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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think this man at the cinema was plain nasty?

806 replies

WombatCat · 09/09/2013 23:57

Dh and I watched a film at the cinema on Saturday night.

There was a young man a few rows back from us with very vocal Tourette's. Obviously it was distracting to most people around him, but once the film started I didn't find it an issue. However, one man decided to tell him to shut up and "isn't there a special showing you could go to?"

Quite a few people appeared to be in agreement with him. I now wish I said something.

OP posts:
Fontofnowt · 10/09/2013 12:28

Sorry Fleta that was unfair of me.
Your post read to me like you were showing a kindness to the poor jerky lady.
It was likely my interpretation of it and not how it was meant.

Writerwannabe83 · 10/09/2013 12:30

I guess disruptive noise can be frustrating in whatever context - irregardless of why it is happening. However, even if there is a genuine reason for the noise that the person cannot help (I.e a hungry baby that is is screaming) that doesn't necessarily mean it is any less frustrating. I just accept that hungry babies cry, just as people with Tourette's will have Tics and that's life.

I completely agree with whoever made the point about people with Tourette's having to live with the condition and never being able to have 'time out' from it - maybe the guy who shouted in the cinema should have thought about that! What he said to the guy with Tourette's was unforgivable, he should have been thrown out in my opinion.

WilsonFrickett · 10/09/2013 12:30

Jesus fucking wept. This is my child my arse. This is my child as long as he only goes to the cinema at 'special times', more like.

Writerwannabe83 · 10/09/2013 12:32

Sorry allthatglistens - I saw that people had mentioned showings for children with Autism but I didn't realise they had also mentioned there should be screenings for people with Tourette's. I thought that was just a comment made by the guy in the cinema who had done the shouting.

AllThatGlistens · 10/09/2013 12:34

Dya know what?

All this reinforces to me is how I have to educate my disabled boys about how to treat some neurotypical adults with dignity and respect, because they clearly don't have the advantages that my boys do, and how lucky they are to be such sweet, compassionate, intelligent children.

I'll be sure to make them aware that not every adult is as blessed as they are.

And under my anger? I mostly feel pity for the ignorant and I'll-educated, who will never get to experience the world in the way that my boys do.

Writerwannabe83 · 10/09/2013 12:36

Fleta - maybe I came across wrong too then, sorry. I think what you did was brilliant seeing as you were doing it at her request. I.e she voiced her worries to you and you did what you could do to help her enjoy the show, absolutely nothing wrong with that!

I was just trying to say that even though she was able to enjoy the same show as everybody else (as opposed to a showing just for her) adaptions still had to be made. However, like I said, this wasn't because you or anybody else was being discriminatory, but because she had approached you and you wanted to allay her worries so she could enjoy herself. What you did was very thoughtful.

AllThatGlistens · 10/09/2013 12:36

It's ok writer, I just get so incredibly fucking angry with the disablist attitudes, and vented at you. Apologies for that, it's such a touchy subject for me and thousands of others.

Fleta · 10/09/2013 12:36

Thanks Fleta Smile

She actually approached me at an event and we got talking and she said how she never got to the theatre because she didn't feel comfortable. I asked her what would make it doable for her.

Fleta · 10/09/2013 12:38

FOnt. I meant to thank Font. Not myself #facepalm

Thanks Writer I certainly wouldn't have done ANY of what I did had she not wanted it.

I hope the adaptations I made were for her IYSWIM - not because I thought they HAD to be made for anyone else. No different to me than booking the removable seats for someone in a wheelchair.

hermioneweasley · 10/09/2013 12:38

Aargh - as many posters have already pointed out, the autism showings are for the benefit of children with autism. They are not for the benefit of keeping disabled kids away from the "normals". I am actually smiling to myself at the thought of tic disorder and Tourette's special showings, now that would be disruptive!

Writerwannabe83 · 10/09/2013 12:40

Don't worry about it allthatglistens - it is a difficult subject.

