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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

The great british menu - food poverty... AIBU?

993 replies

Bogeyface · 11/07/2013 20:25

I hate myself for thinking this but, AIBU to think that Lady Whatsername who said in the 90's that the reason poor people couldnt manage on benefits was because they lacked the ability to cook good simple nutritious meals, may have had a point? The way she said it was totally U and she was very sneery, but I cant help thinking that there might be a grain of truth in it.

Of the three families I have just seen in this program I saw what 2 of them ate in a day. one was a mother and daughter who's only meal of the day was a microwave burger each costing £1 each, and the other was a family where the children had fish fingers or nuggets and oven chips, while the parents had tinned veg.

£14 per week that the first family spent is enough for a bag of baking potatoes, some basics pasta, baked beans, passatta, a pack of frozen sausages, a bag of porridge oats, some cheese, some sandwich meat such as Haslet from the deli counter (35p per 100g in my tesco) and milk. The DD would be getting free school meals if I heard correctly about her age and their income. Far healthier, more filling and more than one meal a day!

The second family, again, for the price of nuggets, fish fingers and oven chips they could make a spag bol using basics ingredients that would feed them all well.

RAther than focussing on the cost of food, which is only going to rise, surely it would be better to focus on educating people who eat badly because the food they choose is more expensive than cheaper, healthier alternatives that require a bit of cooking knowledge?

OP posts:
ApocalypseThen · 14/07/2013 17:14

Ah, the undeserving poor wasting their one shot with the type of compassion that gives a beggar 20p on the strict instruction that they don't spend it on drugs.

nkf · 14/07/2013 17:18

No, it is not okay that British families have only the price of 1 bottle of cheap wine to feed a person for a week.

A very MN way of looking at things.

nkf · 14/07/2013 17:21

But how the money is used is relevant. If you are motivated to give out of compassion for children, you don't want the money spent on fags and booze. (I am assuming the story is true.)

You are perfectly entitled to decide to give or not based on how you think the money will be spent.

That's why some people prefer organised charities to handing over the cash in the street.

ApocalypseThen · 14/07/2013 17:24

Yeah, but once you've decided to give someone cash it's theirs and you've no say in how they spend it. Assuming you have is very controlling, and then deciding that you've no sympathy or charitable instinct left based on what you consider to be the bad behaviour of someone you freely chose to give money to is paternalistic, controlling nonsense.

IfNotNowThenWhen · 14/07/2013 17:25

Do thank your step dad for the Smirnoff from me.

pollywollydoodle · 14/07/2013 17:42

i just wanted to say that this thread has been a real eye opener for me. i've worked with the homeless and was used to their hand to mouth existence but i wasn't aware how much families who have somewhere to live are affected.
i live on the edge of a town within walking distance of 3 supermarkets ...they seem to be everywhere round here and i wouldn't have known that some people don't have one nearby.

i'm ashamed to say i hadn't thought about the price of fuel per se but esp from key meters

and i want to cry at the sheer injustice of it. we have to be careful with spending but this is a different league Sad

garlicsmutty · 14/07/2013 17:45

paternalistic, controlling nonsense - Yep, and I'm glad you said it properly before I went into rant mode!

nfk - that's why I said it :)

pollywollydoodle · 14/07/2013 17:47

oops, sent too soon.
i was thinking about the option of community kitchens where people could buy small amounts of food at bulk prices...cook them/be taught how to do it...maybe even have lockable freezer units
just an idea...prepared to be shot down as i know i haven't thought it through.

marriedinwhiteagain · 14/07/2013 17:48

Do you know something, I don't give beggars 20p, I give them a hot drink or a sandwich so they can't spend my money on drugs, fags or booze.

And yes it was a true story - Sainsbury's at westwood ifnotnowthenwhen glad you appreciated your treats if it was you; shame about your child, again if it was you.

Some people have no idea about goodness or kindness or giving. I don't think my step father's psyche begins to understand how a human can buy fags and booze at the expense of a toddler - probably because he is a decent man and decent people don't behave like that.

JohFlow · 14/07/2013 18:05

I found the programme very difficult to view - I found found myself getting 'down' just watching. £14 per week is a massive challenge regardless of whether you have skills or not. I am on a restricted budget so cook everything for the family from scratch - weekly shop is about trying to make the most nutritious out of what we can afford. It's a labour of love! It pulls on my heartstrings when anyone has to struggle to keep themselves or their loved ones fed. Some of the people on that programme learn new ways to do and some were no better off when the chefs left. Questions were also left unanswered about the pit that some people can get into when poverty affects motivation -it's about a change in outlook not just about finances.

