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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

What do you want me to do?

56 replies

missmash · 23/07/2013 22:20

I'm in bed reading, DC both asleep, my work is done. DH just came in and said It's supposed to rain tonight what do you want me to do about the washing on the line? FFS I can't believe it but I got out of bed, got dressed and brought the sodding washing in. I'm now back in bed seething, why does he have to be so hopeless?

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 23/07/2013 22:51

See my DH would have received 'that look' and the reply...

"I'd like you to gather it together, marinade it and stick it in the oven on gas mark 5, turning once every hour throughout the night...then serve with lightly spiced potato wedges and a side salad."

Or you could just take it in you cunt clump....

charlottehere · 23/07/2013 22:53

Oh *** dh do fuck off

Original poster
missmash · 23/07/2013 22:54

He kind of flapped about saying he would have done it. Why ask then? Why? Argh!

OP posts:
kim147 · 23/07/2013 22:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AlbertoFrog · 23/07/2013 22:59

Because he reckoned if he played the clueless husband you'd do it yourself and save him a job?

I hear where you're coming from OP. Like me you just want your other half to do something without having to ask or be told. I used to think my DH was totally lacking in common sense but am now wondering if he's cleverer than he makes out and I'm the stupid one.

NoelHeadbands · 23/07/2013 23:02

So he knew

A) it was forecasted to rain

And

B) the washing was out.

He didn't join the two up by himself, he needed guidance?

Original poster
missmash · 23/07/2013 23:03

Hmm you're right Kim, he does ask questions about the simplest things, no idea why he wouldn't feel empowered to do these things though.

He does have a tendency to say, you do it, you're better at (xyz) than me.
Did I marry a manchild?!

OP posts:
WafflyVersatile · 23/07/2013 23:04

Maybe he asked because he thought if he brought it in that would be wrong like the other times he's done stuff off his own bat!

kim147 · 23/07/2013 23:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Doingakatereddy · 23/07/2013 23:07

You did what?! You got out of bed?

FFS Woman, I don't know who's worse. You may have married a manchild, but he married a martyr Smile

ouryve · 23/07/2013 23:08

The correct answer was "I would like you to bring it in and fold it, please."

GhoulWithADragonTattoo · 23/07/2013 23:09

Are you a perfectionist OP? My mum always used to complain that my dad wouldn't take the initiative with housework etc. The truth was he was too scared to because it would never be good enough for my mum. Better to get step by step instructions than take the initiative.

kim147 · 23/07/2013 23:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
missmash · 23/07/2013 23:11

I just ignore it Kim and then do it myself which totally proves Doings point!!

OP posts:
kim147 · 23/07/2013 23:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

littlemisswise · 23/07/2013 23:13

We arrived back from holiday this afternoon. So far I have done 3 loads of washing, and there is one on the floor in front of the machine to go in when the beach towels finished. DH has just this minute come up to bed and said "the washing machine has finished, what do you want me to do with it?"

I asked him if I had asked him the same question every other time it has finished today, so now he is in a sulky mood!Hmm

Original poster
missmash · 23/07/2013 23:13

Not a perfectionist Ghoul otherwise said washing wouldn't still be on the line at 10pm but I can see your point.Wink

OP posts:
MelanieCheeks · 23/07/2013 23:18

Like cos, is the weather forecast is NEVER wrong, is it!

OrangeLily · 23/07/2013 23:24

My DH would have asked this but that's because it's my 'job' and he knows generally to leave it well alone.

However if I was tucked up in bed , I would have just told him to sort it?

Bringmewineandcake · 24/07/2013 00:35

Mine will bring in the washing (after asking first if I want "my washing" bringing in...) and will then dump it unceremoniously on the very first bit of the kitchen table he reaches on walking back into the house.
Cheers hon...

mayorquimby · 24/07/2013 00:55

"Not another one - Dear Lord I am so sick of reading about these incompetent men (allowed to be so by their OHs)."

Is it even that hapless? If one of a couple has left something out to dry and the other noticed it was still out despite forecasted rain I'd have thought they'd still ask just to check if the other knew that it was supposed to rain and had decided to chance leaving it out or whether they'd just forgot etc.

amistillsexy · 24/07/2013 01:06

I hung a load of washing out at tea time, then it started to rain. DH and I just looked at each other, then each decided the rain would do it good, so we'd leave it.

Ten minutes later, Ds1 came in the front door looking like a drowned rat. He'd been playing out when the rain started, saw the washing and brought it in...only the back door was locked, so he posted it piece by piece through the cat flap Grin

He'll make someone a lovely husband one day!

YoniBottsBumgina · 24/07/2013 01:11

Definitely reframe it and ask what he thinks! You'll never offload the thinking work if you keep doing the thinking for him, either by saying "Yes can you bring it in please/No leave it I like the smell of rain on my undies!" or doing it for him.

Introduce him to the startling notion that he can actually work out domestic dilemmas for himself and one day you may find that he no longer asks and just makes the decision...

Monty27 · 24/07/2013 01:41

More fool you.

He asked you what you would like him to do, you answered by doing it yourself. Confused

libertine73 · 24/07/2013 01:50

bless him, he would have done it I'm sure, I sometimes leave the washing out if ts wet, even if I think it might rain.

he was just checking, and you got out of bed, did it, then seethed about it, weird.