DH and I both want to study to become a teachers at 42 and 45? Will be 47/51 by the time we've finished! Are we nuts?

[Lionessy]

I have always remembered my old dragon of an English teacher, who I thought hated me, telling me at my last lesson before I left school 'Lionessy, promise me you will go to university to study English, that is your talent'. The only compliment I can ever remember in an abusive and very lonely childhood .

Of course I did'nt. My self esteem has always been very low so I drifted from crap job to crap job, never enjoying them, always feeling like I was punching below my weight. I have spent 9 of the last 11 years of a SAHM (2 years in a short lived job local government role before DC4) prior to that I was a PA in banking in London where I was bored out of my skull!

After considering many new directions to have a last shot of a 'career', I've got it in my head to do an OU degree in English Language and Literature and then do a PCGE so I can use the degree to teach, preferably in a college or even use it to teach abroad.

I have mentioned this to DH and suggested he also does an OU degree in combined Maths and Physics which he always excelled at at school. English is not his mother tongue but I believe he can do it. He can then train to become a teacher as well which he would love (he is currently a lorry driver!). We could have weekends and school holidays free with the DC, the youngest of which is only 2 now and will be in the education system for the next 16 years and we will have another 15-20 years of working years left as well. Over the 4/5 years of training, DH will continue driving lorries and I will look for part time office work when DC4 starts nursery/school.

DH likes the idea but says I'm dreaming. It's not realistic and we are too old. We will also have student loans in excess of £30k. I am an eternal optimist though despite having much shit thrown at me throughout my life and really think this could a an achievement for both of us. AIBU and unrealistic?

I think the advice to do the degree and just enjoy that and later worry about whether you'll teach or not is very good. Also, staggering who is doing the degree makes sense as if you're working and have children then it is a huge extra thing to do, so maybe you could start yours first and then DH start in two years or something.

What Orange, Morgan et al have said... Don't be under any illusions that you will have weekends and holidays free - before or after you have qualified! Sorry to be negative but with 2DC (one toddler and one on the way) I couldn't even begin to imagine going through all the training, coursework, lesson planning etc with 4 children to care for. I'm incredibly lucky that my teaching role is consultative SEN work for a council so I'm not quite under the same stress levels as mainstream class teachers but I see enough of the stress and pressure teachers are under in all of the schools I visit to know I will not be returning to the classroom anytime soon.

I. Didn't realise you had 4 dc. I think it would be impossible to do a pace with 4

Pgce

I have an OU English exam tomorrow, and despite the headache from all the reading I'd say go for this degree. I'm loving it! DH has just finished his BEng (OU) and we found taking courses together, even in very different subjects helped us to set aside study time. If the DC went to bed early we would both get our books/computers out and side either side of the table. If there is only one person studying there might be pressure to sit and watch a film etc as study takes from your time together. If you both do it then you study together - it's still togetherness.

Have a look at the teaching options later. I wouldn't say no to the idea if you have passion and drive, in the same way I wouldn't say no to someone wanting to go into nursing in their 40s (I'm just leaving, tired of it all after 20 years).

And what about adult literacy or additional tutoring for children either pre-exam or for children who are struggling? Rather than a PGCE there are City& Guilds diplomas in teaching which might work for tutoring.

This thread is quite depressing but also quite eye opening.

Do the degree. The teaching part of it does sound nuts, sorry. I've just left English teaching (possibly temporarily) after 11 years and genuinely feel like I've got my life, marriage and children back. Passion for the subject is sadly not enough.

I think the degree is a good idea, but teaching?
You need to be continuously confident, able to deal with criticism from all and every angle whether justified or unjustified, you need to be mentally very robust and be able to compartmentalise so that you don't get overwhelmed by the relentless and continuous demands made on you.
How stable and assertive and non-paranoid do you feel?
The mental demands are at least as challenging as the physical and academic, and you have 4 children, the youngest is still very small.
What would you be risking to do this, and why? Is it really worth it?

I'm a 33yr old English teacher...I love the kids and the subject. I don't love the micro management, endless paperwork and unrealistic expectations. after a horrendous year for our dept (short staffed, serious issues etc) I am burnt out. I am starting maternity in two Weeks and cannot wait. I am having a year off then going part time. Were I to choose again I would choose something else...either a different subject or a total change!

I regret not using my brain at 18 and going to college. I still feel I may do a degree course in the next few years even though I am 46 now. But it's because I want to learn and use the intelligence I feel I wasted up to now, it's not about a career.

So I think you are totally right to go for the education opportunity now. But..........doing it for a job in teaching is risky. Are you sure you will love the job? Are you confident of getting a job? Will you feel the degree is wasted if you don't get the career you want out of it?

How much do you know about life as a teacher? Can you do some work experience in a school for a time to just shadow a teacher and see how you feel about the job?

