To worry about this child asleep in car

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There's a child about 2years old asleep in a car (in car seat) on road near my work (quietish residential street). I've been here about 10 minutes and no one has come back for him. Might be overreacting but would never leave my son asleep in car for more than a minute or two. Don't know what to do, should I report it?? Just concerned maybe he's been forgotten about, after reading some stories where this happened, and worried for the little thing

This happens in Clapham? But it's such a naice area!

We leave DS in the car when he's asleep sometimes. But we sit in it with him, easier as we have a driveway. I've perfected the art of getting him out and into his cot now, mind.

I agree Seasick.

Arrogance and a 'it would never happen to me' attitude have no place when you supposedly are caring for a young child.

I am not a hysterical parent. Not by a long shot. I risk assess sensibly, measured against the potential gain in the situation.

Leaving a child in the car with all the risks that entails (minimal I grant you but risks none the less) - not worth the ten extra minutes of peace IMO.

Of course statistically we know children are more at risk unsupervised in their own cots/bedrooms than left strapped into a carseat in november.

So presumably everyone sits up all night at their DC's bedside? And if you don't, well haven't you considered the danger!?

Eh? It's a lot easier for someone to spot/take a child from a car than from a bedroom two floors up, probably listening on a good monitor, if it's a toddler we are talking about. Not that I think that was the main risk here, not at all, but I don't really get that logic

The windows were broken and there was debris inside the car. It would have been serious cuts minimum.

There are productive risks that you have to take because they have to be taken in order for them to grow up. Things like playing out, walking to school on their own or catching a bus or train alone.

But being to lazy to deal with a grizzly toddler or too selfish to sacrifice the quiet while they're sleeping is just lazy and selfish. You can either carry them to their cot or wake them up. At the end of the day this is a risk people take because their own convenience is more important to them.

It's hardly wrapping them up in cotton wool or refusing to let them date until they're 25. It's a matter of thinking if the risk you're taking is worth the benefits it gives. I don't think it's a risk people would take unless they're more concerned with convenience than safety.

Keeping the only arrogance I can detect is in your answers.

Presumably people have monitors to alert them to noises in their young children's rooms and assess when they are sensible/safe enough to call their parents, or take a short walk, indoors to find them.

Rather different than being in a car alone, possibly not supervised that well if OP was able to watch the car for that time before the parent appeared.

I never left mine asleep in the car. Didn't seem right unless I was watching it all the time and I couldn't be arsed doing that, when I could be inside cuddling my sleepy baby on the sofa. I just wouldn't have liked my kids to have woken up in a car and find themselves alone and not know when their mum is coming to get them. It must be horrible. I don't want my child to get to the stage where they are so frightened that they start crying and shouting "mummy! Mummy! Where are you?" People on this thread can argue "but they're not in any danger and if you check on them every 10 mins then they can't be crying for long." Well, that could be 10 mins of frightened crying, then, if they wake up immediately after you last checked them. It just goes against every motherly instinct I have to risk that happening, actually.

My mum regularly left my sister's toddler on her steep path, not not even in full view of a window. You had to crane your neck to see the car. She thought it was fine to check every so often. Personally I used to cringe when I witnessed it and thought it was cruel, and yes, too much of a risk as it was a steep hill.

if you leave your car on the road and not on your path then it's even more of a risk - I know of about 3 people who have had their parked car damaged by another passing/reversing car.

I will never understand the blasé people who think it's fine as it's such a tiny risk of these things happening. and it's as if an upset and frightened baby is not an issue if they are physically ok.

You did the right thing Op. Ignore the assholes.

harticus

Iam wondering why so many people choose to ignore the fact that leaving kids in cars leaves them open to prosecution?

No copper is going to give a tinker's fart that "MN said it was ok so ....."

If that's the level the police have descended to it's best to ignore them.

DoctorRobert

And on what planet would that scenario be okay? Child upset and bruised whilst parent is indoors, unharmed and possibly oblivious? WTF?

There's a world of difference between it being 'OK' and it being THE END OF THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE and a reason never to leave a child in a car asleep. That's the point I'm making. There's no proportionality to reaction. Yes, the handbrake MIGHT fail. Or it might not. Or the house the baby's asleep in MIGHT burn down. Or it might not.

Gauging risk. That's the point here.

jacks365

Flatpack a serious question how would you react if someone was obviously paying close attention to your car when you child was in it asleep?

I'd go outside and see what they were up to. In a friendly sort of way. And if they said they'd called the police on me for letting my little one sleep in the car I'd go spare.

Christ almighty, what's happened to MN lately?

The OP very sensibly, helpfully and kind citizen-ly wondered what she should do when she saw a young child sleeping alone in a car. Yes, it was probably fine, but does everyone really want to live in a world where people will see a young child alone in any way and just shrug it off and say 'not my problem'?!

flatpackhamster what if the same parent saw me hanging round the car and called the police on me for acting suspiciously? I'm glad I had a phonecall logged already.

That was a great and sensible post, Seasick Sal. Yes, it IS done for the parent's convenience, in my opinion.

Problem is that this mother didn't flatpack. It took 15 mins before the mother came out "from up the road" I do agree that there isn't an issue with leaving a child directly outside your house and keeping an eye on them carefully but that wasn't the case here so yes I think ringing the non emergency number was the correct course.

At the point the OP made her initial post she had observed the child asleep in the car for 10 minutes.

The first responses were to phone 999.

That is the huge overreaction that people are talking about. Not go out and check if anyone is around, is the child distressed, has she/he been abandoned. Just call the police.

Oh Fgs op, I leave ds asleep in front of house in car asleep. What's the problem?

Sure the police lived you

The thing with MN is with these things you always get extremes of opinion. There are those over the top people crying "dial 999 immediately!" And there is the other extreme of "so what if the child pukes/cries because it is scared and alone/gets bumped into by a passing car - it's strapped in a car seat so there would be no serious damage to health." Etc etc.

I do think there is common sense lacking at both ends of the spectrum.

Downton

Is anyone around: no
Is child distressed: no
Has she been abandoned: how would I know?

Then what? Knock on doors? I've already explained my reluctance to do so. Hang around in the rain observing some more? No, why should I? I had to make a call, even if it was just so I could go back to work ASAP with a clear conscience, and unfortunately only way to do that was to call police

Sooo opinions on this.
I am a single mum to toddler. If we go shopping, she falls asleep on the way home, do I
a: take the shopping in 1st put freezer bits away then go get her and cuddle on the sofa while she comes round.
B:take her in 1st, leave her in the house alone whilst I get the shopping?

She will be alone. Is she safer sleeping in the locked car strapped in or free to get to whatever she wants alone in the house?

(Let's assume it is an overcast, rainy day approx 12c)

My post reads wrong. What I mean is the OPs post was sensible. The immediate responses weren't.

I can't believe the over reaction on here! Yes seasicksal, it is for my convience, nothing to do with ds waking up when moved and not getting enough sleep.

comemulledwine read the thread, police took seriously and told me they would send someone straight away

You sound bloody lovely, Seasicksal. A mother has watched her child be killed this week, and you are making snide, judgey comments over the Internet!