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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Parents not having car seats for their children

363 replies

bicyclefish · 27/09/2013 15:50

The other day I came out of the supermarket and saw a couple getting into their car with the lady in the back seat strapped in with a CHILD on her lap (less than a 2 year old) and a slightly older child (maybe 4 or 5 ) strapped in but with no child seat or even a booster. I went across to them and told them in what was probably an overly abrupt manner that they should under no circumstances do what they were doing and that i was taking his number down and reporting him. He told me to F off and that he was 'only going up the road anyway'. Oh right thats ok then, accidents never happen on the short trip back from the supermarket... ahem..a little wound up by his lack of care for the people in his care i then told him that if he got back into his car and tried to drive away i would physically stand in front of it and sue him for assault if he drove into me... I know, i know..
upshot is, he got the family back out and went home and got the car seats that they did actually own but didn't see fit to put into the car..FFS
AIBU or should i have minded my own business?

OP posts:
insancerre · 30/09/2013 10:35

I am not incorrect. It is down to the individual what actions they take, whether they comply with rules and regulatioons is another matter.
It is no down to you.
Unless you are the law?

bicyclefish · 30/09/2013 10:35

Mumsyblouse - some fair points and thanks for that, however, in this case, none of the scenarios you mentioned were taking place. It was simply a case of lazy, unthinking parenting. It THIS case..

OP posts:
Maryz · 30/09/2013 10:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

bicyclefish · 30/09/2013 10:38

Ok, i think people are kind of straying here, if someone assaulted me, i would report them.
That is all.
Clear enough?
FFS...
I would do what i could to press charges.
If they were arrested, great.
If it went to court, perfect.
Chances of either? Probably about the same as the chances of teh police tracing the licence plate and going round to visit the parents and press charges for flouting the child safety laws.

#real world

OP posts:
Maryz · 30/09/2013 10:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

friday16 · 30/09/2013 10:39

In reality, OP, the police would tell the whole lot of you to fuck off. I'm deeply sceptical as to if any of this happened outside your imagination, as it all has the whiff of l'esprit d'escalier, but on the offchance...

If there's one thing the police really get annoyed by, it's people attempting to enforce the law themselves (for, in this case, a non-arrestable offence, too) and in the process stir up breach of the peace, possible assault and the rest. They really, really don't like vigilantes.

The driver may or may not get ticketed. Given the exemptions to the law for exigent circumstances, and that the police would be pissed off at having their time wasted, the chances are they wouldn't. And aside from anything else, until the car is driven off the private land of the carpark and moves onto the public highway, no offence has been committed, and there is no such offence as "intent to commit a moving vehicle offence". If the police nicked someone in a carpark even an intern at your local solicitors' would feel confident it getting it set aside.

You would certainly get an informal "stop being an arse" from any policeman who attended and, if you continued to screech and jump up and down, they'd arrest you on general principles (breach of the peace, obstruction, that sort of thing) chuck you in a cell for an hour to calm down. In this new Chris Grayling world, you'd also risk a caution.

Depending on your job, an arrest under those circumstances would show up on an extended CRB. A caution would show up on any CRB. That you were fighting the good fight about child seats at the time would be a matter for you discuss at interview.

Outside the world of US Police Procedurals. "pressing charges" has no meaning in English law. Charges are brought by the CPS, and in this circumstances they would be too busy pissing themselves laughing to even read the paperwork.

bicyclefish · 30/09/2013 10:40

Maryz - "I'm reporting because you are full of shit"

Nice.
Dear Mods " I don't like what this person is saying and i don't agree. Please ban them"
Really? Stop being so petty and personal

OP posts:
BeCool · 30/09/2013 10:41

id also take that taxi number and report his arse to the local authority too
Hahahahahahahaha!!

OP I think you should focus on your own life - you sound like a classic old school busybody.

Yes people should use car seats, but contrast this with my childhood when not only did we not have car seats but there were no seatbelts in the back either.

You have lost perspective. And gone all vigilante - lovely!

sugarman · 30/09/2013 10:41

Oh and the car seats thing. Maryz is right about the buckling and fitting.
It's about height more than age, car seats are designed to fit those 148cm or taller. And children's heads need more protection than adults as the muscle density in the neck is not developed enough to support them during sudden braking, nevermind a crash.

bicyclefish · 30/09/2013 10:43

friday16 - Well thats told me then...

Suffer the children because i'm not going to let that jumped up little person think he has the moral high ground..

Shame on you all.

OP posts:
heartisaspade · 30/09/2013 10:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

bicyclefish · 30/09/2013 10:44

BeCool - we've done the whole "it was fine in my day" thing....
bucket with a hole.

OP posts:
musicismylife · 30/09/2013 10:46

...and on mr angry driving home to get said car seats, he had a crash because he was so wound up that some interfering do-gooder decided to read him the riot act.

Wifey and kids are now greiving.

Well done, OP, you go to 'Heaven' the rest of us are doomed to 'Hell'

Hmm
friday16 · 30/09/2013 10:47

it is NOT up to the man and his family it is the law

Nope, it's entirely up to people whether they break the law. There may be consequences. That's their choice.

GangstersLoveToDance · 30/09/2013 10:48

Friday, will I go to hell if I admit I've done all of those things?

friday16 · 30/09/2013 10:49

Suffer the children

You realise that "suffer" doesn't mean "they should suffer" or "let them suffer", don't you?

Matthew 19:14

But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven.

It means "permit" or "tolerate" or "put up with". Clearly your literacy with regard to the Bible is as sophisticated as your literacy with regard to the law.

bicyclefish · 30/09/2013 10:49

heartisaspade - -FFS have some perspective and please read all the posts if you are going to make a judgment on me, becuause im not saying that i would do the same in ALL circumstances at ALL times, so please stop with the "black and White" world nonsense.
Good luck with your new baby though.

OP posts:
colleysmill · 30/09/2013 10:50

Oh second to last one Friday I've done frequently but again no rear seatbelts available

bicyclefish · 30/09/2013 10:51

friday16 -

#parentOfTheYear2014

OP posts:
jacks365 · 30/09/2013 10:52

Friday to answer
No
Yes
No
Yes
No
Yes
Yes - but only because the ticket collector didn't come round to buy one from.
Yes
No
No.

bicyclefish · 30/09/2013 10:52

musicismylife - yeah, nice retort.. lets make upsomethign that didn't happen and say what if?
OK so "what if2 i didn't say anything and both kids were wiped out in a massive car accident caused by another driver and nothing to do with the parents? All good there then.

OP posts:
insancerre · 30/09/2013 10:54

is it 2014 already? How did that happen?
< ponders what op would do if the man had had a classic car that doesn't have to have seat belts>

BeCool · 30/09/2013 10:54

Gee these AIBU threads where EVERYONE says YABU and the OP stays around for days to say NO I'M NOT are hilarious.

Why post at all OP? You are clearly very righteous about your actions. WTF do the rest of the worlds opinions matter to you?

bicyclefish · 30/09/2013 10:54

friday16 -
Awesome! this has moved on to checking everything with a fiction novel now.
The bible indeed....God help me...

OP posts:
GangstersLoveToDance · 30/09/2013 10:54

Jacks, the ticket collector not coming around is no excuse!

You should have sought him out! To hell with you!

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