Bastard, Bloody, Buggering Post Office has absolutely F-ing RUINED my birthday. I am Very Very Upset.

[AtYourCervix]

Fuckers.

I am Destroyed. Devastated.

a bit

I've been lying on the sofa watching Harry Potter DVDs and eating my considerable weight in cheese since 9am.

I have an Enormous Loud Barky Ill-mannered Puppy who barks when people approach the front door.

Yet Bastard Postman has still managed to sneak a card through the letterbox saying we weren't in when he/she/it tried to deliver a parcel.

And not just any parcel. MY BIRTHDAY PRESENT PARCEL

I'm working tomorrow so won't even get it until friday.

I am Very Very Upset.

[carolinecordery]

I think the new cards now say Something For You rather than sorry you were out or whatever it was. They go on to say that x couldn't be delivered because it's too big or whatever, not that they had brought it but found you were out. Our postie comes on foot with an over the shoulder bag so he couldn't feasibly carry all the bigger and heavier packages for everyone on the round, but it is bloody annoying. Are they trying to make people go over to the couriers for parcels by not stepping up to the challenge of delivering parcels to people's doors?

[Beastofburden]

This is why I get everything delivered to work.

[Tortoiseonthehalfshell]

A car?????

That's not going to fit through your letterbox.

[Amy106]

Eat chocolate. Lots of chocolate.

[Sokmonsta]

But if it says 'something for you', the option is still there to have re-delivery arranged for another day. Which is pointless if they didn't want to bring it out in the first place. Unless they then send it out with someone else on a van.

I happen to love our postie. He's another one who will do anything to get a parcel delivered. Usually leaves them with a neighbour but sometimes with someone much further up. He knows if I'm in i'll take parcels in for anyone. We're a rural village though and I don't know if that maybe makes a difference as not everyone can get to the little post office two villages over.

Hope you get your present soon ayc.

[biscuitsandcheese]

My posties are great. They do the street on foot with the letters first then drive the van up to the individual houses to deliver the parcels. They always park outside my house because I get a lot of stuff delivered for work.

[InMySpareTime]

Our posties do a letter run on foot about 1pm but if there are parcels these are delivered separately by van at around 8.30am (just as I'm heading on the school run). I have been known to send the DCs to chase the van down the road for parcels!

[Hopasholic]

A car? what do you buy yourself to cheer yourself up if a parcel doesn't arrive at all? A yacht?

[DryCounty79]

Hope you had a good birthday
Look on the bright side- at least you've got a present coming. It was my birthday on Tuesday and I got a big fat nothing. My sis has a card but I won't see her till the weekend. Nothing else from anyone at all. Boo hoo.

[AtYourCervix]

Parcel update.

I have picked up my birthday present parcel.

12 packs of pork scratchings and Dan Browns Inferno.

WHAT THE ACTUAL FLIPPING FLIP WAS HE THINKING??????????

[comingalongnicely]

You're lucky, our post office has decided to shut from 12-2. That's right, the exact time period that every other fucker gets the time to go & collect their bloody parcels.

But they only put the cards through the door for the unimportant ones, all my "signed for" mail seems to get left by my bins!!!

wankers

[Evenstar]

I had a card put through the door when I was at home, and ran out to see a van speeding away. I rang the sorting office and complained, it took 3 attempts to get through as they just wouldn't pick up, and the manager denied that they were leaving the parcels at the office and just taking the cards round. When I went to pick the parcel up I saw a postman heading for his van with a huge handful of red cards

[CSIJanner]

He bought you pork scratchings...?

[BreconBeBuggered]

Pork scratchings and Dan Brown? The postman must be more evil than you thought. He'll be at home spraying himself with perfume and necking Godiva chocolates, you mark my words.

[SaggyOldClothCatPuss]

Ooh! I quite enjoyed Inferno. hate pork scratchings though!

[SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius]

Well, I've already got Inferno, but I do like a pork scratching....

That is a seriously eccentric present, though.

[SueDoku]

I ordered some clothes online, and could choose the delivery day; I chose Tuesday 6th, as I was on holiday until Monday 5th. Confirmation email said delivery was between 7am - 9pm (!) so at 7am I checked the tracker link (which said that it was too early to report) then I sat on the sofa with my front door in full view until 5pm - when I checked the tracker again -- and it said 'We were unable to deliver items on 06/08/13 as no-one was available to take delivery. They have been returned to the delivery office awaiting instructions from the addressee'...!!!! Not even a red card through the door

I rang the complaints department, who just said to go to the DO the next day (helpful..!) and when I did this, I was told that they'd tried to deliver on MONDAY (despite Tuesday's date being on the tracker) and that 'a card was definitely left' ---- NO IT WASN'T..!!

Glad that you got your pork scratchings AtYour - sounds like my idea of a wonderful birthday present - have some belated

[AtYourCervix]

The pork scratchings are fancy ones.

I prefer a Mr Porky. But I haven't told DH that. Bless him.

[TheDoctrineOfPositivityYes]

That's a unique present!

[LovesBeingOnHoliday]

[LayMizzRarb]

Ooh I used to eat pork scratchings by the wheelbarrow full when I was low carbing! Zero carbs!

[SaggyOldClothCatPuss]

We get pork scratchings in at work. They come in huge sacks and we bag them up. There is nothing more nauseating than the smell when you first open the bag!