Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

or is it the most selfish and rudest thing to think you're entitled to take up two seats at rush hour??!!

51 replies

Silverb1rch · 30/07/2013 17:38

Just that really. I get the train to and from work every day and it's amazing how many times I have to ask someone 'Can I sit there?' after they've sat on the end seat or dumped their small bag next to them. I can understand if the train is empty but at packed rush hour?! Everyone ends up standing near the doors! Why does anyone have a right to take up two seats???!! Arghhh! (Can you tell I've just got off the train!;))

OP posts:
ZolaBuddleia · 30/07/2013 17:43

Worse than the bag dumpers are the men whose genitals are so enormous they can't possibly sit with their legs together and only occupy one seat.

thebody · 30/07/2013 17:45

it's soooo rude. just tell them to move or better sit on their bag.

IrisWildthyme · 30/07/2013 17:49

Surely you don't resent the tiny tiny effort of saying "please may I sit there" do you? The person who gets on first is perfectly entitled to choose an aisle seat if they prefer it.

If someone actually refuses to let you into the window seat, YANBU and they are being an arse.

But if you expect everyone who gets on first to go for getting squashed in the window seat (much more cramped than the aisle seat) and let the later-boarders get the nicer more comfy aisle seats, then YABU.

Justforlaughs · 30/07/2013 17:52

YANBU, I don't mind people choosing the aisle seat (I much prefer to sit by the window myself), I don't even mind people putting their bags on the empty seat, but I do mind having to ask them if they will move their things. I always do this, even if there are empty seats (next to people) available, just to piss them off! Wink

Original poster
Silverb1rch · 30/07/2013 17:52

ZolaBuddleia.. That's exactly the kind I was sitting next to once I'd actually found a seat!

OP posts:
FruOla · 30/07/2013 17:55

I'll quite often plonk my bag on the next seat whilst I settle myself, but once I'm sorted then I plonk my bag on my lap.

After all, I haven't bought a ticket for my handbag/shopping.

People who do this - and give you dirty looks when you ask them to move their bags are rude, rude, rude.

AaDB · 30/07/2013 17:57

When a train is so obviously, packed you shouldn't have to ask anyone to move belongings taking up an unpaid seat. Angry Angry

AmandaCooper · 30/07/2013 17:59

It's not the most selfish and rudest thing. It's annoying but tbh I've done it myself - albeit never on a busy train.

StuntGirl · 30/07/2013 17:59

"I always do this, even if there are empty seats (next to people) available, just to piss them off!"

Why? I always chuck my bag on the seat next to me if there are two seats free. It's just easier. If someone needs to sit there I'll shift it.

I would think you were a loon.

LyraSilvertongue · 30/07/2013 18:01

I'll always put my bag on the next seat if the train/bus isn't busy but the minute it looks like that seat may be needed I'll put it on my lap. I'd expect others to do the same.

Original poster
Silverb1rch · 30/07/2013 18:02

IrisWildthyme I don't particularly resent it, just think it's unecessary. Maybe because I would never take up two seats if the train was busy, I don't expect other people to do the same.

On the train the other day was a woman sitting with her back to the window with her feet up in front of her on the seat next to her. If that's not ridiculous I don't know what is!

OP posts:
Ginocchio · 30/07/2013 18:10

stuntgirl It's different if you know someone will want to sit there though, on a rush hour train.

Thankfully I don't have to commute on the train very often, but I'm amazed at how surprised and put out people seem to be when I ask them to move their bag - making a big display of gathering up their things & finding somewhere to put it, as though they didn't for one minute expect to have someone sit next to them.

minibmw2010 · 30/07/2013 18:14

I just always say 'excuse me please' as it's clear that they then have to move it, but I'm not going to ask permission as such to sit on a train I've paid for.

Original poster
Silverb1rch · 30/07/2013 18:26

So the general consensus is that I'm NBU? :).. First AIBU out of the way and I've survived! Thanks guys!

OP posts:
nannynewo · 30/07/2013 19:10

I was on a train once where a woman placed her dog on a seat and refused to move the dog for someone to sit down!! Even though she had only purchased one ticket.

Another time a hen party came on the train and asked me to move from my seat (which was reserved) and go and sit on a table seat with 3 other strangers (making one woman with a disability get up and move) just so they could sit next to each other. Me being young and innocent said yes! worst decision ever. The worst bit was that the hen party were only then on the train for ten minutes!

Some people can be so rude!

nannynewo · 30/07/2013 19:11

Oh I forgot to add, YANBU! Those people really annoy me!

SkinnybitchWannabe · 30/07/2013 19:13

My arse is so big I dont need a bag to put on the other seat Sad

expatinscotland · 30/07/2013 19:13

I agree, Zola, men whose balls need one seat and their legs another are my pet peeve.

expatinscotland · 30/07/2013 19:15

Then they spend the journey with their leg touching yours. Eewww.

Twostep · 30/07/2013 19:21

I love it when foreigners (or those just not posessing the rediculous British apologetic tone) just march up and tell them to move their bag!

I usually sidle up 'excuse me, but could you possibly just move your bag/case/cat/dog/lollypop/huge fat arse over just a little bit for me to sit down please...?' They always give their bag the nice window seat too them huff, roll their eyes to suck their teeth as they give you the death stare and slowly haul their tiny but obviously extremely heavy/valuable bag onto their lap.

I loath commuting. Especially when you get a sweaty armpit in your face

CuthbertDibble · 30/07/2013 19:22

YANBU.

My worst one was a man saving a seat for his girlfriend, it was standing room only apart from this one seat. Wouldn't have been quite so bad if she was running down the platform and about to board the train, but no, she wasn't due to board until the next station down the line.

I made him move and told him he could give up his seat for her when she got on.

justanuthermanicmumsday · 30/07/2013 19:29

when I was a student the train i used was never full always lots of empty carriages. So i would sit in the window seat take shoes off and put feet on other seat and snooze for 1 hour, i was usually on 6.30am. i don't think this was bad since it was empty? Was it? Maybe it was bt after 1 ur of politeness i thght to hell with it 2 more years of commuting on a ghost train why not. Conductor didnt mind, i didn't put dirty shoes on seat I'd alway take them off.

I would never do it if there were a fair few ppl near me or it was busy, just it was never ever busy.

when the train was cancelled as it often was I'd lie on the back seat of the coach it was empty actually half the coach was. at the last stop the driver would wake me up bless him lol. I'd never put shoes on seats.

I have experienced packed trains to London and i know what u mean about asking ppl to move their bags shouldn't have to. once th train is moving if no one is sat there i don't se the problem. But if its a regular route and u know its going to get busy just use the rack above your head.

MsPickle · 30/07/2013 19:40

YANBU

But then I also think that on busy trains/buses small children should be scooped onto laps, even if heading towards too big, rather than occupying a seat.

And I also think empty umbrella fold pushchairs should be folded on buses which I know is contentious.

Twostep · 30/07/2013 20:00

Don't start me on people puting their mucky shoes on the seat!

gnittinggnome · 30/07/2013 20:41

For true ick it's people clipping their fingernails on public transport that utterly grosses me out... Yeuch.

For the men with painful, swollen balls, I just let my leg relax against their's and occasionally twitch - they usually get the message.

I just got my first ever "Baby on Board" transport for London badge, will see if that makes any difference at all!

Oh and YANBU!