To shake up his Irn Bru?

[abigboydidit]

Typing on phone and in rush so apols for typos. My neighbour loves practical jokes and is a bit of a knob! An hour or so ago I was walking with DD in the buggy and a white van swerved into the gutter next to us, covering us with the contents of a huge puddle . It then drove off, beeping its horn.

Shortly after I received a text from his current girlfriend, who was mortified. They work together and he had told her what he had done last time he was at base. She may not be is girlfriend much longer..

Anyway, se offered to let me use their office kitchen to get dried off and make myself a cuppa. I am there now.

There is a can of Irn Bru in the fridge with his name on and a mars bar. I assume its for his tea break.

His girlfriend is at the front desk serving customers..

Or should I maintain the moral high ground?

Go for it, shoogle it good lady!

Shake it, shake it!! I would

report him for bloody dangerous driving - he deliberately swerved INTO the gutter? he could have mounted the pavement! Hilarious

oh and eat his mars bar too

Do it, please

If only I knew where he would open it. The kitchen here is v nice and tidy. Actually that probably answers it as am guessing it wouldn't look this pristine if several mucky workies were hanging around here in their boiler suits!

Gah his girlfriend has taken her tea break early to chat. I may have missed my window. Pretending to text my husband so will be off radar for a wee while..

I'd take a bite from the mars bar myself. And shake the pop!

Do it, do it, do it

Actually - if you shape it up, it will go all over the place and some poor bugger will need to clear it up! If he's a twit, he won't do it will he?

Open it, wee into it through a tiny funnel, then get a tiny little soldering iron and seal it up again.

Alternatively, give it a big shake.

I hate practical jokers, they generally use their japes to cover up the fact they don't actually have a sense of humour.

Shake it up.

He deserves it

Don't bother shaking it, take it as compensation for almost being run over. Eat the Mars Bar.
It will come in handy the next monster hangover you have.

do a dance while you do it AND THEN PUT IT BACK IN THE FRIDGE UPSIDE DOWN AND THEN LICK THE MARS BAR

oh no sure why i shouted all that

Do it.
And replace the Mars Bar (in the wrapper) with a big juicy dog turd. (Surely there must be one of those hanging about in your local park)

I have shaken and left. I feel a tiny bit guilty.

But not very.

Shake the can, nibble around the mars bar and lick it. Also report him for driving into the gutter and deliberately splashing you. On the RAC website - "Motorists caught committing the offence can be prosecuted under the 1988 Road Traffic Act for selfish or aggressive behaviour on the road. Those convicted may also see an increase in their car insurance premiums".

He did what??

Omg - what an arsehole!!

DidoTheDodo must admit I thought of that too but wasn't brave enough to post it lol :)

That's not a practical joke - that's just being a dick.

I came on here to say it would be sacrilege to do that to an Irn Bru, but actually you should have just taken the whole lot (the bastard doesn't deserve that glorious orange fizz) and chomped on that mars bar while you reported his dangerous driving.

SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE SHAKEY SHAKE IT
i wouldve smsshed his mars bar aswell so its in shards.ha.

Text just in from girlfriend! Will try to copy and paste.

Big man must b on ur side lol. Paul just emptyd can o ginger over Colin an he aint best chuffed. Is actin daft like no his fault but wan 2 many jokes 2day I rekon. Payback 4 uz lol xxx