to be upset?

[Mimishimi]

Yesterday morning I pulled a shoulder muscle and later on in the day I said "Oh my goodness" as it twinged. My almost 13 old daughter said "Oh, do you have any?". I thought she was mucking about and said haha etc. Then I said "you don't really mean that do you?". She said "Well, let's just say that if you do, you've hidden it very well down deep inside'. I was so upset I walked out and refused to give her the lunch I was in the process of cooking for her at the time. When I did that, she claimed she was joking but I didn't believe her. I cried like a baby all afternoon she hurt my feelings so badly and I can't remember ever crying at anything she has said before.

Then this morning I got out of the shower and my 7 year old son started talking about my tummy and called me a big fat panda. I'm 5'4 and weigh 9 stone, 6lbs. So not super thin but not overweight for my height either. Obviously didn't cry like a baby over this one but still hurt all the same. Have sent both kids out with their dad and don't feel like talking to either one of them ... ever again! For at least two days at least...

Yes, it is almost that time of the month so probably more sensitive than usual but AIBU to feel like quitting being their mum (only half joking about feeling that way)? How do you react when your kids say hurtful things? Do you just let it slide or do you pull them up on it?

It's not uncommon for upset people to remove themselves sharpish in order to cry in private.

she's not doing it every day whenever she doesn't get her own way. Or at least not that she mentions...

So many judgemental parents on here.
OP, your daughter will have learnt a very valuable lesson from seeing you so upset. I can vividly remember the odd occasion I have really upset my parents with words or actions, but I couldn't even count the number of times I got a good telling-off about being a "typical teenager".

You are NOT being unreasonable, but some of these snotty perfect mothers are.

But we don't always behave in the most suitable or best way - OP was looking for some help with what to and has only done this once. You did provide an example cailin but some of the comments on here are outrageous.

I don't believe anyone that tells me they have always behaved in the most suitable or perfect way when they are premenstural, have hurt themselves and receive a very cutting remark.

Fgs, how things get twisted
The OP didn't say she stormed off, or sulked
She says she walked out and discontinued making her dds lunch after said dd had said something very hurtful.
And as for abuse, don't be bloody ridiculous. The child is 13, perfectly capable of making herself a sandwich after her mother has walked off because she upset her.

Op, I think your daughter was a bit mean, that's a pretty considered thing to say, designed to hurt. Not an off the cuff remark
What your ds said, I think is not, you're obviously not fat, kids that age say anything. I don't think he meant anything by it, but he should be told that its not ok to talk about how people look.
Fwiw, my mum threw a plate of spaghetti at my sister and I once after we'd been disrespectful. It was a bit hormonally charged!

op I think you have every right to be upset.

13 and 7 are quite old enough to know unkind remarks arnt funny.

I totally disagree with posters who seem to assume children can be rude and unkind.

my 4 were brought up to think before they spoke and wouldn't dream of making personal remarks like this.

tell them straight out you are hurt.

you deserve an apology and respect.

I am shocked at the comment from the poster that her children call her fat and say they hate her.

Jesus Christ. that's vile.

the body, so it's shocking to you that a teenager might have a strop at their Mum after being told they cannot stay out late and storm out of the room shouting 'you're horrible and I hate you!!!' ???

Do you know any teenagers? :)

(They then come back and apologise usually)

To me this is normal, and part of children rebelling against boundaries set by their parents. I did this sort of thing to my parents too, and my relationship with them now is fine...

re. the fat thing, it's like... Mummy why do you have a big fat tummy? From my 5 yr old. Not something to be offended by in my opinion.