Just once in a while I'd like someone else to...

[csmm]

Do the washing up after I've cooked. Oh, and maybe cook.

I would like someone else to pair up the socks. And put them in the correct drawers for the correct owner.

Oh you are living in a fantasy world!! None of mine would lift a finger for me

I've had hyperemesis this pregnancy. It's under control now but MIL is STILL bringing round dinner every night. Yes, I am the luckiest DIL in Britain.

Haven't you got anyone? Start them young.

DP refuses to learn to cook, as he says there's no point 'when, OP, you do it so well'

Am teaching DS to cook as we go along, but he's only 7, so will be a while I think. And he's the slowest in the world at anything, so washing up would take a fortnight

Marzipanned - you're so lucky!

Try this, "DH, since I cook so well, could you wash up after?".

You need a "I cooked, you clean up rule". I never do both.

god, if there was no chance of my DH ever cooking and washing up for me I'd go out and leave him a note 'I wanted someone else to cook and wash up. So I sold your X box and I'm off to Pizza Express. See ya'

It is quite simple- if your DP doesn't,and won't, cook he washes up afterwards. I never understand why people don't start as they mean to go on. Start from today - don't ask- tell him that as you cook he will be washing up.

If he refuses then stop cooking for him- tell him the house fairy doesn't exist.

Problem is he says he'll get round to it when I ask him. Then will do a bit and give up when he gets bored. I can't stand to leave dishes/pots in piles by the sink I'm a bit OCD that way

Generally I don't mind too much, just once in a while would be nice stares at dirty stock pot from last night

Pancake not a huge fan generally of sorting washing - did train DS to put his own clothes away early!

csmm I know! It's got to stop soon as I really am fine now.

DH has the same line about me being too good a cook for him to bother learning, which I actually think is fair enough - just like he's too good at various household tasks for me to bother learning!

He would never offer to wash up but he always would do it if I asked. Maybe you just need to insist!

One cooks, one cleans - it's the only way!

Or one does all one day then the other does it all the next.

We run it like that sometimes as DH uses every blooming pot, pan and utensil in the house to make egg and chips that he needs to learn!

At least my DP has the excuse he works away a lot and the children and I would be incredibly hungry waiting for food.

DS1 is in training for his pants/vest/socks putting away.

DS2 would rather go naked at the moment and doesn't see the point of clothing.

I second those who say one cooks - one does the washing up. Simple and fair.

YABU

You need to insist a bit more I'm afraid!

DH does the cooking in our house (he really is better at it) so I do the cleaning up after.

I don't mind cooking but I would love it if someone told me what to cook every night. Trying to please everyone and getting thanks of no one does give me the rage nightly.

Good lord some of you get walked over.

Seriously towerofjelly you try to cook to please everyone rather than just what's easy and healthy? And then they don't thank you?

I cook whatever I damn well feel like cooking. And if either DH or DS don't say 'thank you' they'll be wearing tonight's dinner.

csmm sounds like you're admitting you have a set way you'd like him to do it - e.g. you'd like him not to leave pots to soak... That's part of the problem. If DH says 'I'll wash up becstar' then I say 'thanks' and then I don't touch the washing up from that meal. If he hadn't done a pot, it would still be there months later - he's said he's doing it so I'd let him do it in his own time without nagging. You can't expect someone to help you but for them to do it your way.

My Dad used to say to my mum that you don't have a dog and bark yourself! My DH says to me a SATM that he doesn't make me go to work so I do it all.

And your mum used to let him say it?
I would say that as a SAHM you have been working all day, the evening is the part where you are both not working and take turns- not where he stops and you carry on. That or get a job and make him do half of everything.

becs I'm the one who soaked it - he'd just have left it sitting.

Mostly I don't mind. Just once in a while would be nice though.

I agree that you have to let them do it their own way. Why bother soaking it if he is doing it? His problem and not yours.