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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To take my 3yo to a party when....

42 replies

QueenofKelsingra · 27/09/2013 14:29

his younger brother is currently vomiting up anything he eats?

Eldest has a birthday party tomorrow (a very close friend of his, mum is a close friend of mine). My youngest twin woke up sick this morning, is running a temp, not eating/throwing up anything he does eat.it is only vomiting at present, no signs of diarrhoea at the moment. so far my eldest son and the older twin are completely fine, no symptoms at all.

So WIBU to still take my eldest to the party tomorrow assuming both he and I remain symptom free? or are we likely to be contagious?

OP posts:
Rumours · 27/09/2013 19:39

I probably wouldn't go tbh

jazzandh · 27/09/2013 19:41

My experience is - 48hours and the next person gets it! So I wouldn't go personally......

Littlefish · 27/09/2013 19:43

I wouldn't go. It is likely to spread quite quickly through the rest of you, and it's not fair to risk spreading it round the rest of the party guests.

PollyPlummer · 27/09/2013 19:43

See how he is tomorrow. He might not get it, so would be a shame to miss out. It might be a good idea to find out if there will be anyone with any immunity problems just in case.

Catsize · 27/09/2013 19:44

Bonkers to even contemplate going. Can't believe it is even necessary to ask!

PollyPlummer · 27/09/2013 19:45

Grin I am obviously a wanker then.

We have had bugs where family members haven't caught it, but maybe it isn't worth the risk.

superzero · 27/09/2013 19:51

I would go.I've got 3 and the last 2 times one has had D&V nobody else in the family has got it.

mimitwo · 27/09/2013 20:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DonkeysDontRideBicycles · 27/09/2013 20:36

Ring your friend tonight, explain your youngest has it so regretfully you have to duck out.

If she says oh don't be daft, come round, it's her choice.

If DS1 or you do show symptoms in the morning then cancel.

HooverFairy · 27/09/2013 20:38

High chance you'll make other kids/parents ill, don't go. You're not BU for contemplating it though, difficult decision since it will be your DS missing out though.

SugarMiceInTheRain · 27/09/2013 20:41

I would, but then in our family we have never all caught the same bug. In fact, where D&V is involved it's only ever affected one member of the family each time. We seem to get far fewer of them than most of my friends' families though so maybe luck/ maybe resistance, who knows?

ProudAS · 27/09/2013 20:45

You wouldn't keep a kid off school because of sibling throwing up. I know a party is slightly different but this must say something about experts' assessment of risk.

ProudAS · 27/09/2013 20:49

Won't hurt to be ultra careful about hand washing after using the loo though. Whenever DH or I has had D&V the other has escaped.

BTW get into habit of always putting loo lid down before flushing even if D&V aren't involved. Microscopic droplets can end up on toothbrushes.

bababababoom · 27/09/2013 20:57

I'd have gone, as long as the child attending the party wasn't ill.

littlewhitebag · 27/09/2013 22:11

If the party attendee is fine then he can go. Bit confused as to why that is not okay. You can't spend your life thinking you shouldn't go to something just in case you might be ill. Confused

MrsRogerSterling · 27/09/2013 22:26

If both you and the child going to the party are symptom free then of course he should be able to go.

IHeartKingThistle · 27/09/2013 22:34

If I was your friend I would really appreciate being given the choice tbh, or at the very least a heads-up.

Boobybeau · 27/09/2013 22:53

There could be someone vulnerable (on chemo/anti rejection/steriods) at the party that even if your dc doesn't get the sympoms, they can still pass it on to them and it would be more serious for them. Best air on the side of caution IMO. Hope you all stay well and dc recovers soon!

Original poster
QueenofKelsingra · 27/09/2013 22:54

oooh, total split of opinions here then!!

as a few of your have said, it is quite common for one of us to be ill and none of the others so in our household experience it would be unlikely that the rest of us will get it.

the rest of us are still symptom free. youngest is still not eating but hasn't been sick this evening so far, and only V, no D! It will be just me and the eldest at the party. I know the guest list, there are no newborns, pregnant women or imuno-suppressed attendees.

proudas that is a really good point actually. I think that has swayed me towards going assuming we both stay symptom free.

catsize - bonkers? really? bit extreme - do you really shut your whole house up every time one person is ill?

I will see how things are in the morning. I think if the eldest is still fine and if the youngest isn't sick again I will definitely go (it could be something he ate I suppose as there is no D, just the V?).

I may call my friend in the morning to check though, that is a good suggestion.

OP posts:
Retroformica · 27/09/2013 23:37

We are a family of 6. Most bugs only go through a couple of us, occasionally only one or three max. Only Once all four of us got a bug.

Retroformica · 27/09/2013 23:37

If symptom free, go

Catsize · 28/09/2013 09:09

With D&V, yes, pretty much! Particularly serious for some and as someone else has said, symptom-free people can still carry it onto door handles, shopping trolleys etc. Someone brought their two young children who weren't 48hrs clear to a baby weighing clinic the other day. They were told to leave. The mind boggles... Re:the party holder saying 'don't be daft' etc the other guests will be oblivious. Is that okay?

lljkk · 28/09/2013 09:51

I would go to party for sure, with good hygiene risks of transmission are low. Am very motivated to ensure good hygiene, hate tummy bugs in the house and most of them don't spread any more, thank goodness.

livinginwonderland · 28/09/2013 09:56

You can't shut the house up if one person is sick, that's crazy. Poeple still need to go to work and kids are quite capable of going to school if their siblings are sick!

nancerama · 28/09/2013 10:03

I would phone the host mother to let her know the situation.

DH has a heart condition - to outsiders he looks like a perfectly healthy chap in his mid-30's. The truth is he is on a cocktail of drugs maintaining his condition and keeping him out of hospital. If he gets a sickness bug, he can't keep his tablets down.

We realise that it's a fact of life that he will get ill and that we can't protect the family from everything, but sickness bugs can do such major harm.