To think I have had best (or worst) bad baby advice, ever?

[ANormalOne]

I'm having trouble with my 5 month DD waking herself up tossing and turning at night. My DF's brilliant advice was to get some baby reins, wrap them around her mattress and then clip her into them to stop her wriggling around.

I can't see how that could possible go wrong I'm amazed I made to adulthood.

Drawers are completely fine! In Finland they send you a shoebox to keep the baby in

I am soooo upset I've only found out about the roaming circle! Do you think DS8 would still be up for it?

I was told by the midwife on the post natal ward to bf DS1 at 4 hour intervals only. I was brain empty by that point and he cried all night.

Still feel as though I failed him, even now.

Betsy
What year was that?

2006. There was one midwife on the ward for about 30 women. He was crying, I was sobbing.

In the end, I heard another woman get up from the bed opposite and go and fetch the midwife. I could hear her saying 'That woman opposite keeps crying, I think you need to help her a bit more.' So eventually, the midwife told me I could just feed him. He went to sleep, I did too.

I'll always be grateful to that woman opposite. And I feel bad because she was kept up by me all night!

:) this sounds like the sort of advice my dad would give, Im never sure if he's joking or not.

With DS I was told not to pick him up unless necessary "feed him then back in his basket, change him then back in his basket, soothe him then back in his basket" as I didn't want a clingy baby and it would mean I'd be free to have the housework done and dinner cooking for DH getting in from work ...

I used to give DD loads of cuddles when she was a baby, she was never clingly, and 6, she still loves cuddles, win win.

Some of this advice is just nuts.

Betsy - I am so sorry and I know how you feel. When ds1 was born (2003) I had an epidural, it was pretty heavy duty and I couldn't get up the next day. He was in a cot, crying, and I was also having a bad reaction to the drugs and kept being sick, I couldn't stop though there was nothing in me to come up.

The assistants (not nurses) kept saying 'we'll get you some tea' which didn't help, no one would find a doctor, and no one came to pick him up.

In fact it was the Bounty lady who eventually said, very loudly, 'will someone please HELP this poor woman?'!

But by then ds had gone to sleep unfed (he had fed at birth) and then they came round and threatened to give him a bottle if he didn't feed by bedtime

I was told he couldn't come in my bed (health and safety) but I ignored them and he did feed again in the end and they just gave up telling me what to do, because I was so bloody angry and refused to take any notice. And I ended up feeding him till he was 16 months. I'd never have managed it if I hadn't been primed by my mum, that I'd breastfeed.

I have no idea how people with no family support ever manage it.

Betsy - I had similar (2007). I knew different, but somehow my noodled brain just accepted the advice and DS went hours without being fed :(
On day 3 I sort of woke up and realised that he was hungry! Ffs.. bloody MW made those first few days horrific. Poor little thing :(

11 month old DS had a nasty case of croup.

I shit you not, I was told by a family member to put hot (!) whiskey (!) with honey (!) in his beaker for him to drink and to then give him a crushed up paracetamol (!) in milk...

When I had dd 3 years ago, we had to stay in for quite a few days as I had pre eclampsia.

I was really struggling with bf and decided to try a bit of skin to skin to see if that would help.

A few minutes later I was called to take her to be weighed etc, the midwife told me off that she wasn't dressed "don't I realise its February!". I explained about the skin to skin and she said "why?" I told her that I was having trouble getting her to latch on.

She replied "fine, but she really should be dressed!"

Really! I don't think a baby has every got cold on a baking post natal ward!

I constantly get told to give DS booze. We suffered pretty badly with sleep regression at around 4 months.

DGF told me that when my DM was little he used to unscrew the back of the dummy, fill it with wine/brandy/whiskey and give it to DM 'to help her sleep'. He couldn't understand why I wouldn't do the same.

I also get told off for giving DS boring food - like vegetables.

She still likes a tipple, my mum

Oh yes, boring old vegetables :)

I wouldn't let 4mo DS have any food at a Chinese buffet place while 5mo DN was being given curry, rice, crackers and all sorts. I got told that I'd turn DS into a fussy eater if I gave him too much healthy stuff and that he'll never develop an appetite if I don't allow him to eat he's now three and a bottomless pit

BigW you have reminded me of my DM's 'advice'. First port of call is ALWAYS cooled boiled water off a spoon. Cures everything, apparently. And for the things it doesn't cure, go to step 2: booze. Yeah, think I'll just stick with the breast milk ma!

Wilson are we related?! I get that one too!

I was chatting to another mum at the school gates once and mentioned how ds wouldn't settle in his cot. She advised me to do the baby reins in the cot thing and said it worked a treat with hers (don't worry I ignored advice!).

When my DS1 had a fever at 11 months and I was sponging him down my MIL walked in and asked what did I think I was doing and to wrap him up in a blanket so he could sweat the fever out. No wonder my DH often had convulsions when he was ill as a child.

My mother had a friend who used the side of an old cot, attached with hinges as a lid to the current cot, to stop her twins from getting out.
It was widely considered ingenious and practical apparently.

Well the official advice is not to sponge children down, actually, as that can cause their fever to spike, causing, erm, convulsions.

But wrapping them up to sweat it out isn't really going to work either!

Bunty, what you are describing sounds like a cage

Yes, I know, it was a cage. She was a nurse, so I guess she got the idea at work

Actually, a baby cage sounds quite good! Dragon's Den anyone? I could couple it with DGF's screw top dummy and we're good to go. I'll even throw in a miniture jonnie walker for the first 10 orders.

Now I just need to think of a name...