To never buy my DP a present again?

[Booboostoo]

I quite like a family tradition of giving and receiving gifts so DP and I have always given each other surprise gifts for Christmas and our birthdays. The monetary value of the gift does not bother me at all, more the thought behind it, and I honestly enjoy the giving bit a lot (I think about possible gifts long and hard, plan out the surprise, and enjoy seeing DP enjoy receiving them).

Last year was DP's 40th and as he always likes openning a lot of presents I got 18 of them and arranged them around our bed before I woke him up. Two were 'proper' presents and the rest were small things, little jokes, etc. He had a great time tearing the miles of wraping paper all over the bed.

This year it was my 40th. DP got me 7 lie-in vouchers. Now this is a sore point for a number of reasons. I do all the early mornings (weekdays and weekends) and even if DP is doing something with DD, I get up to get her washed, fed, dressed, etc. DP only sorts himself out in the mornings. As you can imagine this is a sore point in our relationship and we have argued about it in the past. So I feel like he has gifted me something that he should be doing anyway. Also, 7 is a pityful number. If he was to really make amends he could have gifted me 52 lie-ins so we could have one each every weekend. I haven't used any of the vouchers as frankly they piss me off.

So, would I be unreasonable never to buy him a present again? I enjoy our family tradition and don't want to give up on it, but I can't quite motivate myself to think about Christmas this year.

Dontmind I have tried that talk a couple of times, it gets me nowhere! He promises to change, maybe gets round to one lie-in for me and that's the end of that. I either have to laugh about this or get seriously pissed off, so laugh it is I suppose.

I think it's the same for any issue where partners/spouses really and genuinely don't see eye to eye. I am a de-clutterer and want-to-be minimalist, but DH is a hoarder. No matter how many meaningful conversations we have about it he will always be a Hoarder and I will always want to throw things out!
You just need to decide how important total agreement on these things is to you.
We have achieved a compromise on this but not due to calm conversations more due to me having meltdowns when it all gets too much and him seeing how much the clutter gets me down.

Sorry to repeat myself, but I still think you should use the vouchers for a lie in at a hotel with a friend

You shouldn't have one off lie ins, and you need to fight this battle weekly for about a month, agree which day you are having (go for Saturday, that way if something happens you can't have your day, you can declare it a swop), and insist on it. Remind him on Friday night. Do the same next Friday, with an assumption this is happening, so next Friday after getting your lie in this weekend, say "I'd like Saturday for my lie in this weekend, unless you'd rather I take Sunday"- note, you keep assuming he means it. You are not asking for more lie ins, you are expecting each week you will have one.

Keep this up for a month at least, habit forming time, not just for your dp, but you need to get out of the habit of thinking of a lie in as a special treat, you need to get as entitled as your dp is.

What Dontmind said. Say it as if it is a done deal. If he doesn't shift then plonk kids on him and go and have a nice long bath until he gets the idea.