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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

or is this harrassment?

85 replies

WillIEverBeFree · 29/08/2013 21:05

Reg under NC, think footballer and dentistry.

I have a restraining order against my ex. I now find out he is having my neighbour spy on me and report every visitor, every car complete with make, model and registration that parks on my drive and every single word I say to anyone.

This has just floored me. For the past 5 weeks, every single move I make has been monitored and reported to my ex. He even knows that my fucking bin was not emptied and why - even I don't know that! (it was the recycling one).

The police don't want to know. I'm fucking angry, feeling vengeful and possibly a tiny bit scared. And probably BU. But hey. Give me your thoughts MN, please.

OP posts:
WillIEverBeFree · 01/09/2013 23:11

Am going to try to sleep. Thank you all again for your help x

OP posts:
EldritchCleavage · 01/09/2013 23:17

OK, it's sent. Tomorrow is another day OP, and just remember we're all rooting for you.

TartanRug · 02/09/2013 06:00

This is horrible OP. My ex got his two brothers to stand outside my house staring through my living room window every night for a week. Its scary and you must feel sick about it. :(

ZillionChocolate · 02/09/2013 07:16

Do you know whether nosy neighbour rents or owns? Maybe hold off sending the letter until you've spoken to the Council.

WillIEverBeFree · 02/09/2013 21:44

I am seeing the council on Wednesday and intend to ask if they can support me in a case for harassment.

Really don't want to move AGAIN but I think I will have to consider it.

How naive of me to think his conviction was the end of it. It's only the beginning. In the meantime his children are suffering, one is in a hostel with him and the other is with ex's parents.

Maybe I should do the decent thing and move so...

I won't but that's how it makes me feel.

OP posts:
WillIEverBeFree · 02/09/2013 21:45

Zillion neighbour is council tenant, same as me.

OP posts:
WillIEverBeFree · 02/09/2013 21:46

Thank you again Eldritch.

OP posts:
ZillionChocolate · 02/09/2013 22:43

Good news that he's a council tenant. Make sure you take along any documents to the meeting. If you can work out a diary of what's been going on, that might help you explain it all and not miss anything out. Good luck with it.

IneedAsockamnesty · 02/09/2013 23:29

There are a few possible answers dependant on a few things.

If its a none mol issues under the family law act then its quite likely to be a breach as long as it contains words to the effect of...... Not cause alarm or distress or incite or encourage a third party to do so.

Its unlikely to currently be a breach if its a cps obtained one (usually made as a result of a criminal DV trial during the sentencing) but if it is one of these its fairly easy to get behaviour like that prevented in future

Toadinthehole · 03/09/2013 07:36

Are you in touch with the woman who threw your ex out? Will she give details of what your ex told your neighbour to do? Have you mentioned her to your solicitor?

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