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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to go to sleep without hearing my noisy neighbours cackling in their garden?

38 replies

cls77 · 25/08/2013 00:18

Ok so new neighbours moved in and I think they are away during the week as at wkends they have friends round and socialise, fair enough. The first time they were going to have an actual party they stopped outside my house introduced themselves and warned me of a "may be noisy but won't be late party" that eve, it went on till 3am :(
Since then I am on edge every wkend wondering if they'll be out in the garden again as they must be either the loudest talkers in the world or due to the fact that their wall surrounding the garden (which they added extra height to soon after moving in) is only 8 feet from my bedroom window!!
AIBU to expect them to bugger off indoors after a certain time? I am here with my dd on my own and really don't want to have to go round there as they do seen nice enough, talk this eve has been about caviar lol so????

OP posts:
LeaveTheBastid · 25/08/2013 00:31

I think it's a Saturday night and once a week... So I'd probably personally suck it up.

It would of course be good manners for them to piss off indoors after a certain our though, and you wouldn't be too unreasonable to mention it to them in a lighthearted way if it really is unbearable.

squoosh · 25/08/2013 00:31

YABU

Barbarashop · 25/08/2013 00:34

Wouldn't bother me massively but then I could sleep through a hurricane! Maybe have a polite word.

aquashiv · 25/08/2013 00:35

Shutting the window is usually a good hint. Don't worry it will soon be winter Smile.

chocolateoreos · 25/08/2013 00:40

YANBU. I'm with you on this one. It's really stressful knowing that every weekend there might be noise from parties preventing you going to sleep. Of course people should be able to socialise but why should other people think it's ok to make a lot of noise into the early hours disturbing their neighbours.
Maybe they are of an age where they have little concept of other peoples need for quiet at a reasonable time. If it's only occasionally then that's not so bad but every week.....

Sunnysummer · 25/08/2013 00:41

What is the 'certain time' you're looking for? If they're just chatting without loud music or shouting, then if you want them inside before 10 then YAB a bit U, if it's after that then probably not!

Could you ask for their number so you can drop a text if it's especially loud or late? In any case, the weather will change before we know it, and everyone will be huddled back indoors.

squoosh · 25/08/2013 00:43

They're away during the week so no noise then. It's not like they're playing music loudly, just talking and laughing in their garden. It's still summertime, they're hardly likely to be out there come November.

Foam earplugs from Superdrug work wonderfully and drowning out unwanted noise.

stretch · 25/08/2013 00:46

We have that too op. Loud talking/laughing most weeks, not loud music though thankfully. I have 4 kids though, I like to think we make up for it in the day! Grin

Original poster
cls77 · 25/08/2013 00:52

Squoosh are you my neighbour?!!
I am on call most nights and can be woken by this from 6am, I refuse to wear ear plugs given the fact that I am here with my daughter alone?!! But otherwise would happily "suck it up". The time I would like them to bugger off is 10:30/11pm, and it is mainly the fault of the builders, stupid idea putting a bedroom next to a wall of the neighbours garden!
I know I shouldn't stress as its going to be winter soon but it will all start again in the spring anyway! And they seem the sort to have a bloody chiminea and a outdoor heater in the Garden so a cold night won't bother them?!! Surely a noise is a noise isn't it?
Ironically, I'm in a HA house and they're private, the neighbours the opposite side are always having parties but they are too far from my bedroom for me to care?!!!

OP posts:
squoosh · 25/08/2013 01:06

Not your neighbour although I'm a fan of a chiminea!

I use foam earplugs when my neighbour is loudly imploring her boyfriend to 'fuck her harder'. It saves my sanity.

I think it's a bit much to expect your neighbours to move indoors at 10.30pm considering they aren't even there the rest of the week.

Original poster
cls77 · 25/08/2013 01:21

Squoosh surely that's irrelevant? If its stopping me sleeping then should I let them carry on because they're not doing it during the week?
They are literally outside my bedroom window :(

OP posts:
fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 25/08/2013 01:29

YANBU they should keep it down after 11

squoosh · 25/08/2013 01:30

I don't see it as irrelevant to be honest. No noise during the week, some noise on a Saturday night. I would be pissed off if my neighbour's held parties every night of the week but not pissed off if they held one at the weekend.

