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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

I probably am being unreasonable...school Christmas cards...

88 replies

ICameOnTheJitney · 04/11/2013 22:39

Two forms came home today...one with each child of mine. A sample card came with each...designed by DDs....five pounds a pack of 12 cards...all the same design obviously...designed by the kids....money due in this Friday.

See...I love my DC artwork but this is obviously teacher led...so it's not got much of their personality in it at all....but both DDs are excited to get their pack of cards. That's a tenner which for me, at short notice is not simple.

I am on a tight budget....AIBU to think that this is a kind of emotional blackmail that schools should not indulge in? 300 kids...all paying a fiver each...that's a nice profit isn't it? I volunteer, give my time when I can...to raise money....I resent being pressed to buy these cards...I know I don't HAVE to...but my children will be disappointed won't they? Or think I don't like their efforts. I wouldn';t have minded so much if they'd given me another week to pay but the cash MUST be in for Friday or no cards.

OP posts:

Original poster

ICameOnTheJitney · 04/11/2013 22:40

Also I've already BOUGHT my cards for this year!! So these are going where? My cards are gorgeous...I was pleased to find them and now look...I'll feel I have to send the DCs cards or the money's wasted!

OP posts:

Leeds2 · 04/11/2013 22:41

I would be hacked off too.

Sirzy · 04/11/2013 22:42

Well just say no then! tell the children they can make their own cards at home to send to people instead

FunnysInLaJardin · 04/11/2013 22:42

yabu it's just one of those things you have to do. BTW our cards came home tonight so your school is very late doing them!

jay55 · 04/11/2013 22:43

Ask your kids to make some more at home and coo over them.

InMySpareTime · 04/11/2013 22:44

I kept the "artwork" and sent nothing back. My DCs design and make their cards individually. I feel no guilt at avoiding the school's extortionate schemes, there's no way I'm spending that much on cards that represent so little child input.

Original poster

ICameOnTheJitney · 04/11/2013 22:44

They won't buy it! I could say make some at home...they'd ask about the cards from school. I know I could say "I can't afford it" but who wants to say that to a 5 year old?

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Ifcatshadthumbs · 04/11/2013 22:45

I think sending you are sample card they have already done is a bit sneaky. We get sent home a sheet for them to do their design on and send back if we want cards. Far easier to to say no to. (Have never got ds's to do the Christmas cards)

Sirzy · 04/11/2013 22:45

You might not want to say it but if you can't afford it then your pretty daft if you don't! Really it won't harm them to be told no!

JessicaBeatriceFletcher · 04/11/2013 22:46

Funnys - why on earth is this something you HAVE to do? Ridiculous. Grown adults. If you don't want something or can't afford something, you don't do something. In this case, you explain to the DCs why. Of course you don't HAVE to buy them.

May09Bump · 04/11/2013 22:47

That is such a bad way of doing it - our school sent home a pack for the children to complete in school bags (so individual work) and it was an option to send the pack back by a particular date - so you could opt out easily.

You would think that they would be more aware of the money concerns some parents face.

InMySpareTime · 04/11/2013 22:48

We've been known to "lose" either the artwork or the form, or be unable to find chequebook/pen/card until after the deadline.
They get over it surprisingly quickly, as with all school "fundraising" rip-offs.
You'll soon become jaded and guilt-free like the rest of us...

Original poster

ICameOnTheJitney · 04/11/2013 22:48

The DDs will be sad though...when their friends get their cards and they get none. I don't like the idea behind it all...it's not like we're talking about a frigging pony...I could say "No they're too much" about something like that but a pack of cards? Seems awful.

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JessicaBeatriceFletcher · 04/11/2013 22:50

ICame - they'll get over it. It's good for kids to learn that sometimes we can't always get what we want; that everything costs money and sometimes we can't afford things. There's enough going on at Christmas that I really don't think they will mind for very long (if they mind at all)

UniS · 04/11/2013 22:50

naw, just "forget" the form on Friday and it will be " too late" by Monday.

Worked for me last year. this year his picture was recogniseable so I did buy a pack. The grandparents like them

NormanTheForeman · 04/11/2013 22:53

Our school did these a few weeks ago. You don't have to order them. But for our school it made over £400 of profit for the PTA to buy stuff that wouldn't be available for the school otherwise. I organised this project, and it took me several hours of my time to co-ordinate the orders and payments. I was perfectly happy to do this, but it's quite hard when you have given your time to organise and administrate a project like this for the benefit of the school, to be told that you feel pressed into it. The reason that one class's designs will all be similar is that the teacher will have had to come up with something fairly simple which all children in the class can have a go at doing. The exception might be the older children.

I know that in our school, the uptake rate was high, but there wasn't a great deal of pressure on the parents. Our cards look likely to be delivered to the school in the next couple of days. My job will be to go in, double check and collate all the orders, and distribute them to the classes. This is entirely voluntary, but will take the whole afternoon (I know this as I did it last year!) So please don't be too hard on the volunteers who run these projects for the benefit of your school!

lizzzyyliveson · 04/11/2013 22:53

I would show them the £10 note and say, 'you can have your cards or we can spend this on,' and then list what treats you could afford for the money. Let them choose.

Original poster

ICameOnTheJitney · 04/11/2013 22:55

Norman why can't the children do their own designs? Mine can...they'd be much better than this stuff. Also, I never mentioned the frigging volunteers....I volunteer myself thanks very much.

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Canthisonebeused · 04/11/2013 22:55

My dd has done hers T school. It is so obviously her own work. Last year it was sent home and we did it together. This year they done them in class. Both definitely had dds stamp on it. If your not happy don't buy them.

Original poster

ICameOnTheJitney · 04/11/2013 22:55

lizzie all due respect but the "treats" of which you speak will in fact be bills! If the money was for treats then I would call the cards that!

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Retropear · 04/11/2013 22:57

Yanbu

I have 3 dc and only bought 1 pack as 2 were shite.£15 for 12 cards I can actually send.I don't think so.

One year we got ours after the overseas last post date.Was not a happy hector.

Hate school rip off schemes.

NormanTheForeman · 04/11/2013 22:58

They can do their own designs. There is always the option to collect extra art templates from the school office and design your own (this is open to children from the school who want to do different designs, or for younger siblings etc who want to take part). We did this one year, when ds didn't like the "class design" but wanted to do his own. It was very flexible.

bumblebeader · 04/11/2013 23:00

If it makes you feel any better about saying no, our school did these and the profit for the school was only about a quid per pack.

Original poster

ICameOnTheJitney · 04/11/2013 23:00

Well that's in your school Norman...DD assured me that they all had to do the same one. She's 9...and knows what she's talking about.

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lizzzyyliveson · 04/11/2013 23:02

My point is that if you are going to get a tenner out of your purse and waste it on these cards then you would be better off saying no and taking the kids swimming.

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