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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to ask this childs mum to pay for my pram repairs.

108 replies

awakemysoull · 24/09/2013 11:57

I picked dd1 up from nursery this morning and I had dd2 in the pram. All the children gathered round the pram to see the baby as they usually do and I don't mind that at all. Most of the children are 3 and this is their first year in nursery.

One boy is rather large. Well not large, obese. There's no kind way to say it I have never ever seen a 3 year old child that size before and I'm unsure wether it's a medical condition or over feeding. I am not judging (I'm a size 20).

He started to climb up my pram and got on the wheel and started jumping. I was trying to lift him off but he was so heavy I was struggling. His parents were nowhere to be seen and the nursery teacher was trying to help me get him off the pram. He would not listen and was starting to shake the pram. I was quite annoyed by this point because dd2 was still in the pram and I was worried she was going to get hurt.

We got him off and the whole side of the pram is wrecked. The wheel has snapped in half and the tyre is ripped, the frame is actually loose and I'm not going to be able to use the pram until it's fixed.

I know this doesn't make any difference and it would be just as bad if it was any pram but It's a bugaboo and it cost me a fortune. I saved for ages to buy it and it's the only new item I bought for baby.

His mum and dad appeared and I explained what had happened. His mum laughed and said no way could her ds have done that damage. The nursery teacher stepped in and backed me up explaining again that he broke the pram. His dad started being quite aggressive and said no way was he paying for anything and it was my problem. I pointed out that it was his son who broke it and I did expect them to pay for the repairs.

I was told to fuck off Hmm (in a nursery full of children) and that I'd have to fix it myself.

I managed to half drag the pram home again but it's totally broken.

I think I can claim it on my house insurance but that's not the point. It could take weeks to fix and I have no pram now.

What should I do?

Sorry I'm rambling in quite shaken up and really angry.

Am I being unreasonable asking them to pay for repairs?

OP posts:
SmiteYouWithThunderbolts · 24/09/2013 11:59

In that situation, I would expect at least a contribution from them towards the repairs. I'm shocked that a Bugaboo could break like that though. I imagined them to be quite hard wearing!

Realistically speaking, I think the only way you could get any money out of them would be by taking them to court but that's going to be much more expensive and time consuming for you than just claiming on your insurance and seething inside at the appalling attitude of those parents.

MisselthwaiteManor · 24/09/2013 11:59

YANBU! Of course they should pay, I don't know how you can enforce it though.

QueenofallIsee · 24/09/2013 12:01

I don't think that you were unreasonable if you politely asked for their input and even if they felt that it was unjustified that they would speak to you like that is horrendous! That being said I am not sure if there is an easy resolution that would lead to them paying out for the repair. They sound like horrible people

applepieinthesky · 24/09/2013 12:01

YANBU and most decent people would offer to pay for it. Unfortunately for you they don't sound like decent people and I don't think you can force them to pay up.

Wheresmycaffeinedrip · 24/09/2013 12:01

Yanbu. What awful selfish parents. Great example bring set there

nancerama · 24/09/2013 12:03

That sounds like a really scary situation. It sounds like the little boy didn't deliberately break the pram and he was just rather over-excited, however he (and his parents) need to learn that actions have consequences. I would hope they would pay, but I'm not sure how you can force them to do so.

In the meantime, get your Bugaboo back to the shop that you bought it from and ask for a loan buggy while it's being sent away for repair - most shops offer this.

Editededition · 24/09/2013 12:05

YANBU. At all.
However, it looks as though it will not be an easy ride.
The first thing to do is get put it into writing, and sent the (polite but firm letter) asap - requesting payment for the damages, and advising that you are currently getting an estimate and will let them know.
Get the estimate.
Write informing them off the cost, and requesting payment within a set period of time.

If they go past the time, send a solicitors letter threatening small claims court
If they still fail - take it to small claims.

None of which helps your current situation Sad
I would call your house insurers .... see if you may be covered (and if legal is included) then I wonder if its possible it could be handled that way and the insurers could seek to recoup costs from the parents?
Worth the call.

NB - I would get the staff member to write down what she saw, and sign. People leave jobs, or move, and you don't want to be left in a 'your word against theirs' situation.

Toadinthehole · 24/09/2013 12:06

I think if that happened to me (and if it really was going to cost a fortune to fix) I'd phone the insurance company and ask if I could claim now and refund later if I got the money off them. If the answer was "yes" I'd go to the small claims court just because I could - assuming that the nursery worker was prepared to witness on your behalf.

QuintessentialShadows · 24/09/2013 12:06

Can you contact bugaboo and complain that the pram is so fragile?

SummerRain · 24/09/2013 12:07

They sound charming.

