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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

that a decorator should not ask

90 replies

PTFO · 14/11/2013 12:37

me to make his lunch for him then sit at the top of the stairs eating in?

Hes painting the bathroom. He asked if he could have his lunch- yes fine. He asked if I had a microwave- no I don't why do you ask? oh er could you just bung my spag bog in a pan and heat it through for me....er really its frozen solid. yes thanks...he then helped himself to a bowl and fork to add to my washing up. oh and he knew which cupboard had the bowls in straight away but he does appear to be washing said bowl up...

I might ask he lives five mins away...

OP posts:
bragmatic · 14/11/2013 12:39

I think I'd have heated it up for him. He can't eat it frozen solid, obviously.

EeyoreIsh · 14/11/2013 12:39

Erm, that's a bit off! The using your microwave is ok, but not going through your cupboards!

We're having work done at the moment, made a cup of tea then left the house for two hours. When we came back they'd helped themselves to fresh mugs, coffee, tea, sugar etc. I don't mind if I'm out for the day but I'd leave things out so they're not going through cupboards.

bragmatic · 14/11/2013 12:40

I agree it's strange to ask….I'd expect a polite "do you mind if I heat it up in a pan". Rather than ask you to do it.

RevengeWiggle · 14/11/2013 12:41

He asked, and washed up after himself. I wouldn't mind.

RevengeWiggle · 14/11/2013 12:42

Oh I didn't notice that, yes it's a but weird that he wanted you to do it for him!

Gossipyfishwife · 14/11/2013 12:42

What is your problem? That he should ask you to heat his food (you did not "make it " if he brought it) or that he should sit at the top of the stairs to eat it. Ok I find eating it at the top of the stairs a little odd. Maybe he felt uncomfortable using your kitchen or dining room.
So on balance I think you may be a teensie weensie bit unreasonable.

Mylovelyboy · 14/11/2013 12:45

what a prick cheek.
Where do these people get off. Will be bringing his washing round next.

Mylovelyboy · 14/11/2013 12:46

I would not expect my decorator to start cooking in my kitchen. He should have bought some sandwiches and gone and eaten them in his van............the bastard Grin

bragmatic · 14/11/2013 12:46

See, the thing is, I can't see a female tradesperson asking the home owner to prepare their lunch. Asking if they could use the kitchen facilities, fine. But not actually asking them to actually heat it up.

In the grand scheme of life in general, it's not exactly barbaric. Just a bit…unyewshual.

bragmatic · 14/11/2013 12:47

^^ 1 to many actuallys.

bragmatic · 14/11/2013 12:47

too many.

I'll bugger off now.

icingmyback · 14/11/2013 12:49

yanbu
he's not a houseguest! he should sort out his own lunch. fair enough if he'd forgotten a fork, but he packed his lunch this morning expecting you to help him to prepare it. what if you'd been out/busy/ill/cleaning your cooker?
i'd have heated it for him, but i'd have been annoyed.

EeyoreIsh · 14/11/2013 12:50

To me the problem wouldn't be wanting to use your facilities, it's the helping himself and expecting you to do the heating up!

littlewhitebag · 14/11/2013 12:53

I suppose he brought the spag bol expecting you would have a microwave. It was bit rude of him to ask you to heat it up though. He could have asked if you minded giving him a pot and a wooden spoon to heat to through himself. Then he should have washed up his things.

BarbarianMum · 14/11/2013 12:56

I don't think you can say you made his lunch - chucking something in the microwave to heat up is hardly cooking is it?

As for asking you to heat it up, that makes sense to me cause you're the one who knows how it works, what strength it is etc. But I have an odd microwave that requires initiation, maybe yoursis more straightforward?

If it bothers you, tell him no. Personally I'd have no problem with it.

Mumbrage · 14/11/2013 12:57

yeh, the painter and decorator breached etiquette. this thread is so english. I love it!

Mim78 · 14/11/2013 12:57

I would have given him a pan and whatever he needed to get on with it. I would have pointed out the things he needed for his washing up. I would also have explained that we only eat in the kitchen in our house.

I don't think it's wrong of him to bring spag bol per se, but yes to expecting you to do the heating up.

If I am working from home (which I will be if I am there during the day) I do show builders etc where the tea making facilities are and any biscuits I might have rather than making it for them, because I am working too!

Original poster
PTFO · 14/11/2013 13:07

I thought it odd, all workmen previously have brought a packed lunch and eaten it in the van or gone out for lunch..

Im in the middle of something really important and I just didn't want the hassle, I felt like his bloody mother and like I say he lives only five mins away. ( im also in a bad mood!)

oh and soo important that I had time to post on mn :-)

I did heat it up then left him to it...talking to his wife on his mobile at the top of the stairs.

OP posts:
KellyElly · 14/11/2013 13:07

I haven't had workmen in my home before but at work they all bring their own tea/coffee in a flask and go out for lunch or eat in their vans. Every single one of them - and we have many contractors coming and going because of the nature of the business. They use the loo and that's it. I don't think YABU.

Original poster
PTFO · 14/11/2013 13:13

mumbrage that made me laugh! oh so VERY English.

OP posts:
KerwhizzedMyself · 14/11/2013 13:14

YANBU. But why didnt you just say no?

spindlyspindler · 14/11/2013 13:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ninilegsintheair · 14/11/2013 13:17

Is he trying to save on his gas bill perhaps by adding to yours? Grin

fluffyraggies · 14/11/2013 13:24

At least he actually works (when he's not eating).

I have 'the talking electrician' coming round in an hour. I am actually dreading it. He'll be working in two rooms of the house again and i swear to God if you go anywhere near him he starts to talk at you and doesn't draw breath for half an hour.

DH thought i was exagerating when i told him about it. DH is good at getting on with his own business and being blunt about it. Even he couldn't stem the tide of talk coming from the bloke when he was working here last.

(no choice about tradesmen - he's one of our land-lords friends Hmm) (just wonder if land-lord knows how much of his money is going towards chin wag time)

Onefewernow · 14/11/2013 13:26

I can't say I would have lost sleep over it.