

Also wasn't she in the fire service? Am I being unfair to say if I am in need of the fire service I want their minds on me?

PointyChristmasFairyWand · 05/12/2013 09:03

jack I signed before this thread started and only responded to the thread because so much crap misguided stuff has been written about you by people with an axe to grind and like many here I felt the record needed to be set straight.

minifingers · 05/12/2013 09:16

Signed petition

I like your spirit. Smile

PenguinsDontEatPancakes · 05/12/2013 09:20

I'm going to sign later when not on my phone.

Have a wonderful Christmas Jack. Even with all the shit, it must feel pretty good to see what you've achieved in a couple of years.

OneLittleToddleTerror · 05/12/2013 09:24

Really OP. I struggle with childcare and both DH and I are not in shift work. Nurseries only open from 8-6 and with a commute. It'd be hard to even do a proper 9-5 if you have to do pick up and drop off. I really don't see how lone parents can do shift work. Unless of course you have grandparent care. Not everyone has.

OneLittleToddleTerror · 05/12/2013 09:26

My contracted standard hours are 9-5.30. That's what I mean by it being impossible to do office hour if your commute is over 30min. You need two parents with flexible working arrangement to actually be able to fit around nursery opening hours.

IamInvisible · 05/12/2013 09:34

I signed the petition earlier on in the week, as has DS1(18).

I hope you and your son have a happy Christmas Jack. Xmas Smile

Tailtwister · 05/12/2013 09:39

For some reason I remember her working for the fire service and it was an issue around working shifts as a single parent? I'm not aware of any reasonably priced childcare which would cover shift work, but correct me if I'm wrong.

Tailtwister · 05/12/2013 09:41

Apologies, I've just seen Jack has responded herself. I will sign the petition now.

alranson · 05/12/2013 13:02

feels very weird when someone who is the subject of a thread suddenly turns up on it!

Jack I saw a link to your blog on Facebook four months ago and read the whole thing at one sitting. I have a Small Boy too and was so upset by what I read in your blog that I contacted my local foodbank via the Trussell Trust and offered to do/give whatever they needed (yes I know that we shouldn't need foodbanks at all but we are where we are - the need is unfortunately not going to disappear overnight). There are not many people who can move others to action with their writing but yours is very powerful.

Incidentally the foodbank never took me up on my offer. They wanted me to fill out and return a lot of forms (which I did immediately) and said I would need a DBS (to which I said fine) and then nothing. Have followed up twice. Is v frustrating.

Mignonette · 05/12/2013 13:05

It is a good and useful reminder that the subjects of criticism on MN are real people with feelings. Makes us all more accountable for our behaviour.