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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU or is the cyclist?

29 replies

MogwaiTheGremlin · 13/08/2013 17:21

Just been shouted at by a cyclist so wondering if iabu or he is?

I was walking in the park with DS in his buggy and a load of food shopping. The footpath is split in half - one side for pedestrians and one for cyclists. Obviously I walk on the pedestrian side but there is a very short section of steep hill which I simply cannot push the buggy up. Due to the slope of the hill, the inside (cycle) track is half as steep so after checking carefully both ways I always cross over and use the cycle track for literally 10-20 seconds.

Today (for the first time) a cyclist was coming down the hill and although there was space to pass he braked and came to a stop beside me. I thought he was just being polite and was about to apologise for being on the 'wrong' side when he launched into a tirade calling me stupid and saying I was endangering my baby. He also said I was breaking the rules and he would ring the council to complain

I tried to explain several times but he kept shouting at me and DS was startng to get upset so in the end I just walked away.

So AIBU or is he?

OP posts:

BeauNatt · 13/08/2013 17:23

He was. He'd probably just had a near miss with a lorry and wanted someone to vent at.

gordyslovesheep · 13/08/2013 17:23

he was BU simply by deciding to shout at you and upset your child - you where not blocking his way - he was being a tit

GoofyIsACow · 13/08/2013 17:23

It sounds like he was having a bad day, don't worry about it :)

SoupDragon · 13/08/2013 17:24

You were in the wrong but he was a rude arse.

GoofyIsACow · 13/08/2013 17:24

Sorry i meant that HWBU

GrendelsMum · 13/08/2013 17:24

Oh, I wouldn't worry about it. Sure, you're technically in the wrong, but for practical reasons. Someone shouted at me the other day for doing something similar (the sign says X, but X doesn't actually work in practise, so everyone always does Y), and I've kept on doing the thing that works. (And for what it's worth, on that occasion I was the cyclist and he was the pedestrian.)

And what on earth is the council going to do about it!

KatoPotato · 13/08/2013 17:27

HWBU. Anyone who spouts off about the council at the drop of a hat is sa-aa-aa-dddd!

Original poster

MogwaiTheGremlin · 13/08/2013 17:28

Phew thank you.
Was actually quite upset to be shouted at by a complete stranger and was repeating in my head "crying wont help, crying wont help"!!

OP posts:

MrsLouisTheroux · 13/08/2013 17:29

He was. He'd probably just had a near miss with a lorry and wanted someone to vent at.
Ha!

gobbynorthernbird · 13/08/2013 17:32

He was probably freaked out by nearly hitting you both. He could have really hurt your son, even though he was following the rules. YWbothBU.

beaker25 · 13/08/2013 17:34

I'm a cyclist but would still say he was wrong to shout at you. when using shared access paths you should still be careful of other people, children etc and you should not bring cycling so fast that you risk hitting someone unexpected.

i think the council would just tell him to be carfeul on shared access paths, if anything. sorry he was mean. i will be cycling on Thames path tomorrow and i shall do cheery waves to all walkers to try and make up for it!

VoiceOfRaisin · 13/08/2013 17:35

I am sorry this happened to you.

The cyclist was BU. There is NO excuse for shouting at someone and not listening to them. Your actions sound reasonable and all road users should give way to more vulnerable road users eg technically cars should drive carefully where there are bikes and pedestrians. Of course, RL is not like that and many people feel entitled eg many car drivers feel entitled to the road and "hate" cyclists and don't give them space.

In summary (sorry this is so long) the cyclist should have given way to you, a pedestrian

BUT if you had been walking along the middle of a road for 20 seconds pushing a buggy, I expect (sadly) that a car driver who was held up by your actions would also stop and shout at you. So the cyclist WBU but it is not too surprising. Don't take it personally. Not sure what the answer is for next time you have shopping.....

RhinestoneCowgirl · 13/08/2013 17:37

Hmm, well he could have just been shocked and yelled at you as a reaction, but adding in the bit about phoning the council is a bit much.

lljkk · 13/08/2013 17:44

The person who designed the cycle path was VU. Probably under some daft directive from the govt. It's bad to mix cyclists & pedestrians, but they do it anyway! Most cycle paths are only designed for child cyclists.

He was very, unjustifiably rude, but he's frustrated by badly designed provision.

VivaLeBeaver · 13/08/2013 17:47

He's maybe never had a pushchair to push up a hill and just hasn't thought it through from your point of view.

I'm a cyclist and my first thought was that he'd had to slam his brakes on to miss you and that he's given himself a fright, especially if he was clipped in to his pedals. But then if that's the case he shouldn't have been going so fast on a shared use path.

The only people I'm slightly rude to are those that let their dogs serve in front of me at the last minute!

JumpingJackSprat · 13/08/2013 17:47

Even on a shared path pedestrians have priority so hwbu.

SybilRamkin · 13/08/2013 17:47

He could have been shocked at nearly hitting you, but was still unreasonable to shout at you - he could have spoken to you in a reasonable manner.

However, YWBU in using the cycle lane, and to be honest he was right about you endangering your baby son - if you literally can't walk up that hill with a buggy I would suggest taking an alternative route (i.e. go around the park) even if it's longer. I've seen a cyclist hit a buggy, and it was awful

glenthebattleostrich · 13/08/2013 17:58

Found this

www.devonbybike.co.uk/Cycling-rules-UK.pdf

It depends if it was a path split by a white line. Although, either way he was U. If there was room on the pedestrian side he could easily have gone round you without being an arsehole.

glenthebattleostrich · 13/08/2013 17:58

Damned links, keep forgetting to click

www.devonbybike.co.uk/Cycling-rules-UK.pdf

inallmydays · 13/08/2013 18:03

if it was clearly marked then you were in the wrong.

Fakebook · 13/08/2013 18:07

He also said I was breaking the rules and he would ring the council to complain

I would have laughed at him and told him to jog on!

Ywnbu. Cyclists are the bane of my life.

Woodhead · 13/08/2013 18:15

HWBU shouting at you is a massive over-reaction. It's nice when users keep to the correct sides of divided walkways, but it's unreasonable to expect 100% compliance (and that goes both ways, pedestrians should tolerate cyclists being on the wrong side occassionally as well).

He could well have just had a bad day for near misses though, I was pretty shaken last week to be 1 car length behind a bus clipping a car's wing mirror and front bumper-and not stopping at all. Poor motorist was utterly unable to move (in a queue) and in the correct lane. I find I notice far more dangerous acts (from motorists/pedestrians and cyclists) when cycling than I ever did when driving.

Original poster

MogwaiTheGremlin · 13/08/2013 18:24

I totally accept I was on the wrong side - according to your link Glen it was a 'segregated shared use path' but honestly there wasn't any danger to myself or the cyclist as it is plenty wide enough for us both.
Other people (inc my dh who cycles himself) seem to wander from side to side willy nilly but obviously the path is split for a very good reason so I do stick to my side apart from this small section.
Viva I did suggest he push my buggy up the pedestrian side for me but funnily enough he didn't fancy it! I'm quite strong (relatively!!) so i have no idea how others manage.
Beaker you sound like a lovely cyclist!

OP posts:

whois · 13/08/2013 18:37

He was U to shout at you.

rottentomatoes · 13/08/2013 19:09

He was unreasonable to shout at you.

fakebook Cyclists are the bane of my life.....really?

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