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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think the midwife will not give two hoots about my bikini line?

337 replies

IneedAsockamnesty · 18/10/2013 22:02

I'm going into hospital in just over a week to be induced, I can not see my bikini line and am disinclined to brandish a razor and any sharp bladed object near something I cannot see.

So will the midwife even notice let alone care?

OP posts:

samithesausage · 18/10/2013 23:21

During the stitching up (vaginal birth) after having ds1, the midwife said "you shave, you don't have to shave anymore, we don't believe in it!"
The dr looked up from my fanjo and said "ah yes, but we prefer it because it's easier for us to stitch!"

DaleyBump · 18/10/2013 23:21

I'm not a midwife but I am a student nurse and I can genuinely say that I've not paid the slightest bit of attention to anyone's pubic hair. I have seen uncountable numbers of fanjos and willies and I honestly can't remember specifically a single one. Don't worry about it, just go with however you feel comfortable :)

TondelayoSchwarzkopf · 18/10/2013 23:22

I couldn't shave. So itchy when growing back. Waxing or nowt.

Also so [shocked] at the poor lady who cut her flaps.

BIWI · 18/10/2013 23:27

"Yes, TombRaiding, if you're in your 30s or older, when your Mum gave birth they would have shaved her, they also gave you an enema when you were in early labour (yes really)."

I'm 54, and it definitely wasn't the case that you were shaved and given an enema when giving birth!

I hate the way people talk about being 'tidy'. It's a natural thing to have pubic hair, for goodness sake.

Just focus on having your baby and enjoying the experience, and stop worrying about it.

DaleyBump · 18/10/2013 23:29

Oh, also, if you do want to tidy up, I would recommend a trim. You don't want to have to worry about ingrown hairs if you have an open wound (infection risk) or scratching down below when you're incredibly tender.

SPsTombRaidingWithCliff · 18/10/2013 23:31

She told.me this 4 year ago! She told me this as apparently she fell for it when pregnant with me 23 year ago

ebwy · 18/10/2013 23:43

I refuse to shave legs or "tidy" my pubes. If someone judges me on that, then it's their problem not mine.

twice I've had caesarians, and the 2 hospitals wanted different things.
the first hospital shaved the bit they needed hairless.
the second hospital told me to shave and had no answer to "can't see or reach there!" so I got my partner to do it,which he did but he also shaved a smiley face in the rest of my pubes.

I've never had any comments about my hairy limbs or the pubes in hospital

Original poster

IneedAsockamnesty · 18/10/2013 23:47

The itchiness would bother me as well.

I'm not worried about it im not going to cover it in glitter or anything i was just wondering people's viewpoints on the matter

OP posts:

RubyGoat · 19/10/2013 00:01

Ha. I don't think the midwives cared that I'd not shaved. By the time I went into labour I was retaining so much water I couldn't reach much past my own knees, so shaving my lower legs was right out! Ironically, while I was labouring, they gave me some sexy compression stockings which covered my hairy calves so that was one less thing for me to worry about. And I shouldn't imagine any of them noticed my unshaven lady garden either. Just the giant baby coming out of it!

grobagsforever · 19/10/2013 00:04

God this thread is depressing. You are giving birth. Why the hell should you do anything to your perfectly natural hair? Why oh why do women accept this kind sexist crap still??

Bunbaker · 19/10/2013 00:05

"They don't care to your face but they do sometimes have a good giggle behind the door..."

That is a horrible thing to say. We aren't all porn stars you know.

Coupon · 19/10/2013 00:09

A lot of people don't shave ever, let alone during pregnancy or labour so I'd be surprised if natural hair growth would cause medical professionals to ''have a giggle".

Exactly. It's completely normal.

Bunbaker · 19/10/2013 00:14

"Could your partner not shave you?"

I find the idea of OH administering something so personal utterly gross. Does your husband get a kick out of doing this?

"I hate the way people talk about being 'tidy'. It's a natural thing to have pubic hair, for goodness sake"

I'm the same age as you and I agree with you. When I was young no-one shaved. It is only since I joined MN that I discovered this strange custom phenomenon.

DaleyBump · 19/10/2013 00:17

I don't shave but I do trim for comfort and I will do before I go into hospital to have my DS. Not for how it looks but purely because I don't want the extra hassle of blood mixed with pubes to deal with.

HungryHorace · 19/10/2013 00:20

My friend's a midwife and she told me not to worry about 'tidy' pubes. She said they were more worried about minging feet or nits (like one of her patients had and neglected to tell them!).

Morloth · 19/10/2013 00:20

I have had 2 babies and never removed any hair. No comments.

It is just hair.

TwelveLeggedWalk · 19/10/2013 00:22

I wouldn't care about appearances, but having had a crash CS with my public line dry shaved by a slightly stressed midwife with a crappy basic Bic, I would, with hindsight, have gone for a nice wax beforehand.

CS healing is bad enough without oh-my-fucking-god-thats-itchy pubes growing back!

Original poster

IneedAsockamnesty · 19/10/2013 00:26

Why exactly is this thread depressing to you?

Its entitled the midwife won't give two hoots, most posters have agreed that they won't

OP posts:

missismac · 19/10/2013 00:29

I'm a student midwife just starting my 2nd year. This;

"They don't care to your face but they do sometimes have a good giggle behind the door..."

...is utter tripe and nonsense, at least it is at the hospital I'm placed at (big city one). I have NEVER EVER seen/heard this. Why on earth would anyone think Midwives would giggle about whether or not you've shaved? Apart from being totally unprofessional it's not of the slightest interest to us. Now covering it glitter sockreturningpixie - that would give us something to smile about, but with you, not with each other, and never behind any door.

zzzzz · 19/10/2013 00:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PosyNarker · 19/10/2013 00:32

Only on Mumsnet. Seriously. I shave my legs / pits and maintain my eyebrows / lashes.

pigsDOfly · 19/10/2013 00:32

Well BIWI I'm in my 60s and trust me, when I was having my babies 30 plus years ago it was very much the norm to be shaved and have an enema. So if TombRaiding is in her 30s and her Mum gave birth in this country in hospital her Mum would have been through the same thing.

RubyGoat · 19/10/2013 00:34

GroBags why depressing?

FWIW, I often don't shave in winter. DH doesn't care & I don't nag him to shave his beard much. We both have sensitive skin. I only shave in summer so I can wear skirts TBH.

Shaky · 19/10/2013 00:40

I am a midwife and I can categorically say that I do NOT give a shiny shite about the length of a woman's pubic hair.

Midwives DO NOT snigger behind doors about their patients, that would be uncouth, unprofessional and downright bloody rude.

I remember trying to shave my legs at 37 wks pregnant, it was like a scene from Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

Ericaequites · 19/10/2013 03:39

Midwives and nurses have seen many, many muffs. If you are well washed, they don't care. They have seen everything.

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