Bogeyface · 14/07/2013 19:04

"No, it is not okay that British families have only the price of 1 bottle of cheap wine to feed a person for a week."

A very MN way of looking at things.

£7 is not cheap wine! Which rather highlights the difference between viewpoints on what is cheap and whats not. I have a wonderful friend who has no fecking idea what it is like to be poor, she actually said to me "I suppose you will have to buy free range chicken instead of organic now wont you?" Luckily I know her well enough to laugh my head off and call her a dopey cow! She is now better (after going food shopping with me a couple of times) but is still in cloud cuckoo land.....

OP posts:
expatinscotland · 14/07/2013 19:11

I don't give beggars money because many have been trafficked into this country by organised crime.

ICBINEG · 14/07/2013 19:30

okay I know people thought the show was patronising but I found it moving and educational about the real straights people are finding themselves.

marriedinwhiteagain · 14/07/2013 19:51

My dc are teenagers and even if I went without food myself for a week I don't think I coukd satisfy one of their appetites on 14 pounds. Well I could but they would be pretty miserable. Me and a four year old I suppose at a push I could do it on cheap pastan tinned toms, potatoes, cheddar cheese and ham scraps, bread and cheap cereal - fruit???? But I wouldn't want to do it.

IfNotNowThenWhen · 14/07/2013 20:22

It wasn't really me, you donut!

TheSilveryPussycat · 14/07/2013 20:43

Hav e any of you had a look at or even tried a mid-range ready meal? They seem to be of good quality with minimum rubbish in - or am I naive? Certainly the taste is in some cases as good as my own cooking - and I am quite a good cook.

With so many working, both partners, when do people have the time, fuel etc. If we want to continue having both partners working in a nuclear family, maybe we can only afford this by bulk cooking and mass distribution?

MimsyBorogroves · 14/07/2013 21:22

Re. sanitary protection in food bank donations - would giving (new, boxed obviously) mooncups be welcome? Just thinking that it's a reusable form that can be purchased for the same price as a few boxes of tampons and will obviously last longer - but a lot of people have a negative view of them.

expatinscotland · 14/07/2013 21:26

'Re. sanitary protection in food bank donations - would giving (new, boxed obviously) mooncups be welcome?'

I wouldn't. I love mine, but it's a form of sanpro you need to really want to use.

garlicsmutty · 14/07/2013 21:34

TheSilveryPussycat, I agree with you about mid-range ready meals, but fail to see how they fit into a thread about eating on £7 a week.

florencebabyjo · 14/07/2013 22:29

I am not denying things are hard for many, but it may help to avoid meat products which are invariably more expensive, and go for vege options instead. Small amounts of fresh veg, yellow sticker types are great can add goodness and flavour to carbs like pasta and potatoes with a bit of cheese. As a student with no money and small DS I bought a jumbo pack of assorted veg seeds in the pound shop and grew a load of my own veggies for free. Charity shops are great for finding kitchen equipment at pennies each piece and of course buy basic own brand stuff like tomatoes and beans all add bulk, protein and flavour.

expatinscotland · 14/07/2013 22:36

'As a student with no money and small DS I bought a jumbo pack of assorted veg seeds in the pound shop and grew a load of my own veggies for free.'

Because we all have gardens, outdoor space and allotments.

AudrinaAdare · 14/07/2013 22:37

"donut" Grin

I can see that a Mooncup is a great way of saving money but it is personal. And san-pro will also be needed by pre-teens.

Typing that, thinking of children going without these things makes me wonder how our leaders sleep at night, it really does.

florencebabyjo · 14/07/2013 22:40

No expatinscotland!
I had neither of those or any time as a single mum struggling to complete a degree. I was in a 3rd floor flat and grew them in old marj tubs on the bathroom floor. Sometimes it just takes a bit of thinking outside the box and a non defeatist attitude :)

AudrinaAdare · 14/07/2013 22:41

expat don't forget the free water. Wish mine was! No paddling pool for the DC this year.

florencebabyjo · 14/07/2013 22:43

Could use old dishwater for watering! As good as free then