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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be really annoyed with nursery!!

28 replies

youaintallthat · 19/06/2013 13:37

I'm really mad at my ds nursery and need to have a moan about it. Ds is 18 m and doesn't really nap in the day time anymore. However when he was at nursery yesterday they let him nap for FOUR hours!! I wouldn't be so mad if it was an hour but 4 hours is ridiculous. I told nursery teacher I wasn't happy that they had let him sleep so long and that he doesn't really nap in the day time anymore as he outgrew that himself months ago. I understand if he was exhausted for some reason and needed a nap but he was only at nursery 6 hours and was aleep for most of it. Anyway last night he didn't get to sleep until 4.30 am and woke up again at 6 I'm off with him today and so far he hasn't slept...despite me trying to get him to have a short nap all morning. I know he will be tired gain tomorrow when he is back at nursery and they will prob just let him sleep all blooming day again.....grrrrrrrrrrrr

OP posts:
MildDrPepperAddiction · 19/06/2013 13:41

YANBU. A four hour nap is excessive. They should have woken him.

Make it clear when you leave him in tomorrow that he is not to nap more than x hours.

Hope he sleeps soon.

Nannyowl · 19/06/2013 13:45

Yes you are right to be annoyed, the nursery should respect your advice. And four hours silly.
Does he normally sleep well?
Make sure you ask them to wake him up tomorrow after x time.

Original poster
youaintallthat · 19/06/2013 13:46

Thanks he is being such a little pest today which is not him, he is having a tantrum every few mins but won't sleep!!

OP posts:
50shadesofmeh · 19/06/2013 13:47

God my toddler would be up all night if she slept that long tell them no more than an hour or it throws him off for days .

ukatlast · 19/06/2013 13:48

YABU Children should sleep on demand at that age...leastways I could never wake mine up when I tried...soon gave up on that one. I am no Queen of Routine though so feel free to ignore.

ll31 · 19/06/2013 13:49

I don't know, 18 months seems young to have stopped naps. Am generally of view that if he slept that long he needed it.

1Veryhungrycaterpillar · 19/06/2013 13:50

Four hours wow, you didn't stand a chance!

LittleprincessinGOLDrocks · 19/06/2013 13:50

Definitely have a discussion with Nursery tomorrow and say naps have to be limited to a maximum of an hour. Explain that he has had disturbed sleep due to them allowing an excessive length of nap.
And YANBU.

tripecity · 19/06/2013 13:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

RedHelenB · 19/06/2013 13:59

Instead of being mad with the nursery maybe think about did he need that sleep as it is unusual for an 18 month to go that long if he was well.

PearlyWhites · 19/06/2013 14:06

It is a long time to sleep however at 18 months he should still be having an afternoon nap.

1Veryhungrycaterpillar · 19/06/2013 14:06

RedHelena does have a good point

Original poster
youaintallthat · 19/06/2013 14:22

He isn't unwell and was his usual self yesterday...is very grumpy and tired today. I haven't ever stopped naps ds stopped them himself a while Ago. If he falls asleep in The day time I let him as he is obviously tired but I would never let him sleep 4 hours in day time as I know it would take about a week to get him to bed at decent hour again. I have a very hyperactive boy who used to kick me 200 plus times a day when pregnant so much so that I was always being monitored he was so hyper he never slept even when I was pregnant...he never really slept as new born and stopped naps himself about 4 months ago. He Goes to sleep about 10pm every night ( but in bed earlier) wakes up about 5.30 ... Then doesn't stop all day....I don't think he needed the 4 hours tbh as he was up all night and hasn't slept so far yet today...I'm probably a bit more annoyed as there are 2 nursery nurses in his room and one is pretty lazy.. She was the one in yesterday I'm sure she let him sleep for an easy day! The other nursery nurse is really nice and he has never slept that long for her...though I'm probably being a cow! When I told her I'd rather he didn't sleep for that long she just said she wouldn't wake him as she doesn't agree with it....

OP posts:
RedHelenB · 19/06/2013 14:32

And breathe! Seriously, if kids get overtired then they do fight sleep & it sounds to me as though it has all caught up with him in one big go! Daft as it sounds, babies do sleep better for having a nap at that age & I think the four hours sleep was the consequence of being too much on the go!

MammaTJ · 19/06/2013 14:38

she just said she wouldn't wake him as she doesn't agree with it

Well it wasn't her or those saying he should be allowed to sellp as long as he want who had to deal with him till 4.30 am was it?

Tell her, he who pays the piper calls the tune! A very apt saying in this case. You are paying for his care and would like it done so it enhances your home life with your DS, not ruins it.

MammaTJ · 19/06/2013 14:39

sellp = sleep.

Original poster
youaintallthat · 19/06/2013 14:41

Did I sound stressed...lol I wasn't meaning too....eeek sorry! My little rat bag has just fallen asleep so I can have my first brew of the day now...think I may have been a bit frazzled writing his post lol

OP posts:
grabaspoon · 19/06/2013 14:43

For a child who is so active - its odd that 1 he's dropped his nap at 18 months BUT even odder that he himelf kept himself asleep for 4 hours - he obviously needed it.

I am a nanny and I would wake after 2.5 hours but generally most children wake when they're ready - could he be going down with something - had he had a busy morning/day before

weirdthing · 19/06/2013 14:47

My DS1 has always been very active and stopped having naps at 18 months. My mother was surprised he lasted that long as I dropped my naps at 12 months. If he's ready to drop them, they shouldn't be messing with his routine. Very annoying! Sounds more like it's for their convenience.

xylem8 · 19/06/2013 14:50

you should reinstate his naps- he obviously had a lot of catching up to do.

katiecubs · 19/06/2013 14:54

He only sleeps 7.5 hours all day/night?! Cripes that really doesn't sound enough, have you ever taken him to the doctors about it?

IsThisAGoodIdea · 19/06/2013 14:56

Tripecity, they are not ridiculous comments at all.

18 months is very young to be able to manage happily without a nap. Note, I say "manage happily". Of course some will be able to stay awake all day and I'm sure it suits some parents to encourage that in order to guarantee an early night but most cannot function well without a sleep in the day.

As for the OP, three things:

  1. I would also have been a bit annoyed about the 4 hrs. I would immediately know that his sleep pattern would be messed up for days as a result.
  1. Do you know for sure that they didn't try to wake him? My DS would nap like he was in a coma at that age and it was very hard to wake him if he wanted to sleep.
  1. I would think hard about trying to get him to nap in the day. I could never just put DS in his cot and leave him to it. He always needed help to nod off in the day but I persevered because I knew he needed it.
Original poster
youaintallthat · 19/06/2013 15:09

Yeah he has seen paediatrician and gp. They just said he is a boy who doesn't need a lot of sleep...apparently it's not really uncommon he is otherwise really healthy, meeting all his milestones and no ADHD or anything like that he just doesn't sleep...I think my dh was the same as a baby according to mil she got prescribed some medicines to help him sleep as a child ........ I would never do that ........ But dh only has about 3-4 hours sleep a night now so hoping ds sticks to 7-8 a night I feel lazy for sleeping 8 hours a night!

OP posts:
HooverFairy · 19/06/2013 15:12

YANBU, they should have contacted you if it was very out of character, then it would have been your call.

CSIJanner · 19/06/2013 15:50

If he was ill a d needed it, then I would have agreed with nursery. But 4hrs when well? YANBU

My 16mo is dropping the afternoon nap - at the moment it's a bit hit and miss. But there's always a nap in the morning. As long as the nap is over before 3hours and never beyond 1600, I don't mind. But then my LO's are up before 0600, running riot.

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