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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think you can't judge a child by their name??

412 replies

SaveWaterDrinkMalibu · 04/07/2013 21:45

Would you judge a child by their first name?

Katie Hopkins on this morning was saying how she judged the children her children play with by their names.

There's a YouTube video but can't link it

OP posts:
YoniSingWhenYoureWinning · 05/07/2013 21:30

My point here is that I would suspect that somebody who would name a child Peachez is probably a bit silly. And I would want to ascertain that they could be trusted to look after my child. That's all.It's not about judging a Liam or a Tyler, it's about people who would give their child a name so silly that I would question their values and common sense.

ThisReallyIsNotSPNopeNotAtAll · 05/07/2013 21:35

I just don't care about what people call their children. I dont judge people on what names they decide or think that 'Peachez' mum needs sussing out more then Sarah.

girliefriend · 05/07/2013 21:35

I saw this woman on this morning and thought Holly Willoboobie did well not to slap her tbh, she looked a lot like she wanted to Grin

I think my dds name is fine but I would have a massive problem with my dd playing with this womans children as I wouldn't want her anywhere near such a malignant and pernicious person Angry

My dds best friend has a name that some horrible people would be snobby about and it breaks my heart tbh that the poor girl could be judged before even uttering a word Sad

dementedma · 05/07/2013 21:37

Can't believe she would check out a Simon. I think Simon is a lovely name and I have yet to meet one in the flesh!

badtime · 05/07/2013 21:40

The problem with judging children's names is that the person judging can often get it wrong. I have seen criticism on MN of names like Mercedes or Levi, or spellings like Aleksandr or Ysabel, all of which are traditional names in certain cultures/countries. Another good one is Chantal, a lovely French name (which, I concede, English people mangle).

So people may judge wrongly, even on their own terms, if they think it is okay to judge.

Liara · 05/07/2013 21:45

The problem with being a name snob is that is shows you up as being incredibly provincial restricted in your world view.

There are millions of reasons why people choose a name that are specific to their family, history, and possibly future plans in life (some names/spellings are very challenging in other languages, something that may seem like a misspelling in English may be massively more manageable in other languages).

Having been born in a country where you had to choose names from an officially approved list, and as a result about 1 in 3 women had the equivalent of Mary for a first name, I rather enjoy meeting people with more unusual names.

I do find that when I meet yet another 'insert most popular name of the year' I wonder how a parent could do that to their child, but then I guess statistically speaking it's always going to exist.

DancingLady · 05/07/2013 21:46

My sister's son has a name that another sister said was 'quite black' Confused while my DD has an old-fashioned Polish name (I'm Polish) that hasn't even been popular over there for many a decade Smile. It suits her perfectly, and I've yet to meet another child (or another woman under 80) with it.

I wouldn't judge a child on their name, only on their behaviour. DD can play with whoever she wants to - I'd be incredibly sad if she grew up to be a snob or a racist, judging people on such random stuff.

YoniSingWhenYoureWinning · 05/07/2013 21:46

" I dont judge people on what names they decide"

But you do. We all do. You draw conclusions about somebody named Tequila-Storm, of course you do.

DancingLady · 05/07/2013 21:50

badtime and liara - exactly. Foreign names are really common where I live (in a non-posh bit of south London), as parents are often first- or second-generation immigrants. I think it's beautiful that they're giving their child something of a country they won't grow up in, to carry with them every day. (OK it's a Friday night and I'm a leetle drunk.)

Also, sorry, but I get SO BORED of all the top-10, top-20 names too... people, do you really want half your DCs class to have the same name? I'd rather a Savannah or a Kyle than another Amelie or Thomas...

ThisReallyIsNotSPNopeNotAtAll · 05/07/2013 21:51

I honestly couldn't give a flying nun what someone decides to call their children. I have a huge family with some unusual names thrown in which people roll their eyes at or claim they are 'chavvy'

Why would I care what people call their own children? I judge on what people say and do not what they are called or decide to call their children.

As I said earlier, call your child sponge for all I care!

DancingLady · 05/07/2013 21:52

I've never met a kid with the name Tequila-Storm - have you? She could be the youngest sister of Bob Geldof's girls, and a millionaire, just as easily as she could be from an estate in Peckham. I might raise an eyebrow at her parents' decision, but I'd judge her on her behaviour.

itsonlysubterfuge · 05/07/2013 21:55

I was at the zoo yesterday and I swear I heard a little girl being called Gravity. I wonder how you would judge her by that name?

YoniSingWhenYoureWinning · 05/07/2013 21:56

I've met kids with names you wouldn't believe. They all have extremely silly parents. It's a lovely idea that somebody can be called Casino and that says nothing whatsoever about them as a person, but it certainly isn't my experience.

DancingLady · 05/07/2013 22:03

But it doesn't say anything about them as a person - it says a LOT about their parents, though.

YoniSingWhenYoureWinning · 05/07/2013 22:06

But unfortunately for little Casino and her(!) many similarly-named siblings, they are being raised with their parents values. People who would name a child after their preferred gambling venue.

catgirl1976 · 05/07/2013 22:10

I want a DD called Mecca Bingo :)

DancingLady · 05/07/2013 22:11

I think you're being classist about this - working-class values = bad, middle-class values = good. Since when is gambling a working-class vice? Little Hugo or Araminta might be being raised to think it's OK to cheat, lie or steal, while Casino et al might be the most polite, bright and kind child in the classroom.

ThisReallyIsNotSPNopeNotAtAll · 05/07/2013 22:12

This class shite I only ever see on MN

salome2001 · 05/07/2013 22:26

DS (reception age) has a child in his class called Tray-Kwon. He won't be going to Tray's place for any playdates. Not because of his name, but because he has a habit of scratching my son with a sharpened pencil until he bleeds, and asked me once if DS could come to his house to "watch Alien versus Predator".

What is interesting in this discussion is how no one seem to be raising the issue of judging on the ethnicity of a child's name. DS' class has the above mentioned Tray-Kwon, Tyreece, Labibah, Usaim, Nuah, Bilal and Tenisha. Bet you all made a quick judgement on where their families came from.

usualsuspect · 05/07/2013 22:28

I've met kids with nice normal names who live in big fuck off posh houses who are the biggest stoners ever.

Zynnia · 05/07/2013 22:29

Is Liam considered chav in the Uk? that's irish for William Confused oh well. is Guillaume chav? or Guillermo?

dementedma · 05/07/2013 22:29

Joshua/josh isn't that common here in central Scotland as far as I know. "Bad" boys names would be Connor and the dreaded Calum

katydid02 · 05/07/2013 22:30

A while back I was chatting to a teacher who said that she'd never be able to call a child of hers XXXXX because she had seen so many children with that name who were a handful. Later that day I was talking to my DD who was complaing about a child in her class who was always causing trouble, jokingly I asked if he was called XXXXX, her reply was "How did you know?"

I think we all judge, whether consciously or otherwise.

Zynnia · 05/07/2013 22:31

So, all the bad boys in England have Irish names? I used to live in England. so glad now I didn't call my son Diarmuid. I was going to.

katydid02 · 05/07/2013 22:32

Itsonly, a child called Gravity would naturally be very down to earth of course, a real no nonsense type. You'd always know where you stand with a child called Gravity.