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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to smash it to pieces

29 replies

AlwaysDancing1234 · 02/08/2013 22:51

DP is obsessed with a computer game and it's driving me insane! He has played it solidly without a break for the last 3 hours. I worked out in the last 24 hours he has played it for about 8 hours in total. I just asked him (again) to please turn it off as its getting ridiculous, he grunted. I said does he not think 8 hours out of 24 is too much (no) and can we please have a conversation (grunt). AIBU to be absolutely furious and want to smash the bloody thing. (I know that's not the right thing to btw, just wish I could!)

OP posts:
Sparklingbrook · 02/08/2013 22:54

Is your DP 14?

PoppadomPreach · 02/08/2013 22:56

is the game called "Mumsnet"?

NotYoMomma · 02/08/2013 22:57

minecraft? glances at dh playing

LuisSuarezTeeth · 02/08/2013 22:57

YANBU

Would you like to borrow my hammer?

FunnysInLaJardin · 02/08/2013 22:58

i was thinking Minecraft but then DS1 is 7 and not a husband or father

mrscumberbatch · 02/08/2013 22:59

Not on.... if he's doing it in his 'own time' fine. But to have played it for 8 hours means he isn't contributing to your family today at all.

DP is avid gamer but knows that kids/I come first.

fuzzpig · 02/08/2013 22:59

YANBU

YoniBottsBumgina · 02/08/2013 23:00

What game is it?

Gaming should be treated like any other hobby IMO. It can get addictive and that seems to be used as an excuse, but that's not really fair or true. It shouldn't be impacting on his responsibilities - ie looking after DC or working. It wouldn't bother me if my DP had an evening on his game but it would if it was every evening IYSWIM? If he's filling all of his spare time with the game so that he doesn't have time for you, that's not on. But saying "I've arranged to play a few raids tonight so I'll be out of action" is akin to saying "I'm going for a few drinks tonight after work" or "I'm going to the gym tonight" or going out to do any other hobby, it's just he's doing it in the house.

I'd rather have a gaming DP (and I do and he manages to make time for everything else perfectly well) than a football obsessed one.

MrsTerryPratchett · 02/08/2013 23:00

Call of bastarding wankfest Duty?

Branleuse · 02/08/2013 23:01

WoW?

Elsiequadrille · 02/08/2013 23:01

That's ridiculous at his age. Obviously I don't know his age, but am guessing he is an adult.

Original poster
AlwaysDancing1234 · 02/08/2013 23:04

Thanks for confirming its not just me who thinks this is not on! He did help with some stuff around the house today but seems to think this entitles him to then ignore me and DC for several hours either side. (rage rage) It's not Mindcraft, it's some sort of sci-fi game. Send me that hammer!

OP posts:
MammaTJ · 02/08/2013 23:04

Arf at is it mumsnet. Mumsnet does not take over the shared TV. It is something I do while also watching TV!! ANything DP can to while doing that is up to him, but if he wants to take over the TV, he can jog on!!

Sparklingbrook · 02/08/2013 23:05

Is he online on the game? Turn the router off?

MacaYoniandCheese · 02/08/2013 23:06

Leave the Bastard.

UnexpectedStepmum · 02/08/2013 23:06

My DH is currently obsessively playing eight concurrent games of online Scrabble (sigh). I am bearing with it though as he will get bored in about a week and move on. Does your DP ever reach saturation point with games?

BellEndTent · 02/08/2013 23:07

YANBU. My DH stopped playing his Playstation (of his own accord) when our first child was born. He doesn't have time for that kind of thing anymore. Grin

Original poster
AlwaysDancing1234 · 02/08/2013 23:08

He is an adult, mid 30's and also plays Call of Duty (another candidate for the hammer). This is some sci-fi game he downloaded on to the iPad. He must have realised I was furious as game is now off. Shall I stay on Mumsnet chat for 3 hours to teach him a lesson?!

OP posts:
MacaYoniandCheese · 02/08/2013 23:08

Mumsnet is educational, anyway. Not in the same category at all .

SummerHoliDidi · 02/08/2013 23:08

Dp does this. So do I (although my game is mn rather than an actual game). Are we weird? We both think it's fine as long as the kids are sorted and there's no immediate crisis.

WafflyVersatile · 02/08/2013 23:09

dwarf fortress?

YoniBottsBumgina · 02/08/2013 23:12

This is what you should do tomorrow.

Get up when the DC get up. Make their breakfast and get up and dressed.

Wake DP up (since he will have gone to bed at 4am or something stupid) and brightly announce "Right, my turn today then. I'm out shopping. Anything you want me to pick up when I'm in town? DC have had breakfast, so they're all yours. Have fun!"

Stay out for the same amount of hours as he has spent on his game. If he looks for a row when you get back, make it really clear that you expect the same amount of leisure time as he does, and if he thinks it's fine to check out of family life for hours, then you get to do the same. Hopefully it will be a bit of a wake up call for him.

YoniBottsBumgina · 02/08/2013 23:13

Summer - yes it is fine if you both take equal responsibility for the DC when doing so. Not okay to just ignore them and expect your partner to do everything.

Original poster
AlwaysDancing1234 · 02/08/2013 23:17

Summer - it's fine if you both agree its fine if you see what I mean! I don't object to some time spent on games but not hours when I can't even get a yes or no reply when I ask a question. He gets so involved in the game that a gang of naked supermodels could walk in the room and I doubt he would notice.
Maca - love your comment about MN being Educational!

OP posts:
LuisSuarezTeeth · 02/08/2013 23:18

To be serious for a m