Why the FRIG does DH need to take 15 minutes to do a poo?

[SayCoolNowSayWhip]

I don't get it. Bastard made me miss my bus, not have time for a shower and be late. Grrr.

Surely it's sit down, do your business, wipe, wash hands. All over within 2 minutes max.

But no. Instead he has to sit for 15 minutes, playing fucking FarmVille on his phone, and then take the longest shower ever. When he knows I'm in a hurry.

Grrrr. Should I LTB??!

I really hate this 'men take ages to poo' bollocks.

I'm with coldwinter. They do it because they can. Not because they need to.

Nah, we don't have kids at home. DP has a DD but she doesn't live with us. I could take just as long if I wanted, but our bathroom is cold!

I took ages as a kid, not pooing, but I used to sit and read and lose track of time.

Learned behaviour. It is the modern equivalent of dad's going out to their shed in the past.

Isn't a man's g spot up his arse or something so it's more enjoyable? I do think it's more to get some me time. Or time to collect thoughts before starting the day.

Mines in and out so no issues there.

I am so glad it is not just my dh! He always disappears into toilet 5 mins before we are about to go out. Me and 2 toddlers sit twiddlung thumbs wondering whats happenef to him!

A man's prostrate gland is stimulated by anal sex, so perhaps chick. Men's bodies are actually built to enjoy anal sex, much more than women's.

Yes it was something like that. Lucky buggers.

Everyone is different and I think some people (male or female) do need to take longer to complete this particular body function.

However, from the descriptions on here is does sound as if these men are using it as a way of exerting control or dominance?

Personally I'd feel embarrassed if I thought other people were held up or inconvenienced because I was in the toilet for too long...but these guys seem to be sending out the message that their bodily functions must take precedence over the needs of others?

so next time a fella comments on how he loves having a shit thinking its very funny, it will be fair game to respond that his turd is sexually stimulating him?

It's definitely learned behaviour. There is no fundamental biological difference that means men HAVE to take longer.

And fine, I don't have a problem with wanting 'me' time, but couldn't he do it at a more appropriate point in the day? And I still don't get why opening your bowels is me time - mmmm yes, I'd just like sit surrounded by my own stench. Lovely.

:)

I wonder when it changes, because as a rule, little boys don't linger on the toilet. They take 2 mins. When does it evolve to bloody half an hour?

15 mins! You lucky thing. Mine takes 45...
He does try to go at work during the week. He enjoys the idea of being "paid to poo"!

Interesting - was just asking my ex-RAF husband about how pooing is managed when you're out on exercise - apparently they get fed food which constipates them, so they don't have to go poo. 'So', I continued, 'what if you're out for a couple of weeks? You can't spend 45 mins behind a tree in a jungle, surely?' - 'ah', he says - 'that's different, but no, you can't spend ages behind a tree in a jungle. People don't.'

Ergo, this long poo thing must be a learned and deliberate behaviour I reckon. Neither my father nor current husband take ages to poo, but my first husband could be in there for an hour at a time...

Got to be learned behaviour. 3 year old DS takes seconds. He gets in and out of there as quickly as possible, as do I. DH takes at least 15 mins if not more. He spends 45 mins in the bathroom every morning pooling and having a shower, meaning the kids and I can't get in there. Very annoying. I do though walk by and frequently hear radio 4 so I think there is more listening going on then pooing.

Lots of my patients take a long time to poo.
Admittedly they are elderly, constipated and probably don't have a good 'push' reflex any more, but some people just do take longer.

If that's all you have to worry about then it's not really grounds to LTB is it?

Dp does this, usually at inconvenient times. According to him it's natural and normal to take so long.
No dear it's not. It's procrastination with your arse out.

Fuck's sake I've IBS and even if I'm having an attach I take 10 mins max! It must be a choice.

*attack

15 my dh is more like 30 mins

However I can't poo if I'm not relaxed. I often take longer than 15 minutes especially when I have people telling me to hurry up. And I'm a woman.

I also can't poo if I'm too cold or the windows is opens!

I think they are taking a 'time out' from life and blame needing a poo. My DH saves chapters of books, newspapers or magazines for his daily evacuation. I cannot understand. When I sit down a turd comes out immediately. I haven't got time to read a paragraph. Otherwise I wouldn't have gone to the toilet?

I think sometimes some masturbation is taking place.