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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To hand my notice in a week after starting my new job

70 replies

jammiedodger79 · 17/08/2013 19:20

Have started a new job which has turned out not to be anything like what I imagined or what was described to me at the interview. The culture there is to work through unpaid breaks, never to leave on time, also unpaid and to basically be highly stressed from the minute I arrive. I have been told im expected to arrive to start early (unpaid of course). I have a young baby and there is no way i can juggle everything not knowing exactly when i'll be home. For some reason I feel terrible about leaving so soon and am nervous and dreading telling them on Monday. It took a couple of months for the paperwork to be sorted and in that time they could have found somebody else. Has anyone else been in this position? AIBU to leave so soon, or am I being a bit pathetic worrying so much, should i just grow a pair and tell them straight? Any advice on how to approach this?

OP posts:
StuntGirl · 17/08/2013 19:21

Do you have another job to go to?

waddlecakes · 17/08/2013 19:22

Re getting there early and leaving late, how much extra time are you doing in a day compared to what was advertised?

Why is it stressful as soon as you arrive, is it sales or something?

beepoff · 17/08/2013 19:23

Before you hand in your notice you should talk to them and express your concerns and potential solutions to the problem. At least give them the opportunity to fix it.

Rightly or wrongly many companies operate the way you describe.

If you are relying on the income YABU to just walk out. Can you stick at it while you find something else?

GangstersLoveToDance · 17/08/2013 19:23

Do the job under your terms.
Start on time. Finish on time. Take your unpaid breaks.

You may not get any gold stars or promotion bit they probably won't sack you for it.

Original poster
jammiedodger79 · 17/08/2013 19:24

I have, it was going to be bank work as a few extra hours but they can offer me full time hours and I really like this one, its a lot more professional and more in the field of what I'm looking for but I just feel guilty!

OP posts:
Seabright · 17/08/2013 19:25

Is the job in a "long hours" sector? Would they have expected you to realise, because the whole industry is the same?

If not, you need to talk to your manager/HR about it and them work close to your contracted hours.

I think most people expect to do some overtime, when required, but to expected it every day, is generally not on in most sectors.

Maybe your colleagues would welcome you taking a stand that they could follow?

TylerHopkins · 17/08/2013 19:25

Talk to them first before walking out.

LaurieFairyCake · 17/08/2013 19:25

Can't you develop a thicker skin and better boundaries and just get in and leave on time - you're newly hired, now is the time to set out who you are.

At the beginning is the perfect time to practise the phrase 'that's not going to work for me'

Remember as well that you were hired by the hirers and whose to say they are the ones who've set out that culture?

For all we know its just a load of underlings trying to claw their way to the top the only way they know how Wink

Be efficient. Do your job well. And don't cave in to what the others are doing.

mumofweeboys · 17/08/2013 19:29

I worked for a well known budget store and you weren't allowed to leave until you had faced up your section shelves. I was given the largest section as the newbie and was often there 2 hours after closing unpaid of course while everyone else left. I got so cheesed off that I left on time one day then got a rollicking the next day for not finishing. I lasted 2 months before grovelling to the uni I had left to take me back on a different course.

Original poster
jammiedodger79 · 17/08/2013 19:33

I'd say the unpaid hours in a day vary from 1.5- 3 hours. I just know that this other job would suit me much better. It's weird how everybody who works there just gets on with it, its just the way it is there, and I wish I could just walk out on time but its impossible with the things you have to finish before leaving. It's a nursing post and these things really have to be done. I know it happens a lot especially in nursing but I also know there are much better and well run places to work. The way it was described to me at the interview is not anything like the reality. The place also has a bad reputation which I'm worried will follow me in the future. I have moved to the area so had no idea before I took the job.

OP posts:
waddlecakes · 17/08/2013 19:34

So have you secured this other better job? Or are you waiting to be interviewed or...?

YouStayClassySanDiego · 17/08/2013 19:36

I lasted three days in a job earlier this year.

It was the worst job I've ever done, in a day nursery with crap pay , poor staff and dreadful atmosphere.

Don't stay if you can manage without it

alwaysinamuckingfuddle · 17/08/2013 19:36

Can you afford to just leave? If so, I would vote with my feet. Have done the same myself.

If not, do what works for you (i.e. start at contracted time, take breaks, leave at contracted time) and look for another job. All companies have their own unique cultures and if you want to succeed and get on you have to fit in I'm afraid.

Why is it so stressful and necessitating early starts/late finishes?

RedHelenB · 17/08/2013 19:38

If you have a job you prefer then leave & tell them why, it could lead to them being a bit more honest with the next round of applicants. I did gert the impression though that in nursing breaks sometimes were unable to be taken due to circumstances?

Original poster
jammiedodger79 · 17/08/2013 19:39

I have secured the other job. Just waiting for the paperwork. It was going to be one shift a week or as many as I can do but if I leave the one I'm at I will have enough hours there so will be ok financially.

OP posts:
Original poster
jammiedodger79 · 17/08/2013 19:41

From what I can make out there just simply isn't enough staff. But they are not looking to improve staffing levels, just find ways to make the most out of the already over stretched staff. I can see something going wrong, and do think I'm putting myself at risk of being embroiled in something.

OP posts:
waddlecakes · 17/08/2013 19:42

Okay, if you've secured the job then no problem, don't feel sorry at all, tell them first thing Monday. And congrats!

Original poster
jammiedodger79 · 17/08/2013 19:44

I have worked through many breaks in my career, and really don't mind, if its necessary that's fine. But it's like this is just expected as part of the job, every day. And there is still no time to finish everything.

OP posts:
peppapigsmummy · 17/08/2013 19:46

I quit my first job following mat leave after three days. I couldn't bare the idea of working there a minute longer. yanbu..tell them to shuv it.

NorfolkIngWay · 17/08/2013 19:46

Why would you need to arrive early for a Nursing job ?
Arent there set shift change overs Confused
Having said that I would go for the other job -you don't sound like you will be happy in your current post.
Don't worry about offending anyone ,do what is right for you.

Original poster
jammiedodger79 · 17/08/2013 19:47

Thanks waddlecakes :)

OP posts:
PastaBeeandCheese · 17/08/2013 19:48

If you have another job to go to just leave! They don't own you.

FWIW I'm expected to do extra hours unpaid. It's the nature of my industry (lawyer) but I'm lucky in so far as I have a 'virtual office' so can leave on time, collect DD and put her to bed and then start working again. There's no way I could do my job and balance that with DD if I was expected to actually stay on site.

Original poster
jammiedodger79 · 17/08/2013 19:49

The shifts are set that as one shift is supposed to leave the other starts but obviously you need handover etc, so the leaving shift stay late and the starting shift start early. There's no other way around it. I think I haveade up my mind just wish I didn't feel so bad about it!

OP posts:
NorfolkIngWay · 17/08/2013 19:50

Well that is appalling management .
Get out of there- it sounds dreadful !

Hawkmoth · 17/08/2013 19:52

Get out. Tip off the CQC.