To be fed up of parents letting their 10/11 year olds play 16 & 18 certificate video games?

[Audilover]

DS1 is 10 and threw a paddy tonight because we won't let him play Xbox games that have 16 and/or 18 certificates.
He has always said that his friends are allowed to play them but we've always taken that with a pinch of salt.
He has Xbox live so he can play with his friends all of whom are around the same age as him. Out of the 15 online friends that he has, at least 7 of them are online playing Call Of Duty or other 18 certificate games.
We are as strict on video games as we are on DVD's but we feel we are fighting a losing battle as so and so's parents let them play them.
Our 17 yr old DD is allowed to play 18 certificates as she will be 18 in 3 months time but she certainly wasn't allowed to play them at 10 years.

I had a seven year old tell me at school that he'd been playing CoD shock with his older brothers.

Was that my son?

My 10 year old has COD and so do many of his friends. I've watched him play it. Nothing on it has shocked me. It isn't real and it certainly hasn't made my son, or any of his friends, turn in to violent, foul mouthed murderers. In fact, they are a lovely bunch of boys.

To be honest, I tried to resist but my DSs have much older step brothers and were playing it at their father's house a long time before I gave in.

I don't care what other parents do tbh, we have our own set of principles and we stick to them, it really is easy if you don't ever give in to peer pressure.
not holier than thou, we too learnt the hard way, but now it is so much easier.
my response is just that "I don't care what x's parents allow, we don't" end of.

aciddrops if your 7yo attends a primary school in East London, maybe it was! The older brother is 21.

I have an 11 yr old who is desperate to play these games, COD etc as most of his friends play them and have been doing do for a few years. On Mn it seems to be mostly parents whose children aren't allowed these games - in real life it is the opposite in my experience.

My son was playing 18 games by the age of 13, to be honest i was fighting a losing battle as my ex played them in front of him anyway. I don't really have a problem with most of them, the same with 18 films, he saw plenty of those before 18 if i had seen them and thought they were ok for him i let him watch them, its up to me what my child sees. I wouldn't let him play them with friends unless i checked with the parents.

A few things I've noticed on this thread are that comment have been made along the line of "a few months off 18 etc", which seems extreme and makes me wonder if any of you saying this have teen or older teen DC.

Also not everyone subscribes to the rating system. I don't support the 12/15/18 concept, I don't agree with those as age points. I feel that a top rating of 16 would be more appropriate.

My DC do play these games, my DH is a gamer and I've usually sat through them playing the game at least a few times. The only thing I've found shocking is the language/behaviour of others playing the game.

BlondieTinsellyMinx Nope, not mine then!

My 12 year old DS had a friend (same age) over yesterday who has been playing GTA since he was 10, yet is not allowed to go the park by himself. Crazy!

Many thanks for the recommendation of the Common Sense Media site - it's really helpful.

On one hand he's playing Minecraft and Pokemon, and yet wants Saints Row. So I think he sees Saints Row as just a different way of blowing things up to reach a goal, and wouldn't translate it to a RL context. But in a teen, the ways of looking at the world are changing, personal ethos is developing and I don't want him regularly exposed to that world picture.

Can anyone recommend games that are more suitable and appeal to younger teens? Maybe something that has the more urban 'shooter' aspects, but where the gamer plays a 'good guy' role to rid the city of miscreants? Where 'kill' shots are stylised not graphic? And where there is plenty of silliness in the types of vehicles and kit you get to 'play' with?

Yanbu. My 6 year old nephew was telling me the other week how he was using a submarine in Grand Theft Auto he plays it with daddy apparently so that's okay

It really depends how they are playing it. My dd started playing cod when she was 5, by playing I mean we set up the map where the only other person/"baddie" was dp and she played virtual hide and seek trying to find him on the map! Totally harmless, not violent etc but she still told her teacher she'd been playing black ops at the weekend

Can anyone recommend games that are more suitable and appeal to younger teens? Maybe something that has the more urban 'shooter' aspects, but where the gamer plays a 'good guy' role to rid the city of miscreants? Where 'kill' shots are stylised not graphic? And where there is plenty of silliness in the types of vehicles and kit you get to 'play' with?

Crackdown? An oldie from 2006ish on the Xbox 360. You're a super-agent who is ridding the city from gangs and it's also not to be taken very seriously.

Also Just Cause 2 for PS3 or 360, you're a CIA agent who is working undercover for gangs in a fictional island nation, lots of fun. There's no getting away from the fact that they're largely about gun fighting but they aren't really gruesome and the plots are just excuses to cause mayhem. Just checked and Common Sense Media do disagree with me on this, though, saying they're 'not for kids'. For me, the context and tone would give both games leeway with teens. Up to you to read the reviews and decide based on your values and your DS, though.

Halo in my mind is perfect Edith. In depth story, more laser tag than war. You're the goodies. I've wept at Halo 4. The characters are brilliant. DS has been playing it for years, despite my mother's po face over the cert.

Very little bad language and it's not gory. For all it's a 16 after playing it myself I had no issue letting ds. I still haven't given him fags or drink so rest assured my neglect doesn't run that far.

Of course YABU....it's none of your business what other people let their kids do - you have your rules and that should be that, regardless of what his mates do.

It is not the same as letting ypur dc smoke, drink or have sex - those things are illegal because they are proven to be damaging to children's health. Playing COD is not illegal - the age ratings are a guide, they are not law, except for retailers selling to under 18s (presumably because they have no idea whether parents have consented). There is also nothing to prove that games are harmful - for every study suggesting one pov you can find one which makes the opposite case. This is why parents should make their owb decisions.

Personally I think films can be far more disturbing because they are 'real' in a way that graphics, however good, simply aren't.

I think we need to be careful with age ratings generally because there are films which are not explicit, so get lowish age ratings but are imo very upsetting and not suitable for all viewers aged 15.

So yabu because other parents make choices as they see fit - it doesn't nake then wrong just because you woukd choose differently.