AIBU to quit my job.

[mumofbeautys]

I'm a single mum to twins aged 4 who both suffer with cystic fibrosis. I work full time and I'm constantly on the go. One of my girls suffers with extreme cf. My whole life is work and them.
But is it wrong to quit my job and lose that stability

And what is the father doing/contributing? OP, I couldn't do what you are doing on a day to day basis.

I don't think you'd be at all unreasonable.

If it helps, as a tax payer I wouldnt have an issue with you doing that.

In your position, work would have to be sacrificed.
I think you have enough on your plate and your kids need you on top form.

Op, you sound as if deep down you really want to
be at home full time and that was my gut feeling when I read this. They need you, you want to be there: do it. It's the right thing, for all of you.

Sorry I will try and answer a few questions .. I have childcare which I pay extra for due to added care for 2 days a week and then 3 days I work nights to make sure I'm available for appointments. During the night my brother sleeps over and looks after them and I'm on standby if he needs Me .
We had them young and the dad didn't grow up .. he doesn't see them and pays 5 pound csa.

YANBU - do what is right for you and your family. If that means relying on benefits, then do so.

Working full time with two young children who have health issues is too much, unless you have extensive family help and/or unlimited funds to pay for help. You will make yourself ill if you carry on. Part time might be a good option, but don't hesitate to quit if you feel that will be best for you and your children.

Do what is right for you. This time is precious (although I can understand that it may not feel that way). If work makes you feel better, then do it. If it's only adding to your stress then don't.

YANBU, but that is coming from a confirmed sahm.
I would leave in an instant if it didn't make my family worse of financially.
In your position it is understandable that you should have benefits it is what the system is there for after all.
I can't imagine how hard it must be for you and how exhausted you must be.
If it is right for your family, I think you have to swallow proud and morals.

sorry pride, not proud.

Another tax later here saying I wouldn't begrudge you all the the help you can get.
But for your mental well being and respite, I think you'd be better off working part time.

So effectively you are working nights and up all day with the girls afterwards 3 times a week? You must be on your knees. You need to take the break before you health deteriorates and you become ill yourself. Sorry I know that sounds blunt, but I have seen it happen.

Have you thought about part time or a career break? Have the girls got DLA? You can have it even if you are working and that would mean you could pay for an extra day care to get some respite if you did continue to work. Have you got a social worker from the children's disability team?

By the way your brother sounds like a star, I am glad he is supporting you.

You (dds really) must surely qualify for DLA? This isn't a condition that is going to go away.... Speak to your health visitor, gp, or whoever else is supporting you (I hope you have someone) to help you in filling out the forms. Alongside this, you would (should) also qualify for Carer's Allowance. The two together should (in theory at least) allow you to financially manage and possibly get someone in to help you.
Don't struggle on alone. I understand the pressure you are under (I have a dc with severe visual impairment).
You could also qualify for aquacare if your local water company do it for extra washing, and maybe a reduction on your electricity too.
Get an appointment with CAB to find out what else you would be entitled to.

I'm off to bed now but pm me if you want to ask me anything. I'm a support worker in this area.

I would quit. Kids come first and looking after them is a job in my eyes, even more so with health issues.

In your shoes, I would quit. Something has to give and it can not be your own health, both physical and emotional. The consequences of you being ill are too great.

I wouldn't quit. I have been tempted with only once child who is disabled, and a completely different challenge to CF. I did quit when he was little due to his then fairly everyday medical needs and found that I felt trapped. The solution has been part time work. It give me one foot in another camp.

I mean everyday as in they were a need everyday, not just the usual childhood ailments.

I think I would quit, sounds like you'd be far better off tbh. I'm currently looking at early retirement, similar reasons in terms of being constantly stressed etc... My only concern is something unforeseen happening and / or whether id leave my ds more if I stayed working...

YANBU x a million.

It's for families like yours I'd love my taxes to go.

Give up. Go back part time if you miss it. Claim every DLA/carers allowance you can ( can someone on SN thread help?)

Look after yourself for your sake and your DTs

I would quit in those circumstances if I wouldbe no worse off tbh

Yanbu.

I would quit in your situation and I'm saying that as a parent of one child with a disability. Make sure you claim anything you can (dla x2, carers tax credits income support housing council tax benefit)

Get a carers assessment and see what help you can get from the council for care for your girls.