to think my friend's plan is a little ... unusual?

[WestieMamma]

She has decided to reduce the amount offered to her son at feeds because she is worried about his weight and the fact that obesity runs in her family. He's on the 50th percentile for length and the 75th for weight which she feels is too big a difference. He's 5 months old.

My first thoughts were shock and 'you can't put a baby on a diet'. But she's a nurse which makes me wonder if she's better informed than me and it's the right thing to do. The reason I want to know what others think is that my little tubbles is on the 40th for length and the 95th for weight, so should I be doing the same. (I wasn't worried until she told me her plan)

Nurse or not, she's being ridiculous.

What's she going to do if he's crying with hunger, just ignore him?

It's a crazy idea. Ignore it.

I think once they get mobile, their bodies change completely. My DS1 was a chunkster, but ny the time he was 3.5, he had a mini six pack and was (and still is) very active.

Any reduction in food at 5 months is foolhardy. Nurse or no nurse.

This doesn't sound right

People in the medical profession aren't always right

Does she even work with babies/child nutrition?

In my experience most babies even chubby ones slim down a lot once they become more active I really wouldn't worry about my child being overweight at five months unless it was raised as an issue by someone trained in that field

I think she's planning on feeding him if he cries but to just not feed him as much . I'm not sure how she plans to put that into action as she got quite defensive when I asked.

Oh Lord, I cannot abide the idea of a hungry baby. I thought babies pretty much self limited, when they are full they stop eating? My babies were fed on demand. They are all in normal to low weight range.
YANBU as far as I can tell..

She is mad.

There is no point worrying about babies weight. Once they become mobile most of it all falls off.

My dd was referred to a specialist because she was supposedly huge at 6 months (sshe was 7lbs when born). They didn't do or recommend anything so I carried on feeding on demand etc and now she is 10 years old and skinny as anything.

Ds now 13 months is the same. He is currently in age 2-3 year old clothes. He was only 6lbs when he was born!

Some babies do just put on a lot of weight easily. But usually they do lose it just as easily.

I wouldn't, I think restricting intake is a bad idea. However, if you are FF, I would make sure you are not "encouraging" baby to finish the bottle past the point where they are full.
One centile different between height and weight really doesn't sound a lot. Are her issues about weight playing a part? Is she otherwise coping ok?

YANBU, sounds like a bad idea.

That is the most bonkers thing I have ever heard. She is bonkers. Babies eat when they're hungry and stop when they're full. I actually can't bear the thought of a hungry infant, I find it really upsetting that she's planning this.

Please don't worry about your baby. Centiles are the normal range - someone has to be at the top and someone has to be at the bottom.

She's likely to be in for some sleepless nights if her son is like mine was - we were accidentally not feeding him enough when he was about 7 months old and he was sleeping really poorly, it wasn't until I got good advice and fed him more that he slept better.

I agree with above posters. I would also be worried that if she is this concerned about her 5 month old babies weight, what is she going to be like when the child grows up! I know someone who's mother actually had a lock on the fridge when she was 12 so she couldn't eat anything.

I'm not professional, but think babies and small children need to learn to recognise when their hunger is sated, and they can only learn to listen to that in a relaxed environment where they effectively decide. I may have a warped view based on my ds though, I know some kids are naturally greedier/fussier, but he is naturally slim and stops eating the second he's had enough even if it's his favourite. I wish I'd been raised that way.
Chubby babies change as soon as they are mobile anyway.

YANBU. If obesity runs in her family she should be making plans now for healthy eating for the whole family and focus on starting that at weaning (as in healthy home cooked meals as opposed to starving the poor mite). She should also chat to her DH/DP and agree on how to bring up their family to embrace and encourage exercise/outdoor active lifestyle and avoid too much TV/video games...

If she is already restricting her little ones feeds now, it sounds like she could be creating big problems and negative associations with food for the little one (if this carries on long enough).

A few doctors and nurses I know are overweight and/or drink too much. Just because she's a health professional doesn't mean she knows better.

She's projecting her issues with weight on to a tiny baby.

She needs to speak with her HV, yesterday. It sounds like she needs support and its manifesting itself as this weight "issue".

Please talk to her. Tell her you're worried about her and baby and encourage her to talk to her HV ASAP.

If FF I can see that maybe making up a smaller bottle could be a good idea - one of the reasons that FF children gain more weight is that if you say make up a 6oz bottle, but they stop being interested at 5oz, the temptation is to shake the bottle a bit, wiggle it around their mouth and encourage them to take the last bit - akin to finishing what is on the plate and overriding saitity messages. If you make up 5oz bottles and just make more if they are still hungry would reduced the amount consumed. If bf then wouldn't usually overfeed in same way as not many bf women are mad enough to try to rouse a baby in the post bf-daze. Trying to delay feeds would just lead to a grumpy baby.

She's being daft. As someone above said, babies feed when they're hungry and stop when they're full, they haven't yet been conditioned to do anything else, and once the baby is mobile things will change.

My DS has always been fairly slim, despite eating buckets, but my little brother was really chubby when we were kids. Now he's a healthy, slim young man. Plus, both of us used to naturally chunk up before a growth spurt. Mum used to say it was because we had to grow out before we grew up!

My point is a little extra weight is ok for kids.

"one of the reasons that FF children gain more weight is that if you say make up a 6oz bottle, but they stop being interested at 5oz, the temptation is to shake the bottle a bit, wiggle it around their mouth and encourage them to take the last bit"

Do people do this? That's nuts. :(

(Didn't mean when FF you are mad to rouse a child - they are acting on society norms not to waste food, bf woman has no point of reference about whether they have given 5 or 6 oz, so asume the baby is full and are generally just relieved that the child is asleep)

Most people aren't mad enough to try and wake a baby from a bottle fed daze either

OP the baby will be very unsettled and I imagine the hv will say something if the baby isn't putting on weight. You just carry on feeding your baby as you are, as someone else said someone has to be at the top and someone had to be at the bottom!

Yes Murder seen it personally and also based on research - people think they will fill them up more and delay next meal but will instead override natural instinct - in the same way as telling a child to finish what is on their plate does looking at you school lunchtime assistants

:( Poor babies.

Being a nurse means she is able to follow instruction and care for sick people. It does not make her a doctor, and it does not give her special knowledge regards to child rearing and feeding. She is ridiculous.

That's one stupid nurse.