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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think we should be able to afford nice things?

58 replies

Souredstones · 23/09/2013 17:08

Not a boast but we are lucky (due to MIL giving us her mortgage free house) to be rent and mortgage free. DH and I both work full time at below national average salary jobs but enough to get by and enough for the government to decide we don't need tax credits.

We worked it that he pays all the bills from his account and I pay childcare and the kids hobbies from mine, we each pay our own mobile bills and all is fair in love and finances

So why the hell do we struggle each month?

I've just bought a cash tin and an accounts book so I can track at least my income and outgoings for 3-6 months and have put my debit card in there with a lump sum of money to pay the weekly outlays of hobbies and dinner moneys and hope to keep track of it all.

But AIBU to think where the hell does the money go each month?!

DH thinks I'm being daft to keep track of it like this because he thinks it's just general bills that eat it up.

Anyone else having this ridiculous struggle? God knows how we'd cope with rent on top!! All this and the house is falling apart and every room needs refurbishing as well as both front and back gardens (which is why MIL gave it to us rent free!!) argh! I feel like screaming at the moment and need money saving tips too!!

OP posts:

BeatrixIsPotty · 23/09/2013 20:14

What sort of household income are we talking about OP? just a ball park figure?

I wonder how you are struggling given what you have said, because without rent/mortgage we'd be really very comfortable.

freddiefrog · 23/09/2013 20:20

I started keeping an eye on expenditure a couple of years ago

We do alright and I always thought I was quite frugal, but seeing every item listed and the total at the end of the week horrified me.

A £ for a gingerbread man here and and £2 for a comic there doesn't seem extravagant at the time, but the small purchases added up really quickly.

It makes it easier to see where to make cutbacks.

LynetteScavo · 23/09/2013 20:59

If the OP is working 35 hours a week, the joint income will be below £22K, according to the OP.

I may be wrong.

BeatrixIsPotty · 23/09/2013 21:08

The BBC says that the uk national average is just over £26K, if they are both on less than national average incomes, lets say £20k each then that would be a joint income of £40k.

I might be overgeneralising, but if they are on 40K with no rent/mortgage then they are better off than most!

If they were on a total joint income of 22K I'm pretty sure they would be getting tax credits?

marriedinwhiteisback · 23/09/2013 21:26

I find taking cash out of the bank rather than just using the bank card is great for keeping tabs on how quickly the blue and brown crispy things disappear.

Also OP you say your house is a wreck - rather than worrying about the decor and furnishings might it actually be a good idea to look at insulation and invest in a new boiler. It might be worth raising the cost against the value of the house as a tiny mortgage if the potential savings are £600 - £700 or more a year.

LynetteScavo · 23/09/2013 21:28

Duh, I read national average salary as minimum wage. Sorry.

£40K with no rent/mortgage should be OK, if you are know where it's going and don't have wild weekends and only have two DC.

I have a friend who's household income is roughly double mine,but she leads a similar lifestyle overall to me: similar house, similar holidays, because she spends lots on little things.....meals out, designer clothes etc. OK, she and her DH have nicer cars, but she really does flutter money away....just like I used to when I was young free and single with a large disposable income.

LittleRobots · 23/09/2013 21:38

Most people around here have under 40 grand family income and big mortgages /rent. I just cannot see how that could be considered anything other than a good position.

The national family average income is less isn't it? And that would need to pay for more.

Snog · 23/09/2013 22:11

£40 per week on childrens hobbies is an extravagance and counts as having nice things in my book! this is £2k a year.
if you view thus as an "essential" then maybe there are more "essentials" in your lifestyle that others would view as nice things to have?
if your family income is between £40k and £50k and you pay for childcare it doesnt surprise me that you dont have money to burn though. people on lower family income than you often receive housing benefit or live in low cost housing ime.

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