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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to ask this childs mum to pay for my pram repairs.

108 replies

awakemysoull · 24/09/2013 11:57

I picked dd1 up from nursery this morning and I had dd2 in the pram. All the children gathered round the pram to see the baby as they usually do and I don't mind that at all. Most of the children are 3 and this is their first year in nursery.

One boy is rather large. Well not large, obese. There's no kind way to say it I have never ever seen a 3 year old child that size before and I'm unsure wether it's a medical condition or over feeding. I am not judging (I'm a size 20).

He started to climb up my pram and got on the wheel and started jumping. I was trying to lift him off but he was so heavy I was struggling. His parents were nowhere to be seen and the nursery teacher was trying to help me get him off the pram. He would not listen and was starting to shake the pram. I was quite annoyed by this point because dd2 was still in the pram and I was worried she was going to get hurt.

We got him off and the whole side of the pram is wrecked. The wheel has snapped in half and the tyre is ripped, the frame is actually loose and I'm not going to be able to use the pram until it's fixed.

I know this doesn't make any difference and it would be just as bad if it was any pram but It's a bugaboo and it cost me a fortune. I saved for ages to buy it and it's the only new item I bought for baby.

His mum and dad appeared and I explained what had happened. His mum laughed and said no way could her ds have done that damage. The nursery teacher stepped in and backed me up explaining again that he broke the pram. His dad started being quite aggressive and said no way was he paying for anything and it was my problem. I pointed out that it was his son who broke it and I did expect them to pay for the repairs.

I was told to fuck off (in a nursery full of children) and that I'd have to fix it myself.

I managed to half drag the pram home again but it's totally broken.

I think I can claim it on my house insurance but that's not the point. It could take weeks to fix and I have no pram now.

What should I do?

Sorry I'm rambling in quite shaken up and really angry.

Am I being unreasonable asking them to pay for repairs?

OP posts:

dedado · 24/09/2013 15:57

I think it's worth speaking to the nursery manager, possibly bringing a letter detailing the incident. What's to stop it happening again? The nursery need to know about the damage, the chance of him hurting a child, and about the crazies swearing in front of the children.

BackforGood · 24/09/2013 16:07

There are some fab judgy judgy nesses on this thread

if she's the type of mother to allow her child to become obese in the first place - of course you all know the medical history of the child, and are all 100% there is no medical cause for this - Prader Willi Syndrome for example ?

Footface · 24/09/2013 16:09

Had the parent picked up the child, or was he still in the nurseries care?

pigletmania · 24/09/2013 16:13

Exactly, if the parents are not teir yet, the child is still in loco parentis and it's their responsibility to control the children, but it does sound like an accident. Don't let any children to near, and if you see this boy again and he tries it again tell him no and move away. The parents sync awful though

FixItUpChappie · 24/09/2013 16:26

Well I wouldn't want to pay you TBH. Those parents acted like assholes BUT if I were them I would have looked at the daycare staff to resolve it. They left their 3 year old in the daycares charge - it was for the staff to supervise and mitigate the situation.

RandomCitizen · 24/09/2013 16:28

Bee or Cameleon? (or something else!) sorry just curious, and I am glad you've got it sorted out.

pixiepotter · 24/09/2013 16:56

The parents are not legally (and I would argue morally) liable.They were not behaving negligently.
I would have thought that nursery would have public liability insurance which would cover damages to a third party.Have you spoken to them yet?

Wheresmycaffeinedrip · 24/09/2013 17:04

See I completely disagree, if my child had got out and no one noticed, or hurt themselves on equipment that had been assembled wrong then yes nursery would be responsible. However if my child happened to be destructive and didn't listen then I would feel that I should suck it up and accept responsibility for damage caused my my child. If I can't control them at home what hope do strangers in charge if 20 other kids have.

edam · 24/09/2013 17:09

I'm shocked that the parents were aggressive instead of being terribly apologetic. What a charming father that poor kid has.

McNewPants2013 · 24/09/2013 17:38

I think the nursery is at fault.

