To be upset that someone on fb has just put ' like' on my post that my mum is about to die..?

[Scarletohello]

My mum has been in a care home for 4 years,after suffering a severe stroke thatleft her pararlysed, unable to speak or swallow food. It's been an incredibly stressful and distressing time, compounded by the fact that my dad has dementia and is going blind. I got a call from the care home yesterday to say the it looked like she was nearing the end of her life. I have been in to see her the last 2 days and she is v pale, frail and all her organs are shutting down I posted on fb tonight about the fact that she was nearing the end of her life and have had some incredilbly kind and supportive replies. But one so called friend just ticked 'like' and didn't write anything WTAF?? Why would some one 'like' that your mum is dying??? Stupid new age freak! I'm so pissed off, I don't need this now ( just needed to vent, sorry..)

I'm very sorry about your mum.

I don't normally use facebook at all other than to share/look at photos, but I do get why you'd share this - my friend did the same just last week with sad news.

It makes sense - have the same awful coversation with 20-odd people is the last thing you need. It's easier to put it on something like Facebook I think, then your friends know and can help you through it. I hope you can take some strenght & comfort from your friends.

I have also 'liked' a lot of facebook posts while completely unaware that I'd done so. I'd be mortified to have done so in a situation like yours, and really hope that I haven't!

Very sorry for what you're going through.

Im gonna be flamed for this one but here goes ! I never understand why anyone would put such private stuff like this facebook anyway?? Im really sorry to hear abouit your mum and I hope you are ok.

I do understand why people put such things on Facebook.

During immense stress different people react/act in different ways. Same with grief.

One person putting something on FB and one person keeping it to themselves or just discussing with people who are in the room with them, it makes no difference. It is what it means to the person experiencing those feelings and not the people reading.

I would be the person putting it on FB. I would feel like I was 'with' those that replied, even if they were miles away. It would make me feel better.

I never understand why people don't filter their comments when posting on a thread with an obviously sad OP. Bit of a dick move to be incredibly insensitive and then tack on "I hope you are okay" at the end.

I can't actually believe some of the comments on here! The title of this thread wasn't 'is it appropriate to use Facebook for personal situations'.

People's opinions on FB is really irrelevant given the nature of what the OP is currently going through. She clearly came on here for some support & had already explained her reasons for putting the post on Facebook.

God forbid any of you who are being so cruel & judgemental ever find yourself in a situation like hers and are just seeking a few words of comfort and instead find yourself being ripped to shreds & slated.

I am sure that they mean 'like' in a completely different way than from normal conversation.

I had to come on to add that I have often liked the most inappropriate things by accident with clumsy thumbs on my phone. I bet it was a mistake. It's very easily done. Really sorry about your mum. Very best to you

In the Op's state of mind, surely Facebook is the best way to let everybody know the latest news about her mum without the ghastly job of phoning everybody when she is devastated herself?
It's a social network site, where sometimes people do have to impart bad news.
Like is, as others have said, an acknowledgement and without writing out a message is the only alternative Op, I'm sure your friend meant she was thinking of you.

Sorry about your mum.I'm sure your friend was trying to show her support.

Writing 'I'm going to get flamed for this' doesn't stop your post making you sound like a dick.

Writing 'I'm going to get flamed for this' doesn't stop your post making you sound like a dick.

^This.

OP, am sorry you are going through such a shit time. Agree with others, it was either an accidental 'like' through thumb/finger slipping on phone screen OR the person wasn't sure what to say so just wanted to let you know they are thinking of you.

I hope you are ok x

I would do similar by way showing some support or acknowledgement. Please don't let this get to you at such a difficult time and maybe consider not posting further updates on Facebook.

That's awful. The like button can mean 'I hear you', 'I agree' or 'I have read that'. It's a bit insensitive though. I have pressed like on news articles that aren't good because I'm thanking the person for posting it. Sorry that you are about to lose your mum. x

OP - you're not unreasonable to get upset as you are clearly going through a horrible time and I'm so sorry to hear about your mum.

I do agree with those saying that the 'ilke' could have been accidental, or meant as a gesture of support in some way, so please give your friend the benefit of the doubt. If they are in any way a decent person, I'm sure they meant it well.

Those of you who have been insensitive enough to criticise the OP for posting on FB at all are definitely being unreasonable and far, far worse than the friend who clicked 'like'. There are some very, very rude and insensitive posters on this thread.

ps, I remember my male cousin posted a clip of an Italian newsreader accidently spilling out of her bra which burst out of her shirt on live tv. A few men liked it, and me. I was mortified. I hadn't realised. I was on my phone scrolling up and down.

Its not being insensitive judithofthepiece it is simply being honest. Sure this isnt a thread about the merits of fb but its a simple fact the very nature of fb is that it is quite puerile and childish. As such, the OP has learnt a very harsh lesson in posting something very serious in such a forum. Moreover, if i was very ill i would absolutely hate the idea of somebody broadcasting the fact across bloody fb.

The OP doesn't need such insensitive 'honesty' at a time like this.

Hope you are ok OP it must be a very difficult time for you

Bloody Hell ageofgrandillusion, not insensitive??
Just being honest??
I have no words, as the only ones I can think of would be deleted.

Facebook is just another way for people to communicate with their friends and family. With privacy settings it is not a public forum and there is nothing wrong with what the OP did. I agree it is a better way of communicating than having to phone lots of people in tears. Hope you are ok OP

Sorry about your Mum, OP.

I think it may have been liked accidentally. This person, if they are your friend, clearly doesn't "like" that fact that your mother is at death's door. Please don't fall out with someone over something like this, at a time like this.