AIBU? DS was ill and the school have marked it as an unauthorised holiday and are threatening to fine me!

[WeAreEternal]

A couple of weeks ago DS (7) had an upset stomach, he D&V over night and most of the next day.
First thing in the morning (a Thursday) I called the school and let them know he was ill.
He was feeling better by the evening but as he had D&V school policy is 24 hours off, so I kept him off Friday too.

I received a letter from to school yesterday saying that those days have been marked as an unauthoried holiday as "although we received a phone call from you stating that (DS) was ill, we are led to believe that DS was in fact on a holiday to XXXX on these two dates"

The letter goes on to say that if he was genuinely ill they expect me to provide evidence such as a doctors appointment card, a prescription, a medication receipt or something simmilar that can "verify my version of events".

I am a medical professional, I know when when my DS needs medication or to see a GP or when he just has a bit of a stomach bug and needs rest and fluids.
Who would take a child to the GP or buy medication for D&V anyway?

How on earth can I prove that DS was ill?
And why are they even querying this?
AIBU to think this is bloody ridiculous?

Anyone have any ideas?

Basically your quoting fact and asking them to disclose why they are 'led to believe' your statement of fact is false.

Your offering them the chance to quantify their accusation or correct the register accordingly to match the statement of fact you gave them.

The first letter is my own house style!

Tululah the rules have been changed by this ridiculous government to say that NO absences will be authorised EVER!

Youarewinning's second letter. With 'under the freedom of information act' corrected to 'under the darts protection act'

You cannot ask for confidential information under the freedom of information act but are entitled to all personal information held about you under the data protection act.

OR the parents and child were caught together, not in school on a school day.

Whoops - I work in a school and DS is in Juniors. A cyst in my jaw burst at the weekend cracking my socket and tooth. I went to dentist this morning and was given an appointment for an hour later - so went to ASDA next door to pick up some Christmas presents. I had my DS with me as he's got tonilitis and on penicillin still.

data protection act. No idea about the darts protection act....

yes DPA. I couldn't remember what the letters stood for! Thankyou.

Fruedian slip yellow imagining throwing then at the HT of eternals DS school!

I went into the office after dropping DS off. I asked to speak to someone, said I was happy to wait, but was told I needed to phone or make an appointment if I really felt that I need to see someone. The earliest appointment she could offer me is Wednesday! She then made a sarcastic comment about how I should just phone as she told me to on Friday. (Except I did call Friday and nobody called me back!) So I left the office and phoned, to be told that the person is unavailable at present and will have to call me back. So we shall see if that happens

So stand in front of her and call on your mobile and when they say someone will call back put the phone down and say 'I have, now before I call the local papers, I expect to be seen by the head in the next 30 minutes', plonk yourself on the seats and wait it out. Then call the local papers after 30 minutes.

I don't think inviting the OP to escalate the situation and engineer confrontations is good advice. This is not an emergency, though it is wrong and annoying and being accused of dishonesty (which is what this claim of holidaying amounts to) must really smart.

The OP can write and deliver a letter stating the allegation is wrong and asking for an explanation. The ball is then in the school's court and she can wait for them to respond.

We all need to bear in mind this is where her son goes to school, so turning this into a battle royal is something she may not want to do.

Thank you all so much for some fab advice (as always)

youarewinning I love it and I think you have done a fantasic job with that letter and I am going to C&P it. Thank you.

I have not have my phone call returned yet. I am going to call again shortly.

They sound like they want you to leave it either because they know they have messed up and want to forget it, or because they don't like to be challenged.

We have had to try 3 times to speak to someone at DCs school and even then it only brought a pointless email.

I really can't wait until my children leave school.

