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AIBU?

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Original poster

To speak to the school?

1002 replies

Orchwoid · 17/09/2013 17:47

I've just been to collect my son from his school and he's told me that he won't be cast in his school Christmas play but all the other children will.

I am fumming. I am going to go and speak to his teacher first thing tomorrow morning but I am so angry that I can't work out whether I'm being reasonable or not.

OP posts:
saintlyjimjams · 18/09/2013 22:33

One of my sons was cast as a present once. That would be ideal, celebrate the materialism of christmas rather than the god shit

filee777 · 18/09/2013 22:34

No, the issue here and now is that the child was not given any opportunity to be involved in the winter celebration because it was all religious. Why not have him helped our back stage? Why not say 'we've gor this really special job for you?

Part of being in a community like a school is trying to make it work and good for everyone.

mumthetaxidriver · 18/09/2013 22:34

OP As an atheist surely you don't believe in God therefore whether a shepherd is related to God or Jesus is totally irrelevant - in your case your son will just be taking part in a play with little meaning. Are you really going back into school tomorrow. If you are u feel sorry for your son - if this has caused such a reaction on here imagine the staff room.

Maryz · 18/09/2013 22:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ClayDavis · 18/09/2013 22:35

I'm not sure about that. Plenty of children from other religions do take part in their school nativity play. Some playing 'god parts'. Those children haven't been removed from all religious practice by their parents though.

ItIsKnown · 18/09/2013 22:36

Grin at Christmas lobster.

OP please go back to the school and ask for this to be written into the play.

Or DS could be the

ClayDavis · 18/09/2013 22:37

Filee the OP has only said that he was upset at not being cast in the play. She hasn't said anything about whether or not he was given the opportunity to do something else, or even how this conversation came about at all. I get the impression they would be equally upset by a job helping out backstage because he wants to be onstage.

ilovesooty · 18/09/2013 22:38

I suspect that the OP would be complaining if her son had been given a backstage role.

forumdonkey · 18/09/2013 22:38

Yes filee we've read what you've put but that does not change the theme of this thread!! OP made a decision, school respected and acted on that decision and now OP has contradicted said decision and is 'fumming' Shock they have done what SHE ASKED. Even when they were happy to comply with OP's contradiction she still wasn't happy - what part of that don't you get?

sits rocking, stabbing blunt pencils in my eyes to remove fumming

ilovesooty · 18/09/2013 22:38

Sorry x post there.

Alisvolatpropiis · 18/09/2013 22:40

Agree with Maryz

I was christened and am extremely agnostic. Some might say atheist. I don't, simply because I don't care. I don't care enough about any religion for it to affect my daily thoughts.

Any children I may have in the future? I'll let them decide for themselves. I went to a primary (90's) at which we said prayers and sang hymns daily, it was a state primary. We were read bible stories. My family in the main believe in God. I enjoyed the bible tales as a child. Still don't believe.

I won't wilfully exclude any child I have from joining in school activities be they religious or not. I trust they will be able to make up their own minds, as I did mine.

NewNameforNewTerm · 18/09/2013 22:40

I have taught Muslims, Hindus and Buddhists - none of them have chosen to withdraw their children from assemblies, harvest festival at the church or the nativity play at the church. The JW and Plymouth Brethren children however have. They withdrew from everything. Either their elders (?) or a member of staff supervised other activities away from the religious activities going on.

filee777 · 18/09/2013 22:41

I think ideally the school would have spoken to the parents first and got an understanding of what level of involvement they would be okay with. So that the child still got involved with such a big event (where possible) and so that this sort of issue didn't arise.

YouTheCat · 18/09/2013 22:41

Well, I'd be pushing for the part of Joseph or, at the very least, Mary. Grin

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 18/09/2013 22:43

Filee - even backstage, the OP's ds would hear the Christmas carols and the nativity story. How would that be compatible with her clearly stated wish that her child should not do anything religious at school?

forumdonkey · 18/09/2013 22:44

No, the issue here and now is that the child was not given any opportunity to be involved in the winter celebration because it was all religious. Why not have him helped our back stage? Why not say 'we've gor this really special job for you?

Its not a winter celebration - ITS A CHRISTMAS PLAY and OP has said he couldn't be involved in it NOT THE SCHOOL SCHOOL ARE HAPPY TO HAVE HIM IN THE PLAY

cjel · 18/09/2013 22:47

I think the lobster still came to worship the baby jesusSmile

mumthetaxidriver · 18/09/2013 22:47

Can't believe Louise isn't here! Thank you by the way for a good few hours of entertainment!

Alisvolatpropiis · 18/09/2013 22:48

NameNew - I've not heard of Plymouth Brethrens before, what do they believe?

Maryz · 18/09/2013 22:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

forumdonkey · 18/09/2013 22:49

filee777 would you ask a Jehovah witness about the level of involvement they want their child to have in a christmas play?

exoticfruits · 18/09/2013 22:55

The thread has to win a prize for being the funniest ever!
OP does not want her child backstage- she wants him taking part.
At least all other parents of children that I have known,who are withdrawn from assembly, have consistency and don't expect to be in a religious play and they don't expect all other children to not do a traditional nativity.
To approach from a different angle - what part does she want for him? Will be be able to sing the carols? What will happen if a prayer is included? What happens when they practise in assembly?

NewNameforNewTerm · 18/09/2013 23:00

We can say the same thing until we are blue in the face, phrasing it in a variety of ways for clarity, but certain people will not hear it because they have issues with Christianity, schools and obviously crap teachers! I'm not going to waste anymore time as this is no longer entertaining, just frustrating that a minority of posters have an arrogant disregard of the rights of a church school to follow the legal expectation of being Christian. And the constant criticism of the school for following what they believed, quite rightly, was exactly what his mum wanted and were respecting their family's beliefs. And Filee's expectation that despite Christians celebrating Christmas in December for a long time, a previous user of the date has more rights to be celebrated in our schools so as not to offend.

HangingGardenofBabbysBum · 18/09/2013 23:03

got an understanding of what level of involvement they would be okay with.

Filee why are you still banging this drum? The imaginary OP wrote to the school and told them.

Unless they had met her and believed her to be an unhinged fantasist with no little grasp of the basic tenets of the Nativity, why would they feel the need to go back and check when she said 'no God' that she also included the Nativity?

Oh, wait...

Boaty · 18/09/2013 23:07

I've just read bits of the thread, I couldn't find it this morning and thought it had gorne! Shock
I'm now looking forward to a thread in a few years time from a fumming mother saying DC has decided to become a priest after being refused to be in a school nativity when he was little and how it scarred him and turned him towards 'god shit' because he was left out and felt there was something missing from his life
it's late better go to bed

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