Morally they should pay, and apologise profusely whilst doing so, however based on your interaction with them so far I think there's not much chance of either of those things happening.

They sound quite aggressive and I'd be a bit wary of starting anything that could end up causing unpleasantness all year long while your dd is at that nursery... it's not fair that you have to think like that obviously but they don't sound like particularly fair or reasonable people.

I'd get it sorted under the insurance and steer a wide berth from this family in future. At least you have the insurance option to fall back on, not that you should have to but it could be so much worse if you couldn't claim on the insurance.

Have a Brew and and Cake to calm yourself, I'd be incandescent too if I were you.

Original poster
awakemysoull · 24/09/2013 12:11

Thanks everyone.

I'm going to give john Lewis a call that's where I bought it from and see if they can put me in touch with bugaboo. It does seem a bit strange that the buggy broke so maybe it was faulty to begin with.

I don't think I'm going to get anywhere with the parents so I'm just going to ignore them. I'll see what bugaboo say then I'll see what my house insurance say.

I'm so Shock that people think it's acceptable to behave that way in front of children. Charming people.

OP posts:
littlemslazybones · 24/09/2013 12:11

I'm not sure that the parents can be held accountable, given that they weren't there when it happened.

If they don't feel a moral obligation to chip in, I don't think there's much you can do to force their hand.

Isildur · 24/09/2013 12:12

There must have been something wrong with the pram in the first place for it to be totally wrecked. I've had loads of prams and they have all taken children of up to six years old jumping all over them repeatedly, and never broken.

And two people being needed to lift a three year-old off the side of a pram seems extraordinary, especially as you are not exactly slightly built yourself.

I doubt you'll get any money from the parents, I'd go down the home insurance side myself. Can you go to the small claims court for damage dome by a three year old, who was in the care of the nursery at the time? It seems unlikely.

jacks365 · 24/09/2013 12:14

Yanbu to wish they would pay and morally they should however forget going to the small claims court as you will not win. The boy was technically in the care of the nursery at the time so the parents wouldn't be seen as negligent or responsible for the damage in this instance. I would speak to the nursery regarding the cost as they are the only ones you would be able to pursue a claim against.

VoiceofRaisin · 24/09/2013 12:15

Was this on nursery premises? - if the teacher helped you to get this little boy away then that indicates that they were admitting some responsibility for his behaviour. I would ask them to claim for it on their insurance. If they want to preserve their no claims status, then they are in a much better position to get money off those other parents than you are if this is a nursery that charges fees.

I feel very sorry for that little boy btw because his parents sound horrible and that is what he goes home to Sad

But mostly I am glad your DD2 was unharmed Smile

AmberLeaf · 24/09/2013 12:15

No idea how much a bugaboo costs, but assume its not cheap seeing as its the 'in thing', surely it shouldn't break that easy?

The parents sound like they were being defensive but no excuse whatsoever for swearing like that in front of small children.

nancerama · 24/09/2013 12:15

OP, John Lewis will almost certainly lend you an alternative frame while yours is in for repair. They were great when a friend's iCandy lost a wheel. They may be able to persuade bugaboo to fix it under warrantee.

AmberLeaf · 24/09/2013 12:17

Good points re the child being in the care of the nursery and not the parents.

BackforGood · 24/09/2013 12:18

I was going to say the same as littleMLB . If I've read correctly, the parents weren't there - so, if anyone was responsible for his behaviour it would be the Nursery, not them.
That said, I'm surprised a pram wheel broke that easily, however large he is, he's still a 3 yr old, and I know my inexpensive pram could have taken the weight of say a 10 yr old child without snapping.

munchkinmaster · 24/09/2013 12:23

To be honest - id go the hassle free way and go to Lewis's - explain a three year old climbed on the pram. It's clearly not of "merchantable quality" and demand a repair or replacement. I'm guessing you are within guarantee period. Don't bother going to bugaboo direct. Your contract is with Lewis's and they are relatively soft when it comes to stuff like this.

QuintessentialShadows · 24/09/2013 12:26

Yes, try give the nursery a call. One of "their" children broke your pram on their premises.

pigletmania · 24/09/2013 12:28

Yanbu a all. A pram has a certain amount of weight that it can take, it's not a bulldozer Hmm, it was designed to be used by a baby not wrecked by a large nursery child.

pigletmania · 24/09/2013 12:31

Just because te parents were not near does not make them not responsible! They should have been near, their child is in their care until they hand him over to nursery!

AmberLeaf · 24/09/2013 12:33

No, it was pick UP time so he would have still been in the care of nursery technically

jacks365 · 24/09/2013 12:33

Pigletmania this happened at pick up time so the child was in the care of the nursery. The nursery hadn't handed him back to his parents because they had not yet arrived.