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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To refuse to allow....

33 replies

lemonstarfuckertree · 30/10/2013 14:59

DS1 15 and DS2 12 to go 'trick or treating' with a gang of mates tomorrow?

For me Hallowe'en is for primary school age kids.. getting dressed up and wandering about locally, for 1/2 hr or so.

The idea of DS 1 who is HUGE and DS2 who is 5'5" and looks older and their mates banging on peoples doors asking for sweets with (implied) threats... NO. Its harassment and bullying.

DS1 is ok with the ban but DS2 is having a major strop.... so AIBU

OP posts:
xCupidStuntx · 30/10/2013 15:01

Why would a 15 year old even want to go trick or treating? YANBU

Wishfulmakeupping · 30/10/2013 15:06

Yanbu we had trick or treaters last year that must have been 15/16 I felt quite intimidated and I don't scare easy. Good for you for telling the no

Wishfulmakeupping · 30/10/2013 15:06

them no

YouStayClassySanDiego · 30/10/2013 15:10

No, stick to your guns.

DidoTheDodo · 30/10/2013 15:15

YANBU. They're too old. well done for saying no.
I don't think I'd be best please if a group of teenagers turned up on my doorstep demanding treats, regardless of the circumstances.

Nanny0gg · 30/10/2013 15:16

Well done lemonstarfuckertree

If more parents were like you I wouldn't have to barricade the garden and switch of all the lights at the front for the evening.

catinboots · 30/10/2013 15:18

YANBU

I stopped DS1 T&Ting at 11.

Who wants a mob of teenage boys hammering on their door, asking for shit?

Scary and threatening IMHO

BoneyBackJefferson · 30/10/2013 15:18

Two years ago we had a group of thirty 15 - 18 yr. olds "trick or treating" wearing scream masks.

that's got to be intimidating for anybody.

Angelina77 · 30/10/2013 15:20

I used to go 'halloweening' with my little brother at 15 and we used to ask for money! Long time ago in Teesside mind you. We had a little song called 'have you got a penny for Halloween', how scroungey is that? Everyone did it though.

Fwiw, I think you should let them go.

sweetheart · 30/10/2013 15:26

My dd is 13 - I've told her she can go trick or treating if she meets 2 criteria:-

  1. She dresses up properly - not a half arsed attempt
  2. She takes her little brother with her (he is 8) because she is too old to go without small children.

I agree with you - I wouldn't allow my kids in the scenario you are facing.

BeScarefulWhatYouWitchFor · 30/10/2013 15:28

I wouldn't appreciate having a gang of teenagers knocking on my door either. YANBU

fluffyraggies · 30/10/2013 15:33

I think 10 or 11 is the upper age limit for T&Ting. After that it could be seen as quite intimidating for some.

(when i lived in west London we had 6ft trick or treaters in black hoodies knocking at 8 and 9 at night. scary. if you didnt answer the door and give them something you would get punished :( eggs, flour, paint up the door. bins emptied out and kicked about over the lawn etc)

cakebar · 30/10/2013 15:35

I'm with the others. They are too old. Do you know anybody with little ones that they could take out?

Jolleigh · 30/10/2013 15:54

YANBU OP. Gangs of teenagers are the precise reason I no longer open the door. I used to love giving treats to the small children too Sad

lizzzyyliveson · 30/10/2013 15:57

Why not let your boys and their friends have a Halloween party at your place? They could watch a themed film and have appropriate snacks and get to answer the door to trick or treaters themselves. They might enjoy being on the other side of the equation now, with a big bag of goodies to dish out to little ones.

FruitSaladIsNotPudding · 30/10/2013 15:59

I would laugh at them if they turned up at my door. Why on earth would teenagers want to go trick or treating, it's for little kids isn't it?

elcranko · 30/10/2013 16:16

YANBU, they're too old IMHO. Lots of people I've spoken to about this subject no longer open the door on Halloween because the majority of the trick or treaters seem to be gangs of teenagers. They're spoiling it off the little children who genuinely enjoy it. Well done for saying no.

elcranko · 30/10/2013 16:17

FOR, not OFF

teenagetantrums · 30/10/2013 16:39

Well i wouldn't mind if they turned up at my door as long as they were dressed up, if they are children why cant they do trick or treating? but then i have teenagers and i don't find 'groups' of them intimidating.

Original poster
lemonstarfuckertree · 30/10/2013 16:42

Thank you. I'm happy for DS3 (8) to go out with his friends (and will go with them to supervise) but I wouldn't answer the door to a bunch of marauding teenagers - and I think its awful the way they expect to be given sweets.... FFS....DS2 was talking about wanting a pillowcase to collect all his 'loot' ....

OP posts:
usualsuspect · 30/10/2013 16:45

I think they are too old for trick or treating.

But stop with the gangs of scarey teenager posts.

Teenagers are not scary

farrowandbawl · 30/10/2013 16:46

Well done for saying no.

usualsuspect · 30/10/2013 16:49

It's not harassment and bullying either.

MN really doesn't like teenagers.

Sad
Original poster
lemonstarfuckertree · 30/10/2013 17:00

I love teenagers. Just not in big groups, at night, knocking on doors and asking for sweets. I don't like adults in this context either, or grannies [thismile]

OP posts:
YesterdayI · 30/10/2013 17:06

I think it's way too old at 15 and a bit too old at 12. Trick or treating should be for little kids.