I know it's not a good idea to escalate it but the Daily Fail would LOVE this story. Just sayin'

could I make the suggestion that when writing your letter, the phrase Diarrohea and Vomiting should be followed by 'a common, self limiting childhood illness' and a quote of the guidance available on NHS choices, www.nhs.uk/Conditions/Rotavirus-gastroenteritis/Pages/Introduction.aspx#close as to management and when to seek GP advice, and their own policy www.ace-ed.org.uk/advice-about-education-for-parents/School_Attendance on parental certification for short periods of illness plus a quote of the schools own guidance and policy - eg you followed advice for a common self limiting condition to the letter and so will not be providing any doctors appointment card, a prescription, a medication receipt or wasting a GP appointment for some retrospective GANFYD which would prove nothing and have no purpose than to satisfy their draconian paperwork.

and then give them both barrels on how dare you accuse or insinuate me of lying, demand to all see evidence that leads them to believe you were on holiday, times dates, proofs if they have any, their full sickness/leave policy, and who exactly assessed the evidence/made the decision to/takes responsibility for making this accusation so that you can take legal action. As a doctor, someone questioning your probity is a serious matter!

cc in to governors/ht/mp and anyone else who takes your fancy.

I agree with the idea for a Mumsnet campaign - its one thing to try and deal with problem truancy, its another to create an entirely inflexible system which takes out common sense, compassion and makes even certifying your child as sick into an adversarial process
Should have a thread to collect peoples stories on this matter.

If a school accused me of lying and then did not take it seriously when asked to explain why they thought it, I would be furious. I do not think the secretary actually appreciates the seriousness of being called a liar. The head can always make time to ring you up or see you. That's what a Head is paid for.

I would log your precise history of trying to deal with it and what you have been told. eg. Friday in office, told to call school. Friday 11am, called school, but'relevant person' out, explained problem, told would get call back. Friday pm. No call back. Etc. etc. exactly what you have done and been told.

Introduction should be exactly what happened with your ds and how you treated it. Part 2 d and v advice. Part 3, you are not happy. Part 4. Log of what had occurred in communication with school since then.

Write to the school with and ask them to explain their letter. Your child was sick & you complied with nhs guidance to keep him at home. You weren't on holiday as they suggest and require an apology on this accusation. If the school continues to harass you with untrue allegations you will be forced to take legal action.

My youngest has just started school and has picked up every bug going :(
Since sept he has had;
A sickness and high temp bug (most of his class got this)
A chest infection
Tonsilitis
And he is off today with another sickness bug, he should be back tomorrow if he does not vomit again.
As a parent, what on earth are we supposed to do?
I have just had to take my ds to my mothers as I had to take her for an appt.
I am sure if anyone saw us they would wonder why he was off but I am simply following school and NICE guidleines.
You can't win it seems....
Op...the school know they haven't got a leg to stand on, hence the reluctance to talk to you.
Perhaps you ought to contact your local radio/tv station about this?
It's insane!

youretoastmildred - you must be a lawyer!

No problems - Eternal But I would say either call again and then update letter with outcome of that before you send it OR just send letter. Once it's sent you have to let them contact you and inform them it has to be in writing. This needs a papertrail as they are making a very serious and unsubstanciated allegation.

Winnings letter is awesome! I had a school accuse me of lying once and it was hideous (they Haag made admin error but refused to admit. I was in tears and I don't cry easily. When I wrote to complain I did also include that the implication I was lying was unfair, unprofessional and slanderous.

I hope we find out the proof they have about the OP being on holiday. If DS was asked, he could definitely come up with an imaginative holiday. But it might not be true.

If my DS was asked what he did when off today he would say - went to ASDA and Mc Donalds! He did, but ASDA next door to where I had emergency dental appointment and we visited on hours wait and Mc Donalds is next to ASDA and we drove through on the way home as he was starving

Thing is I have proof of visiting dentist and proof of the fact he's ill. (been off since and including Thursday with tontilitis and on penicillin. Ate for the first time last night since Wednesday lunchtime.)

I find all this "prove you were at home" a little heavy handed. On reflection of this even if the OP had visited family that day at X place she was following policy of keeping a child home from public places and school.

Bit of a pointless rant but was more on response to the poster who said they can follow up absence if the child is seen in public with parents when they are off school ill. (I'm agreeing it's daft btw - not arguing with the poster - and sorry I can't remember who it was that posted it )

Bloody hell! [shocked] if be taking this to my MP. Bloody outrageous that they call you a liar and then refuse to discuss it with you.

If = I'd