AIBU about not trusting my 15 yr old to lock up at night?

[Gossipmonster]

DC 15, 13 bad 11. I am quite strict about bedtimes in term time - in the holidays I am much more relaxed.

However I am working full time and this week am not feeling great. I want to go to bed but my 15 yr old wants to stay up. I don't really trust him to turn everything off (lock any doors he unlocks) and go to bed at a reasonable hour (ie not play X-box until 2am) - he often leaves his bedroom light and lamp on all night despite me threatening to remove the bulb!

I have said I want him to go to bed (he has no TV up there atm) but don't mind if he reads/goes on his laptop for a bit.

AIBU? Is there a compromise?

What do other people do?!

Has he finished school yet? If yes, let him have the responsibility of turning lights etc off. You go and lock the door and windows.
It won't kill him.

I'd do him a list of what you expect him to do before going to bed and let him do it one night, on the understanding that if he misses anything you won't trust him to do it again and he'll have to go to bed in future when you do.

You lock the doors and make the property secure. If he leaves on a light or two, he leaves on a light or two. read the riot act about turning off the electrical stuff.

Yes he's finished - he can't turn his own lights in his room off though despite me bemoaning him Every. Bloody. Morning.

My god at 15 he should be more than capable of locking the doors and windows and switching everything off..

FFS..

Not sure.

At 15 I'd been allowed to stay at home without parents for years and mind my significantly younger sibling during the day.

That same younger sibling at 17 can't be trusted to take his key out of the door after locking it.

Give it a go and if he can't manage it,tell him he can't do it anymore.

You have a 15 yr old boy do you wtff? .

He is extremely absent minded and I worry about my electricity bill rocketing any more than it will already with the kids off.

I agree, you lock up, tell him not to touch the doors and windows then go to bed. I do agree with you about not wanting him to lock up per se, but if you do it and make sure he knows not to unlock anything after you've done it he should be fine.

Hmm maybe I'll give him a chance and if he lets me down that's that.

Don't do it !! Unless they are sensible.
Twice in 6 days large downstairs bay window has been left wide open .We live on a busy main road!
I locked up ,shut all windows and left them to watch the TV -DS 17 & 14-,but it was so hot they opened one up again.
Last time was this morning ,I said if it happens again ,no laptop or x box for whole day.

Seriously OP - give him a chance. If he lets you down then he can't have that responsibility and so must got to bed as and when the rest of family do.

He'll soon be trying his best!

At 15 years old I went to school, had 3 part time jobs after school and weekends and had my own set of keys to our house to get in and out, shock horror I even cooked for myself now and again and could use the washing machine.

A 15 year old should most definitely be able to lock a couple door and windows and turn stuff off...

*doors

15 year olds should be more than capable of turning things off and making sure doors/windows are locked...

I woke up in the night to Blackpool illuminations in our house - DS (12) had gone to bed leaving all the lights on everywhere. We had gone early due to DD's "sleep"over party the night before

He's 15, and not trusted to lock up?? Unbelievable.... What does he do by himself?

Am actually amazed by this,and yes have teenage son

I forget to shut windows and lock doors, I'm certain DD1 would be at least as reliable.

DD2(12) I might think twice about.

Write him a post it or ten and stick them where they can't be missed.

Why does he need to unlock doors?

Make sure the door is locked before you go to bed. I probably wouldn't worry about the lights being left on for one night if he forgets and if he hasn't got school in the morning does it really matter if he stays up late. But perhaps you could give him a checklist of things to do before he goes to bed. Do you think you might wake up in the night at all? maybe you could just go and check everything then.

The sooner they are given the responsibility of this sort of thing, the quicker it will become second nature, just keep at him. He probably won't magically become responsible later on if he's never been expected to do things like this.

I would have been trusted with this at 15 and I really was a cloudcuckoolander. The house probably could have burned down around me if I was engrossed enough in something.

Here's a thought to the for fuck sakers some 15 year olds are different to other 15 year olds.

I could conduct a light opera and perform surgery at 15 but my son cannot.

Dadthelion

We're not talking about light opera or surgery.

We're talking about turning a key in a few locks and flicking a few switches off. Any normal 15 year old can do that FFS.

That has to be the weakest comparison i've seen on mumsnet yet.. here's a

Not sure whether I'd let my 15yo lock up or not. I'd trust the 13 yo, and the 12 yo, but tbh I'd probably find that the 15yo had vanished out the door as soon as I started snoring. He would have locked the door though