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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To tell my Mother its 20 bloody 13!!

63 replies

GhostsInSnow · 31/07/2013 19:14

DS left home earlier this year, apparently (according to my Mother) it's still my job to make sure he's suitably attired for work. I pointed out he was a big boy and independent and it was up to him now. This apparently means I have no Maternal Instinct and I'm failing him. I did tell her that tbh I'd be more embarrassed about raising a child who wasn't as independent as my boy but her selective hearing ignores this.

She then went on to ask if I'd ironed a shirt he needed for tomorrow. I replied I hadn't, if he needed one he can iron. She asked if his GF had ironed it. Again I told her no, DS knows where the iron is and how to use it. My Mother then replied that "but he can't iron like a woman'.

So there you have it, I'm a bad Mother because I don't interfere in my boys life and men can't iron. I think my calendar must be wrong by a few decades...

OP posts:

DalekInAFestiveJumper · 01/08/2013 07:12

She'd be disturbed by my Dad! He's 76 and he would be horrified at the idea of anybody touching his precious iron. Dad was military for 20+ years, and got damned good at picture perfect uniforms.

RubyGoat · 01/08/2013 07:18

I rarely iron. Am very careful to hang clothes up to dry to minimise creases. The last thing I ironed was a bridesmaid dress I wore when I was 7 weeks pregnant (lucky as I tried it the next weekend - it didn't fit). DD is now 15 months old. I am a slattern, according to my mother.

WandaDoff · 01/08/2013 07:21

It was a woman like your DM, that made my Father into the irresponsible manchild that he was. I don't think he ever lifted a finger for himself.

He was Nan's little prince, & he stayed that way. It drove my Mum nuts.

My boys have been taught how to look after themselves.

Flobbadobs · 01/08/2013 09:19

Now I do iron. Aslong as theres wine in the fridge and something good on the tv I can whip through a basket fairly quickly. Good job really as I hate doing it and tend to leave everything until the basket overloads... DH works mad hours and is away a lot so I do it. Eventually.
I'm teaching DS to iron at the moment, it's a bit of a PITA as he's lefthanded and I can't do anything useful lefthanded at all, it's harder than I thought trying to switch everything around in my head and on the board!
DD will learn when she can reach the ironing board safely.
MIL thinks I'm mad, she adores ironing and nothing is safe when the board is out...

hackmum · 01/08/2013 09:29

Charlie: "Weirdly my late Dad did national service so if a shirt was needed when I was a kid he did it because he could do military creases to perfection."

My dad too - he was a brilliant ironer as a result of military service, much better than I am. He was widowed young but always immaculately turned out with perfectly ironed shirts and trousers.

Original poster

GhostsInSnow · 01/08/2013 09:46

breathe I'm an only child, rather thankful for that actually because I can imagine if I'd had a brother his poor wife would be serving jail time now.

She's a strange sort my Mum with ironing though, she irons socks and pants. I've even caught her ironing the duvet on the bed. My philosophy is if it doesn't shake out when it comes out of the tumble dryer then you don't need to wear it.

DH actually has a couple of work shirts from M&S which do just that, they don't need ironing at all. I love them with all my heart

OP posts:

MamaChubbyLegs · 01/08/2013 10:10

I don't even OWN an iron. I just hang everything when wet, and it dries straight! (In fact, I don't even do that - DP does it ) We don't wear shirts in this household though. If that ever changes, DP can buy an iron to iron his shirts!

RubyGoat · 01/08/2013 10:31

Reading this thread has made me realise, I'm not sure where the iron is... no doubt covered in dust at the back of a cupboard.

Didactylos · 01/08/2013 11:10

I have found my tribe
I do not iron, on principle. I can iron, and if the garment or occasion demands it will pull out the stops, but that's as far as it goes. Everything is non iron or hung so that it does not crease- my time at home is too limited and valuable to waste time flattening things that will just become crumpled again anyway. I dont iron for DP and DS will be taught as soon as hes old enough to be trusted not to burn marks into the carpet (..'because, look, triangles mummy!')

Original poster

GhostsInSnow · 01/08/2013 11:18

I'm probably strange in the fact I refuse to line dry as well, in fact I don't actually own a washing line.

There's only 3 of us home now so we don't generate mountains of washing, in fact what we use can be tumbled in one load. The way I see it is I can either peg it out, fetch it in when it rains, hang it on the rads, peg it out again etc or, I can shove the lot in the tumble drier and 70 minutes later its dry and crease free.
Mother also thinks this is very very wrong .

DD(15) cooks dinner as well probaly once a week, she enjoys it and she makes a mean Spag Bol. Regardless I know that when I unleash them into the world they can stand on their own two feet. Of course I'll be there to help should they ever need me, but I'm not going to insert myself into their lives to do their washing/cleaning/ironing etc

OP posts:

Callani · 01/08/2013 11:23

I love the assumption that men can't iron - I was taught to iron by my uncle who'd been in the Marines. Never quite lived up to his standard though!

shewhowines · 01/08/2013 11:28

Of course men aren't as capable as us. You're a bad mother.

burberryqueen · 01/08/2013 11:31

yes my long-term on off ex BF irons everything in sight and will not go out without an ironed shirt. - you can spot a man who is ex-forces or ex-con a mile off!

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