You don't have a drinks party the same night as a slumber party

[Atavistic]

My DD is invited, along with 4 other class mates, to a sleepover in another 8 year olds house. Another mum, not a mother of one of the sleep over girls, has texted me to ask am I going there for drinks tomorrow night. She received a text today, from the host mum, inviting her to a drinks party there ( women only) the same night as the sleepover.

I think this is really odd. Am I overprotective? My DD woke up upset and crying the last time she stayed. It's not the child's birthday, and the Mum doesn't drink. I really don't want to start WWIII, but I will really have to go against my gut instinct not to cancel.

I really need to count the votes. AIBU?

Maybe the butler will look after the girls, or the parlour maid.

Yanbu.
I would expect the host mum to be paying attention to the girls sleeping over rather, checking they are ok etc rather than chatting with her mates.

She sounds like a woman who is capable of multitasking Idespair!

YANBU. I wouldn't feel that comfortable about it if some of the girls will have their mums there for the drinks thing and others (ie your DD) won't.

And, different situation, to the PP whose daughter went to a sleepover and was then cared for by a babysitter and the parents didn't tell you .... I don't think that's ok. You made a decision that it was ok for those parents to have charge of your daughter for the night. Didn't you mind that you didn't know / have any say over who the babysitter was? I think it was insensitive of your friends not to tell you.

Ok, I'll be taking the MN view into consideration. Thank you

BackforGood

Odfod is really all one can say to this.

I doubt whether five 8 year old girls on a sleepover will be anywhere near ready for bedtime by the time the last drinks guest leaves so it is not as if the Mum will be distracted by her adult guests from dealing with any little girls requiring bedtime reassurances.

I think it's totally fine, and a good idea!

I agree she should tell the other parents, and invite all of them if she's going to invite any, but I don't think that having people round is a problem in itself.

I spent lots of nights with my best friends family throughout my childhood and her parents socialised at home a lot. I always loved it!

YANBU

It doesn't sit comfortably with me. No they're not babies but 8 is quite young to sleepover especially if they haven't done it before. If I was the host mother it just wouldn't occur to me to have party, I would want to be around in case one of the girls needed me or was upset.

And yes it's very odd that some mums will be there and not others.

I think YABU.

I often do something similar, simply because we hardly get a weekend night when one of the DC isn't having a few friends to sleep over and also because its likely I'll be up late anyway so why nt have some company.

I've never thought to mention it in advance before. I typically invite parents to join when they drop DC off. Never had any comments.

Maybe your dd shouldn't go, perhaps your family isn't suited to that social circle.

Yabu. If you dont want your child there then thats fine as its your choice,but be honest