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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to post a photo of my own child taken at a school assembly on FB?

91 replies

Tinklewinkle · 14/10/2013 09:22

I'm not the world's most prolific Facebook user, I've got about 40 friends on there at most, I live away from my family so I mainly use it so my parents can keep up with what my children up to

I took DD to school this morning and got a telling off as it had been reported to the head that I had posted a picture on Facebook that was taken at school. I couldn't think of any pics that I had on FB that they could possibly be talking about but apologised and said I'd take it down.

Since getting back home I've trawled through my pics, and DH's pics to remove the photo but there's only 1 that we have on there that was taken at school and it is only of my own daughter.

My youngest daughter won an award at school a couple of weeks ago and I took a photo of her with the award at school. I cropped it before posting it so there was no one else in it - you can just about make out a bit of the shoulder of the child she's standing next to in one corner and you can see the wall of the school hall behind her (just a plain brick wall). No faces or anything, you can't even see the uniform logo on her jumper as she's holding up her certificate in front of her and it covers the logo

Now, I have never, and would never post pics with other children in on FB, but my own child?

OP posts:
friday16 · 14/10/2013 09:55

they remind you the photos are for private use, but you are posting on facebook

Define "private use".

Would it include, say, incorporating into a Christmas round-robin letter? Displaying on your mantlepiece when you have friends around to dinner? Showing to your mother's friend Flo who she sees at Bingo? What?

don't be surprised when the use of cameras gets banned....

And don't be surprised when a school that tries that ends up looking like absolute idiots. In 2013 it's completely, utterly unenforceable, and if there are children such that all that is keeping them from harm is that they should never be photographed then the entire means by which they are protected needs to be rethought. How many children today are photographing their friends and posting the results on Instagram/Twitter/FB? Oh, I know, "almost all of them".

YoureBeingADick · 14/10/2013 09:56

"I have pictures from assembly of just dd with logo showing on her cardi, how is that different to me taking a picture out of school in uniform?"

Confused

umm- do you really need someone to explain how it is different?

KatyPutTheCuttleOn · 14/10/2013 09:58

DC's school have an agreement that we will not post pictures taken in school on FB or other social networks. I doubt they would do anything if it was only your own child, however I can see why they could.
Say that my DC has a friend who is 'looked after' and I post a picture of DC at school and therefore in uniform. People who are friends with me could then assume that the friend is at the same school and maybe they are people who should not know that the 'looked after' child is a pupil there. Highly unlikely to cause a problem of course but I expect that is the reason.

KatyPutTheCuttleOn · 14/10/2013 09:58

Oh, and if I use any photos of my DC in uniform then I use photo software to swirl the logo so it's not legible.

YoureBeingADick · 14/10/2013 09:59

" In 2013 it's completely, utterly unenforceable, "

how do they manage it in swimming pools or art galleries then? they just put up very clear signs that cameras are not permitted and people oblige.

Feminine · 14/10/2013 10:00

you I'd like that explained. I can't see any difference?

op of course you are not being unreasonable!

Feminine · 14/10/2013 10:01

If it is your ^own* child with a bit of school brick in the background, how on earth can it possibly be an issue?

YoureBeingADick · 14/10/2013 10:03

you cant see a difference between taking a photo of your child in assembly with school logo visible and taking a photo of them out of school with no logo on?

LittleBairn · 14/10/2013 10:03

YANBU no other child was in the photo, the head has no right to interfer with what you do with photos of your own child.

YoureBeingADick · 14/10/2013 10:05

ah I've misread "me taking a picture out of school in uniform?" as out of school uniform

my apologies.

PatoBanton · 14/10/2013 10:07

I'm not sure why the school would be so particular about photos not involving other children - perhaps that is easier for them than being more specific. Ask them.

I object to photos and footage of MY child being shared online - either by the school or by other parents, but I guess that's hard to police anyway.

Our new HT has decided that the school will share these photos on its own facebook page now unless we object (which I have) so I very much doubt they will continue to ask parents not to share photos etc.

It is troubling as there are children at risk - I know a family who adopted and the birth family don't know the child's location so you can see this would be an issue. It is VERY easy to find people on the net and photos of kids in school are a massive giveaway.

BackOnlyBriefly · 14/10/2013 10:09

The only way to keep everyone happy is to require all children to have their faces covered 24/7.

Or we could just look into free therapy for the paranoia

thebody · 14/10/2013 10:09

I would phone the head to tell them that pictures of your child only are involved and stop being a twat, but politely.

how ridiculous.

PatoBanton · 14/10/2013 10:09

I forgot to say, I would never object to a photo of YOUR child alone on the net. That is your business entirely.

TheBigJessie · 14/10/2013 10:12

Friday16 I was addressing PervCat's claim that the whole child preotection argument is flawed

^there was a guardian thing on it here
www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2012/jun/23/photos-children-school-ban^

I have already stated my opinion that the OP is YANBU. However, I also start by my opinion that the article PervCat linked to is flawed strawmanning.

PatoBanton · 14/10/2013 10:12

Free therapy for the paranoi[d]?

That's lovely.

FortyDoorsToNowhere · 14/10/2013 10:13

I could see the point if there was other children but a picture of you own child even if it did have a logo on I don't see the issue.

harticus · 14/10/2013 10:15

My DS's primary school is forever piling images of the children onto their website.
That is because we have all had to approve or reject a disclaimer affording permission to use images of our DCs.
There is a robust system in place - unlike random photos taken by parents at assemblies etc.
Unless the person taking the pix gets approval from the guardian of every child depicted then they are on dodgy ground if they start posting images online without consent.

In this instance it seems a bit OTT but those are the school rules and you have to stick with it otherwise everyone will start bending them to suit their needs.

friday16 · 14/10/2013 10:15

how do they manage it in swimming pools or art galleries then? they just put up very clear signs that cameras are not permitted and people oblige.

How well is the "pupils will not use mobile phones during school hours" policy working at your local secondary?

TheBigJessie · 14/10/2013 10:15

*NBU that should be.

PatoBanton · 14/10/2013 10:18

Harticus, actually that is a good point - if parents can see photos online anyway, they're possibly less likely to take their own images which are then not controlled.

I object to facebook owning images of me, my children etc not for paranoid reasons but because I think facebook is shit, and I don't want them to have the rights to anything if I can help it.

iwantanafternoonnap · 14/10/2013 10:21

They put photo's of the kids at school in local newspapers so I can't see this being any different to facebook.

All a fuss about nothing if you ask me. YANBU

PatoBanton · 14/10/2013 10:23

They don't include the children whose parents don't want them in the paper though.

There is a fuss for a good reason in some cases.

Tinklewinkle · 14/10/2013 10:24

We signed a disclaimer regarding the school using photos of our kids online/in the local press - there are loads of pics of my kids in uniform, in school on their website/local paper/the school FB page.

I know, absolutely, that in this case there are no child protection issues.

Having had a dig around, the school's policy on social media is that you may post photos taken on school premises on FB/etc if you have the permission of parents/guardians of all children in the photo

I'm going to email the head with a copy of the photo to make sure she's got the right person.

OP posts:
friday16 · 14/10/2013 10:25

you cant see a difference between taking a photo of your child in assembly with school logo visible and taking a photo of them out of school with no logo on?

No. Could you explain, please?