The pick up at that nursery sound very chaotic, every nursery DC have ever attended was the parents waited outside the building and the children bought to the main door.

chocolatespiders · 24/09/2013 17:46

Tough one and I feel your pain, I sold things on ebay to replace dds trampoline mat then 3 weeks later neighbours thought they should burn down there shed and bits flew over the fence burning 5 inch hole in trampoline and a few penny size holes. Neighbours couldnt care less and not interested in paying towards a new one.

If it wad me I would be mortified anecdotal pay up

GwendolineMaryLacey · 24/09/2013 17:56

It's not the nursery's fault. Presumably if the child was outside then he had been handed over to his parents and was back in their 'care'.

The children at school also crowd round dd2's pushchair every morning and I'm always having to tell them to stop climbing on the pushchair which is quite robust (BJCM GT) but I'd expect the same robustness from a Bugaboo.

Yes the horrid parents should offer to pay but they probably won't. Does sound like the chassis might not have been as strong as it should have been though.

Mojavewonderer · 24/09/2013 18:03

So glad to hear you got a replacement op.
Totally gobsmacked by the boys parents though, the aggression they showed just proves they knew they were in the wrong but didn't want to take responsibility. That poor child doesn't stand a chance!

QuintessentialShadows · 24/09/2013 18:52

oh well done john lewis!

claudedebussy · 24/09/2013 18:57

well, if it's a bugaboo bee it's actually quite easy to break the chassis. i broke the chassis on mine when the pram was only 4 months old and i wasn't being particularly rough with it. the replacement has lasted for 2 years so far though...

Runningwithwolves · 24/09/2013 19:08

So glad you got it sorted, I echo the faulty bugaboo as I've had mine for almost 10 years and boy, has that Fromm seen some abuse.

Runningwithwolves · 24/09/2013 19:09

Fromm?! FROG!!!!

Original poster

awakemysoull · 24/09/2013 19:33

I should maybe make some things clearer sorry I haven't been back since earlier.

It's a cameleon pushchair so should be quite sturdy.

At pick up time, all parents go in together to pick the children up. There is a teacher at the door to let people in and out and pick up time is 11-11.15 so people come and go all the time. All the kids just run about till their parents come. It actually is quite chaotic come to think of it but it's always been like that so I thought most nurseries were the same. It's a school nursery and she goes every morning 9-11.

His parents were outside chatting, I had gone in before them so the child was running about waiting for his mum and dad.

I'm so glad John Lewis were helpful I just hope it gets repaired under the warranty. I may get a shiny new pushchair

OP posts:

WaitMonkey · 24/09/2013 19:43

Bloody love John Lewis.

mumofweeboys · 24/09/2013 19:47

Glad you got sorted.

The parents were rude/horrible but if had been my child I would have been annoyed that he was allowed to cause the damage (as the mum of a hyperactive/liable to break things boy). If a nursey worker and a fellow parent couldn't control a 3 year old then there is something seriously wrong.

My nursery you wait at the door and the teacher sends the child out once the parent arrives. The children are sat waiting on the mat inside the classroom, my other child's reception class does the same.

HopeS01 · 24/09/2013 19:51

YaNbu!!! Take them to Small Claims Court.. It only costs £80 and the threat is probably enough to scare them into paying

claudedebussy · 24/09/2013 20:16

hmm my chameleon was virtually indestructible! and i tried

got rid of it eventually to get the crappy bee. boy did i regret that!

well, glad jl have sorted it for you and i'd be giving those parents a very wide berth in future.

holidaysarenice · 24/09/2013 20:54

You will have an excess on ur house insurance to pay and your policy will rise next year.

I would send them the bill, if they don't pay I would name and shame to all and sundry. Embarrassment might shift them.

MidniteScribbler · 24/09/2013 21:05

Two adults couldn't remove a three year old from the side of a pram?

Sleepgrumpydopey · 24/09/2013 21:05

Just wondering could the insurer say you misused product (jumping on side) and refuse to pay or if you say deliberate damage would you need a police report?

Just saying as ime insurers try not to pay out.

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