It's not their fault you're a light sleeper and it doesn't sound as though they're indulging in anti social behaviour. Besides, they're not psychic, if it's upsetting you this much well then you need to talk to them.

DropYourSword · 25/08/2013 04:56

On a side note Squoosh I read a post of yours on a different thread and you have enlightened me to the BEST insult name EVER!

squoosh · 25/08/2013 13:39

My feathery swear DropYourSword? Go forth and use it liberally! Smile

comingalongnicely · 25/08/2013 14:08

I sympathise, the people out back got a hot tub last year & at one stage were having friends over every Tuesday evening. Last thing you want when you've got to get up at 05:30 is drunk people shouting away until midnight.

Luckily the novelty seems to have worn off now, so I've put my "dog poo catapult" design on hold, plus we (evilly) swapped rooms with our youngest, so he's on that side now (sleeps through anything).

Weekends they'll have the odd bash, but are actually good about being quiet after 11 so I can't complain.

I'd try to mention something in passing if you can "that was a late one" or ask them questions about their overheard conversations "did John ever find out who gave him the clap?", they may take the hint....

KarmaBiatch · 25/08/2013 14:21

I used to live above above a family who's daughter would have parties at the weekend, similar situation to yours..

I LOVED being the nosey neighbour getting out of bed (and creeping ninja style to the bedroom window) to listen to what the yoof of today talked about, a lot of it was Shock as I'm only 10 years older than her!

When I thought it was time to let them know that they could hear me, therefore letting them know that I could hear them, I would feign a loud coughing fit and slam the window shut.. worked a treat Grin

WorraLiberty · 25/08/2013 14:32

You said yourself it's the builder's fault OP

You can't blame your neighbours for wanting to enjoy their garden on a Summer night.

If you won't wear earplugs, close the windows and buy a fan.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 25/08/2013 14:44

You can blame them a bit I think. Any decent person I know would be making an effort to at least speak quietly once it got late

CharlieCoCo · 25/08/2013 14:47

We have neighbours like this too-well their teenage children, not sure where the parents are. Unfortunately their loud chat and laughter is a good night, their music is so ridiculously loud earplugs dont drown out vibration. I could hear their music from back of house over our tele at the front of the house. I was particularly stressed one monday nught when i had to get up at 4:30am and they had very loud clubbing music til 12:30. The vibrations and backbeat makes it hard to sleep. If actual musicians have a noise ban from 11pm neighbours should too, its considerate. Its one thing to talk and socialise in your garden and nice ro hve the space to do that. But theres no need to be shoutinf and being inconsiderate each night, especially when they are quite happy taking money from u to babysit your children! There will also start with their very loud, word inappropriate music at dinner time so the children eat their dinner to fuck my bitch up and the like..it just makes u feel like your getting hgh blood pressure when u live with backbeat vibrations all the time. it doesnt help with the way the houses r built as can hear each others tvs and sneezes too!

Sanctimummy · 25/08/2013 15:28

YABU. It's their garden which they are free to enjoy. If you want silence after a certain hour then buy/rent a detached house.

ILetHimKeep20Quid · 25/08/2013 15:33

I think yabu. We get that your window is next to their garden. That's generally the case unless you're detached with a chunk of land!

Mojavewonderer · 25/08/2013 15:38

I feel for you op! My neighbours were running up and down the street last weekend fighting and screaming at 4am and my husband and I nearly flipped when they started pushing and shoving near our car! It's not normally that bad but it does happen a lot. Thankfully we move in 2 weeks to a much quieter neighbourhood. Phew!

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 25/08/2013 15:45

They might be legally allowed to enjoy it late at night but what happened to just keeping it down a bit?

yummymumtobe · 25/08/2013 15:45

I don't think you are being unreasonable. When you live close to people then you have to show them consideration.