I have had some very hurtful things said to me in the past about my disability and probably very unfair things, so maybe I'm just used to some people's views now. Not much shocks me - though implying there should be special screenings for people with Tourette's does..

AllThatGlistens · 10/09/2013 12:43

Maybe we should just have specialist 'arsehole' screenings, I reckon we could fill cinemas throughout the UK! Grin

Fontofnowt · 10/09/2013 12:43

hermioneweasley
I feel a bit of a fraud too, I have HFA and Tic disorder so although I tic a fair bit and can be embarrassed by it I tend not to give a fuck anymore so the idea of a big cinema room full of us middle aged ticcers is my idea of a party.

Pagwatch · 10/09/2013 12:45

Don't call them 'arsehole screenings' though. Can you imagine the google result?

YouTheCat · 10/09/2013 12:45

Yes, Allthat! Special screenings for terminal arseholes. Grin

Make them watch Danny Dyer films on a loop.

Writerwannabe83 · 10/09/2013 12:47

When I told one woman that I had epilepsy, who was actually a nurse, she said to me, "You must be mistaken my dear, you're too normal to have ^that^"

Another lady I told was gob smacked, had this incredulous expression of her face and shrieked out, "You wouldn't think it to look at you would you??!" Let's just say she got a very sarcastic response back!

I've met many people with opinions on what I should or shouldn't do, including them voicing the fact I shouldn't be allowed to be near children... Hmm

Writerwannabe83 · 10/09/2013 12:48

Grin @ Pagwatch!!

Do it, I dare you!!!

AvonCallingBarksdale · 10/09/2013 12:50

Wow, just wow to some of these responses. As it happens, I went to see the new PErcy JAckson with the DC a few weeks ago -there was a young man making quite a few involuntary noises during the film. Tbh that just mixed in with all the other myriad noises at the cinema. Film volumes are bloody loud anyway. And even it, even if it had have distracted me, so what? It's 2 hours out of my life. Live and let live. I hope the guy at PErcy JAckson enjoyed the film as much as us.

AllThatGlistens · 10/09/2013 12:52

Wasn't expecting this thread to make me actually lol but it just has! Grin

Erm.. Yes, perhaps we should come up with a better name Blush Grin

Pagwatch · 10/09/2013 12:52
Grin Nooooo. Not after innocently googling 'adult swing' for DS2
AllThatGlistens · 10/09/2013 12:53

Hahaha!! Ugh I can imagine the results you got Pag! Grin

AmazingDisgrace · 10/09/2013 12:54

Shocked at some of the comments on this thread. The guy with TS was unlikely to tic throughout the film and even if he did so what? It's less noticeable than the constant rustling of popcorn and sweets, or the slurping of drinks.

Do you really want to isolate people with disabilities even further? My son has TS and goes to the cinema a lot. Tics wax and wane with severity and quite often he'll be able to sit through a film with not a single vocal tic. The poor guy in the OP was probably desperately trying to suppress his tics.

Some of the comments on here make me sick. Angry

AmazingDisgrace · 10/09/2013 12:54

Shocked at some of the comments on this thread. The guy with TS was unlikely to tic throughout the film and even if he did so what? It's less noticeable than the constant rustling of popcorn and sweets, or the slurping of drinks.

Do you really want to isolate people with disabilities even further? My son has TS and goes to the cinema a lot. Tics wax and wane with severity and quite often he'll be able to sit through a film with not a single vocal tic. The poor guy in the OP was probably desperately trying to suppress his tics.

Some of the comments on here make me sick. Angry

Writerwannabe83 · 10/09/2013 12:54

I'm going to do it - just because I need a giggle!!!

candycoatedwaterdrops · 10/09/2013 12:54

Of course there should be segregation................for the ignoramuses of the world! Seriously people, you are going to a public place, so you maybe just maybe will encounter other members of the human race. Some members of the human race are disabled. If it annoys you, then you'd better stay at home and save up for a private home cinema system.