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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

that a decorator should not ask

90 replies

PTFO · 14/11/2013 12:37

me to make his lunch for him then sit at the top of the stairs eating in?

Hes painting the bathroom. He asked if he could have his lunch- yes fine. He asked if I had a microwave- no I don't why do you ask? oh er could you just bung my spag bog in a pan and heat it through for me....er really its frozen solid. yes thanks...he then helped himself to a bowl and fork to add to my washing up. oh and he knew which cupboard had the bowls in straight away but he does appear to be washing said bowl up...

I might ask he lives five mins away...

OP posts:
Lilacroses · 14/11/2013 20:47

I would find that weird and annoying....the rooting about for pans would be the worst part..not sure why but I agree with you. Not a huge deal but it would put me off him!

sandfrog · 14/11/2013 20:47

YANBU. He should have brought sandwiches, not something which is going to involve using someone else's microwave, stove etc.

ICameOnTheJitney · 14/11/2013 20:49

Good God. YABU.

What kind of world do we live in when people who compared to many, have EVERYTHING and they begrudge putting someone's food in a pan??

ICameOnTheJitney · 14/11/2013 20:50

I might add...in another world...many moons away, people think of others and do kind things just because they can...it's not like he asked you to PROVIDE the food.

ICameOnTheJitney · 14/11/2013 20:51

All those saying "He should have brought sandwiches" he was probably eating leftovers from his dinner the night before. Some people HAVE to do this.

tinmug · 14/11/2013 21:05

YABU. Did you honestly, genuinely mind? Seriously? Really? Your life is intriguing.

Hairytoes · 14/11/2013 21:10

I have found that a little kindness goes a long way with tradesmen. Maybe thats why They always answer a phonecall from me on the day I ring, have been known to work on Saturdays and Sundays just to fit us in, and our plumber even popped round for a small problem that he probably could have talked us through over the phone on a bank holiday just before a family party!
My secret?
A choice of salmon and cream cheese bagels, or 'naice ham' in a fresh crusty roll from Waitrose, as many cups of Nespresso coffee as they can drink, unlimited coke to help themselves from in the fridge, loads of biscuits, and if its the weekend they get the full english breakfast (much to my DH's pleasure as well.
Win win in my book!

Rubybrazilianwax · 14/11/2013 21:28

Exactly hairytoes anyone who comes over my door is afforded every curtesy no matter who they are

TotallyBenHanscom · 14/11/2013 21:37

It's just basic human kindness isn't it? Someone is in your home, whether they are honoured guests or tradesmen, you look after them. We always offer tea, biscuits, lunch etc. And of course they're welcome to use the loo, because what is the alternative? Drive home?

It makes me sad to think that people can be offended by being asked to heat someone's lunch.

WorraLiberty · 14/11/2013 21:37

I think some people get a touch of the 'Hyacinth Bucket Bouquet' when they have work done on their homes Hmm

I often heard people taking great pleasure in moaning about the 'Tradesmen' or claiming they 'sacked' their builders.

Errr no you didn't sack them, because you were not their employer.

Hairytoes · 14/11/2013 21:38

Our carpenter even picked my washing in for me when it rained whilst I was out!!!

LineRunner · 14/11/2013 21:51

I ended up giving my builder more than a hot lunch.

Hairytoes · 14/11/2013 22:01

I do draw the line at that Shock

LimitedEditionLady · 14/11/2013 22:41

I dont think id mind that really although the builders etc i have used seem to go out or sit in their van for lunch but i wouldnt care if they sat in the kitchen tbh cos ive been lucky to have really pleasant tradesmen

Viviennemary · 14/11/2013 22:45

I suppose most people have a microwave so he probably just assumed you'd have one. But you didn't. So he couldn't eat his lunch frozen. I'm easily annoyed. Grin But on the grand scheme of things I don't think this is that bad! Though I would probably have a moan about it.

VenusDeWillendorf · 14/11/2013 23:00

Anyone I have working in my house, leaves at lunch time to sort themselves out. AND they aren't allowed to use the bathrooms - they can use their initiative.
I work from home and don't take lunch at lunch time- last thing I want is some hairy arsed electrician of plumber mooching around when I'm at work.

Most of the people who have done work for me arrive on time, and leave the place clean. I have carefully filleted the lists of trades people based on their general respectfulness, and cleanliness and if they are good time keepers. I assume they can do a good job.

We had one plumber who used all the clean laundered towels to mop up the leaks he caused by over draining the system!
An electrician who pissed on the loo seat and floor, and didn't clean it- after that no one is allowed to use the bathrooms. There are plenty of places around where they can go.
We live in a very lively town. If we were in the middle of nowhere, and there were no alternatives, I might think differently.

I leave glasses of water out on a tray so they can whet their whistles, but the kitchen is off limits.

I'm not a very hyacinth person, but cleaning up a grown mans piss was just a step too far for me.

livinginwonderland · 14/11/2013 23:41

I can't believe people don't let builders or whatever use the bathroom. That's just despicably rude in my opinion. If someone is in your home and doing work for you, the least you can do is make them a cup of tea/coffee and let them use the facilities.

If someone told me I had to drive or walk off down the road to relieve myself when there was a functional bathroom right there, I'd be quite tempted to drive off and not come back, honestly.

If someone asked to heat up their lunch, I wouldn't mind either. I probably wouldn't do it for them but I'd show them how to use the hob and tell them to help themselves to cutlery/salt/ketchup etc.

ICameOnTheJitney · 14/11/2013 23:48

Yes horribly rude! It's basic human decency to let people use the toilet or the sink....the cooker's just a step away from that and where's the issue? I think whoever said that some people have delusions of grandeur where tradespeople are concerned is right!

As for calling them "hairy arsed" Venus how on earth does the condition of their arse affect you? If it IS hairy, that doesn't mean they're LESS than you! So you work at home...big shits...so do I...that doesn't mean people can't go about their work around me and use the facilities!

WorraLiberty · 14/11/2013 23:59

I'm not a very hyacinth person, but cleaning up a grown mans piss was just a step too far for me. **

Well your post certainly makes you come across that way.

'Hairy arsed' electrician or plumber?

Someone got piss on your loo seat once and now no tradesmen may use it?

Good lord...

ICameOnTheJitney · 15/11/2013 00:22

Im surprised she lets them breathe her air.

WorraLiberty · 15/11/2013 00:26

I've got a genuine question for all those who are precious about their toilets.

What if a Midwife, Health Visitor or Doctor visiting your home asked to use the loo?

Would you rudely tell them to go elsewhere too?

fannyfireworks · 15/11/2013 01:19

Totally right Worra

fannyfireworks · 15/11/2013 01:22

On everything not just that last post

Some people on here sound like horrible human beings.

Selvedge · 15/11/2013 02:00

There is surely some middle ground here. I would let a decorator heat their leftover spag bol on my hob (if I had no microwave) on the 1st day of a job, as well as show them the washing up facilities. I would expect them to bring something that didn't require heating on subsequent days. But there is NO WAY I would let said spag bol be eaten on the landing. They are presumably trying to get extra work painting over the tomato splatters.

shrunkenhead · 15/11/2013 02:33

Some people seem really snobby about tradespeople! I have no idea why! As someone previously pointed out they'd let a midwife or doctor use the loo. I thought it was basic human kindness to let people use your toilet and to make them feel welcome with tea and biscuits. He only wanted to heat his dinner up. And prob ate it at top of stairs so as to not to be in your way. In my experience if you treat people well they do a good job, clean up after themselves etc so it's in everyone's interests to keep them sweet!