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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to not want ds to be a prop in the school play

69 replies

kalms1971 · 04/12/2013 09:42

dh has put in a holiday day and when he found out ds is not even in the show he was really disappointed. He will be dressed all in black as a "prop", not really what we what to see :( I have mentioned politely to the teacher that surely they could have done something more to make everyone included. Other children are singers and at least get to be christmassy!

OP posts:

miaowmix · 04/12/2013 13:06

So he's a stage-hand, or crew then?
Still an important role. Main roles shouldn't necessarily go to the most outgoing children. I think it's nice that the shyer kids get a chance to shine too (can you tell my DD is Mary this year )?

Morgause · 04/12/2013 13:21

It's an important job. Who else do you think should do it? If not your DS it would be someone's DS or DD.

Only reliable kids get to do that sort of job. Trust me, I'm a drama teacher.

Rpeg · 04/12/2013 13:32

Oh FFS how MANY threads can there be whining about your precious kid not getting the perfect role in a bloody Christmas play? GROW UP. Please.

greenfolder · 04/12/2013 14:44

Aw bless, I agree it is how you react-teacher will have chosen him because he is reliable, responsible and organised ( see also my 6 year old who is banging a glockenspeil because of her "brilliant sense of timing")

SlimJiminy · 04/12/2013 15:22

I was always the narrator in the school play. I hated it. Standing there, no costume to hide behind - just me standing there going bright red. But I was loud so they made me do it anyway. Turns out, everyone was always jealous that I got that role every year. Only found that out a few years ago. I'm still crap at public speaking now.

I'm sure there are loads of kids who'd love to have his part - and probably don't fancy doing whatever they're doing - but let him get on with his important role and prove what a great job he can do. You do sound a bit precious that your 'very outgoing' son will be in the background while someone else gets to take centre stage. Nothing wrong with letting the not-so-outgoing kids do some acting/singing.

pantsjustpants · 04/12/2013 15:30

He's crew!

The industry I work in is the behind the scenes entertainment industry - he's a cool dude. These guys make everything work!! It's a fab career too

Nanny0gg · 04/12/2013 16:25

But he won't be behind the scenes will he? He'll be moving stuff onstage in front of everyone (unless you've a posh school with a proper stage and curtains and everything).

PuppyMonkey · 04/12/2013 16:32

I'm slightly disappointed, I was imagining him having to be a prop for a washing line or something. Most random nativity role ever.

I remember having to be a wave once. As in a wave in the sea. In a nativity.

Because we all remember the beach scenes in the Christmas story.

GreenShadow · 04/12/2013 16:42

Frustrating isn't it.

My DS was also very keen to be in charge of props rather than be on display on the stage. He loved crawling around under the stage to pass a prop up through a hole - but this wasn't much fun for us to watch.....

BohemianGirl · 04/12/2013 16:42

He is very outgoing so seems really odd he will be behind the scenes

outgoing thats code isn't it? We all know thats a code

Do you think he's quite exuberant and overshadows other people so the teacher has made a conscious decision to let some of the quieter pupils have their turn to shine?

Ragwort · 04/12/2013 16:57

Just wait until your child gets to secondary school - you will look back on this and be embarrassed about how seriously you all took it. .

I am soooooo grateful I never have to sit through any more excrutiating school plays.

nicename · 04/12/2013 17:02

It's a shame that the teacher didn't take time to explain to the children how important each role is in its own way, and that it just wouldn't work unless all the parts work together.

Bowlersarm · 04/12/2013 17:11

Yes yabu.

He has an important part to play in the production, and now you are projecting disappointment.

You need to be a bit more adult about the whole thing and both go and support your ds. He'll be thrilled.

Pixel · 04/12/2013 17:18

Ragwort, mine is in secondary but we've still got the pleasure of the Christmas play this year, it's one of the joys of special school. Wouldn't want to miss it though, it's usually very entertaining even if not much goes to plan .
Am just hoping ds stays in the hall 'on stage' for longer than the 0.5 seconds he managed last year, so I learned long ago that there isn't a lot of point in taking it seriously .

At least a prop or stage hand is a useful job OP, and not some made-up at the last minute 'extra' part when the teachers realise with horror that they have too many children who want to be in it (yes my dd was that snowflake).

womblesofwestminster · 04/12/2013 20:38

can you tell my DD is Mary this year

Stop gloating. So vile.

skittycat · 04/12/2013 21:23

YABU.

Not every child can have lead roles in whatever the christmas play is, but there is no need to belittle any other role your child has. Stage crew is a great job to do, and is important as well. Imagine if theatre shows such as the lion king had no stage crew... it wouldn't work.

Original poster

kalms1971 · 04/12/2013 21:32

Thankyou. You are all sensible and that's why I love this website :)

OP posts:

Theas18 · 04/12/2013 21:40

Aww go and be proud of him

I was entertain DS (17) in the car with all the mums net Xmas play woes (especially the one where mum wanted child opted out of "religion" but in the nativity play) and he reminded me he got a but typecast as Gabriel in reception yr2 and yr3 ( utter proudness- Gabe was the cool dude "main man" in the yr3 play!)- this may be due to being the only boy willing to wear a dress... Fortunately cricket whites in year 3.

However....in yr1 he was the night sky and got to walk round with another boy waving floaty black material!

It's all great xmassy fun. Enjoy it as it soon stops.

Bettercallsaul1 · 04/12/2013 21:42

Putting on a play is a fantastic way for children to learn to co-operate together to create something worthwhile.

All of the kids have to work together - the actors have to listen out for their cues from one another, the dancers have to synchronize their movements (more or less!) and the backstage crew have to make sure the props and scenery are there at the right time and then removed at the end of the scene. It is a lesson in taking responsibility and looking out for each other.

Ideally, the roles should be rotated every year to ensure everyone gets the chance to participate in each area.

Bettercallsaul1 · 04/12/2013 21:44

Putting on a play is a fantastic way for children to learn to co-operate together to create something worthwhile.

Ideally, the roles should be rotated every year to ensure everyone gets the chance to participate in each area.

Bettercallsaul1 · 04/12/2013 21:45

Sorry, hit the "Post* button twice!

ilovesooty · 04/12/2013 21:54

Stop gloating. So vile

Was that a serious comment?

miaowmix · 05/12/2013 12:41

womblesofwestminster do get over yourself you utter twat. I made an obvious tongue in cheek reference to the fact that I was pleased my shy daughter has been picked to be Mary. Because she's not outgoing . And that's your response?
Pathetic.

MimiSam · 05/12/2013 12:56

'Prop' doesn't always mean crew - my 6 year old said that there are some children in her class who are 'doors' in the nativity play. Doors, as in wooden things that open and close...

Kinnane · 05/12/2013 13:06

doors!!!!!!!!!!!

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