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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think that 'we're free in the afternoon'....

77 replies

namechangesforthehardstuff · 05/08/2013 14:07

...does not mean 'arrive at 12.07'?

Dh has just had emergency surgery and is laid up. Have dd (3) at home. Pils have invited themselves over. Not the best relationship at the best of times because they are such selfish arseholes

So dh said 'we're free in the afternoon' so that I wouldn't have to cook for everyone and lo and behold there they are on the doorstep at sevenminutes past noon. FFS Angry

So have just made a sodding frittata for everyone. How do you even spell frittata? Grrrrrrrrr.

And yes probably AIBU. But they brought a fucking cucumber with them. Who turns up at their child's house after he's just had a fucking operation with a fucking cucumber?

It might prove a vegetable temptation too far...

OP posts:
Beckamaw · 05/08/2013 16:42

Fucking PMSL at the rogue cucumber shot during 'Show me, show me'. GrinGrin

I understand your pain.
When I dropped DD at my Parents' this morning, I was greeted by a grinning father wielding a scrunched up Sainsburys carrier bag.
"A treat for you and your colleagues"! he exclaimed.

A box of mini doughnuts (best before yesterday), and a half eaten bag of squashed apple doughnuts (best before today), complete with 'reduced to 15p' stickers. This was what I presented to my awe struck colleagues.

Nobody has eaten them.

Swap you for a cucumber? Smile

ComtesseDeFrouFrou · 05/08/2013 16:46

Look on the bright side - it was a whole cucumber and it could have gone with the frittata. My MIL brings me the leftovers from her fridge and then expects me to do something with them. Like two florets of cauliflower or three lettuce leaves. Never enough to go round and invariably something that in no way goes with what I am cooking.

Mind you, this is the same woman who offers to make a Christmas cake and then takes three quarters of it home with her Hmm

Sparklingbrook · 05/08/2013 16:56

I want the cucumber curry recipe. Yummy. Grin

SillyBillly · 05/08/2013 16:58

This made me laugh,wonder if the cucumbers were 2for1

Rooners · 05/08/2013 17:09

Make frittata Oh MAKE frittata sung by Katie off CBeebies is now going through my head, thanks to this. Thankyou for that.

Re the washing up, she will have nudged him and said 'Go on Derek. Wash something!'

Rooners · 05/08/2013 17:11

My mum once brought round some muffins she had made. I asked why suspiciously

she said she had made them for the ladies at church, but sadly during the grating of a nutmeg, she had accidentally grated off part of her thumb, and was worried that it might harm her lunch club clients.

I politely declined but she surreptitiously fed them to the dcs when I wasn't looking.

It was disgusting. I'm sure they were fine but boak.

HibernoCaledonian · 05/08/2013 17:11

I had emergency surgery a while ago. Day after I got out of hospital MIL called over with...

2 chickens and 2 melons

pollywollydoodle · 05/08/2013 17:18

last visit mil brandished an egg slicer, a mini screwdriver kit and a pop up laundry basket Confused for no reason other than that she had been to the 98p shop (yes there's a war between the £, 99p and 98p shops which caused huge anticipation of bargains in mil)

i'm also for outweirding them...i'll loan you the egg slicer to make cucumber ribbons. serve with chopsticks

Original poster
namechangesforthehardstuff · 05/08/2013 17:22

Oh God yeah the taking stuff home...

Like after dds little welcome party when she sidled up at the end and said 'now what shall I take?' Despite having brought nothing.

They have gone though! I threatened them with rush hour and the M25.. Thank God for that road and its shitness.

OP posts:
baggyb · 05/08/2013 17:28

My MIL and her hubby showed up for a big family buffet on New Year's Day with pickled onions...that he'd pickled himself...in an old, scabby beet root jar. V proud of themselves!

HeartsTrumpDiamonds · 05/08/2013 17:30

OP you have made me SMILE on a very rainy dreary afternoon - thank you!

Sparklymommy · 05/08/2013 17:34

Read this thread completely and giggled the whole way through! My mil never brings me anything vaguely as interesting as a cucumber. Home grown or otherwise! Love it! I also am all for the out wierding them. I have a fancy kitchen thin that would make cucumber spirals to go with tomato roses.

Oblomov · 05/08/2013 17:52

Loving your posts Op. Trying to think who you are ........ Hmm

starfishmummy · 05/08/2013 18:14

Polly, I wonder if we have the same mil!!!

Original poster
namechangesforthehardstuff · 05/08/2013 18:29

Thanks everyone for making this afternoon bearable. Might do this again next time they come in November it was loads of fun - even more so than surreptitiously videoing them and then using the Action Movie app to blow them up...

Thank God for all your shit PILS and their egg slicers and chicken melon surprises...

OP posts:
Marcheline · 05/08/2013 18:55

OP I love you.

I've just been feeling glum about having to attend MILs wedding hell this month. Your OP actually made me snort rosé out of my nose (yes, rosé. Its medicinal and may or may not be linked to the wedding of the year). Your ILs are b

I am definitely getting the action movie app!

Marcheline · 05/08/2013 18:59

Where did half of the end line of my second paragraph go?!

I think I was saying that they're bonkers. Which you obviously know already.

Must stop drinking rosé.

SuffolkNWhat · 05/08/2013 19:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ComtesseDeFrouFrou · 05/08/2013 19:06

OP are you serious?! Grin

I'm going straight to the App Store to buy the action man app in preparation for PILs next visit. I'm 31 weeks pg and they wanted to come and stay in the middle of the working week for 4 days when I'll be 36 weeks. Bless him, DH didn't bat an eyelid or look at me before telling MIL immediately that they couldn't stay. He's great Smile

Original poster
namechangesforthehardstuff · 05/08/2013 19:16

I just went downstairs and DH had (at dd's request) top and tailed the cucumber and DD was eating it like a banana. It's about half as big ss she is. PMSL and am awestruck by prescience of MN.

OP posts:
WillYouDoTheFandango · 05/08/2013 19:23

I am immensely proud as that was my suggestion! Grin my inlaws just being their own wine as apparently they got fed up of me only offering tea at 10am on a Sunday

formicadinosaur · 05/08/2013 19:27

Was it that kind if op? Wink wink. Maybe they could have delivered a couple if plums to go with the cucumber?

Original poster
namechangesforthehardstuff · 05/08/2013 19:54

Action Movie app is awesome. But nothing beats MN. Thanks fandango Wink

OP posts:
HibernoCaledonian · 05/08/2013 22:57

It gets better. DH put the chickens in the freezer (I hadn't seen them) and I decide tonight to get one of them out to defrost for dinner tomorrow. They were in one package and they were stuck together!!! I had to hack them apart with a knife to put one back in the freezer. :/

SarahAndFuck · 05/08/2013 23:21

Show Me Show Me...cucumber! Grin

You need to put that cucumber on your profile OP, so we can all marvel at it.

I have no idea how you might go about currying one though, not without ending up with disintegrated mush.

This thread has reminded me about the argument I had with someone coming to do maintenance at our house. They gave me a morning appointment and by 12:30pm they had not appeared. I rang to find out why and was told"

Company: But you have a morning appointment and it's still morning, he is on his way.
Me: It's not morning, it's the afternoon.
Company: No, it's not.
Me: It's 12:30pm. Pee Em! That's the afternoon.
Company: Our morning slots run until one o clock.
Me: That's the afternoon! I took the morning off work!
Company: We give morning slots to one o clock.
Me: Are you saying one o clock to avoid saying PEE EM?
Company: I'm not going to answer that.

If your in-laws worked for that company you wouldn't have seen them before 2pm OP. Which would have been like noon on their planet.