aibu to have farted in a shop & blame it on my babys nappy?

[judgejudithjudy]

i was shopping & the aisle was empty & i couldnt hold it in (still recovering from 4th degree tears) & it stunk & then just my luck a lady walked past. i was so mortified that i said to my poor sleeping baby that she stinks!

I mean yes of course YABU! I have never done this in my life!! lies

Hahahaha YANBU Id have said the same .

felt like such a scuz (if there is such a word) - dya reakon the woman believed me?

No chance.

only did this yesterday at the table with my 4 year old. he looking at me saying "what? I didn't fart" and me laughing at me and shoving him into the other room.

one of the perks of having kids or an old dog lol

Do you think she doesn't fart? We'd explode if we didn't fart

I keep farting lately - my diet has been awful - including in shops! It stinks. People must know it's me, but no-one has been brazen enough to say anything yet

It's one of the most liberating things about having small children! You can fart away merrily and anyone within smelling distance will automatically assume it's the small child.

When you released 'it' did it sound like a real prize winner?

Yep - I've done this.

That's what children and dogs are for, surely?

Love it! :-D YANBU

DH emerged from the toddler area to drink his coffee with me the other week saying he'd left them all with a massive fart.

Next thing they were cordoning off the area he looked terrified!

Turned out some girl had pooed in the ball pit though so we didn't have to leave in shame after all.

Didn't envy Playfarm staff that day!

Once years back when I was serving behind a counter I let rip a silent but extremely deadly fart. I tried to keep a straight face as the smell penatrated the nostrils of the queuing customers, but I must have been pulling a very peculiar face and this fart did smell like something had crawled up my arse and died

As the customer I was serving left, I gave her back an odd look, turned to the waiting customers and did the whole "oh.my.god...can you smell that?" Speach.

Oh they had a good ten minute conversation going over the poor victims womans bowels and diet.

Yanbu, standard parental perk.

Yanbu. We have all done this. My two won't take the blame anymore, ds gets most offended if you suggest he may have farted and he hasn't! Dd couldn't care less and has been farting continuously since I collected her from pre school an hour ago. Dh is usually the one to let off and blame the kids.

ONLY if you didn't actually have your baby with you at the time!

YANBU!

I would've done the same! I hope baby was with you!

I think you should have made a public announcement to everybody in the que and cashier and apologising for doing windy pops explaining to everybody why you are unable to control the urge.Then maybe you could have used a corn flake box or something like that to waft the air around a bit to disperse the smell and maybe get a few others to join in .Apologising all the time.HTH Honesty always pays

pmsl guys - loving all the farting stories :-) i have to say if my baby made a stink that i did, i would be worried!

YANBU

Blame the farts on them until they can point out your lies.

I also shamed out a dad who walked past me once (his wife and kids were a few steps ahead) - he let rip a massive stinky silent but deadly one. I was holding baby DS after bringing him out from the change room and said loudly "My goodness DS, what an AWFUL SMELL. That can't possibly be you can it? I just changed your nappy... no no it must have been someone else". The guy's wife cut him a look as vile as the fart :D :D :D :D

I was once in the supermarket reaching up high to pull down a box of cereal. The extra exertion involved in the action led to an involuntary, very loud fart which, unfortunately, came out the exact same time a middle aged lady had bent down right next to my arse to grab a tin of beans. She just gave me a confused, slightly distressed look and never said a word. For some reason, this set me off laughing and i couldnt stop all the way round the supermarket.

I once did a stinker on the bus, only it was a silent one. The girl across the aisle looked distinctly unimpressed.

yanbu but a bit deluded if you think anyone would believe it. toddler/baby farts or poos don't smell as vile as adult ones