And let your dh decide for himself in a year or so about whether to follow you into education. My dh has just finished a degree course, and it's been a big commitment for the family even though he started it when our dc were all in their late teens and didn't need much of his time. It was a very big deal for him having been out of the habit of studying for 20 years, and was very tough. Don't underestimate it.

So will you both work alongside your OU degree and your PGCE.I can't understand how you will finance this dream?

Just read your OP gain.Your DH is going to work fulltime alongside a fulltime degree course and 4 children to look after!! and at the end of it he'll be on a lower salary than he is now probably

This is going to sound really mean but I think you are also being way too assuming about how successful it'll be for you. A teacher training course is difficult to get onto especially for English and a lot of your reasons are about how convenient the working hours etc will be. I'm not sure how well that'd go down against people who are genuinely wanting to change pupils' lives. The other thing to consider is that English is a core subject - lots of pressure on results and also you'd potentially have to teach lots of pupils who really hate your subject but desperately need it for their future plans.

I'd really recommend doing some observations and getting some work experience. I know a lot of talented teaching assistants who have excellent degrees, lots of experience and great potential as teachers who can't get onto a course because of the huge competition.

I do hope it works out for you but I think you need a back-up plan and also just to take each step at a time. I did an OU degree and did a GTP alongside my final module and it was really hard work; at the time I had no DCs so I dread to think what it'd be like now I have one.

dhs mum became a teacher near the age of 50,she says its the best thing shes ever done!she bought up 5 kids and then when the youngest went to school she just did it.do it if its really what you want to do.Its not an easy job though and the money is rubbish for the amount of work/lack of respect you get!(im only getting that from dhs siblings who are married to teachers,and his mum,dad and stepdad were too)

only other thing i would say is that it can be difficult to actually get a job,my sister in law did her degree,got a temporary contract in the school she trained in and since hasnt found a job,she does telesales now!

If you are working and doing OU why should you have £30k student debt? You would get support for PGCE. It is not a bad idea if you really want it. I re qualified from one profession to another (including studying to Masters level in new role)when I was in my late 40s and as a voyage of exploration I found it most interesting and challenging. A lot of people in my sector get jaded and tired in their 40s but as I'm new to it all and don't remember "the golden age" the problem doesn't affect me.

I did some part time lecturing before my change of career, and although that is not the same as teaching I can tell you that all the unpaid preparation and some marking took me about twice as much time as the hours I was in the college getting paid, so it is not an easy ride.

higgle the OU have recently changed their fee structure so that it is way more expensive than it used to be and more in line with the figures you'd pay at a full-time conventional uni. If the OP is working then she's not likely to get much financial assistance from them apart from the chance to pay in instalments rather than a lump sum. Plus the bursary amounts for PGCE keep changing due to demand for different subjects and English tends to be a bit hit-and-miss in that respect.

I am a teacher and am often a bit at teachers saying that they work every moment of the weekends and holidays. It is a fact that the holidays are a major perk of the job and I like the fact that when ds is older I won't have to worry about childcare for much of the holidays.

Having said that, please do NOT go into teaching for the weekends and holidays. I never have a weekend or school holiday where I don't have something hanging over my head that I need to do, although I have learnt to get a better work life balance. I couldn't imagine doing a pgce now that I have a child although I know it can be done.

There is a he'll of a lot of bullshit going on in teaching at the moment and I think that the whole profession is quite demoralised (or whingy as those outside of education like to think). I do still love working with the kids, but I do get a sick feeling every time I walk into a staff meeting.

Good luck with your decision.

We could have weekends and school holidays free with the DC, the youngest of which is only 2 now and will be in the education system for the next 16 years and we will have another 15-20 years of working years left as well.

Although I applaud your enthusiasm and I hate to say this, I think you are dreaming. And unlike others, I am not so sure that you are not too old. Not because it's not possible to retrain at your age at all, but because of what is required in terms of stamina and out of hours work in this particular profession. We are talking about a job where you are standing all day, have to do as much admin paperwork as actual teaching if not more, calling and emailing parents, extra duties and where you have to do planning and marking in the evenings and the holidays. You simply won't have your weekends or your evenings entirely free again.

My DH is in his late 30s and has been teaching for nearly 10 years in secondary. He and his colleagues get to half-term by the straps of their boots in terms of exhaustion levels. You can tell it's half-term by how grey they all look. In his department alone, two people have developed stress-related conditions, and he's not even in a difficult school. He loves the teaching part but the admin and extra stuff is bringing him down a lot as it takes most of his time. And the constant governmental changes, criticism and undervaluation of teachers do significantly affect morale.

I second the last post. At 49 I no longer have the energy I had at 30 and am wiped out after a days work. Wiped out to the point I can't move. I just cannot imagine doing tis at 60. The thought.....

OK! Thanks for all the replies. Seems we may be nuts! I am thinking more along the lines of: I want to take an English degree as I will enjoy it, what can I do with it? The obvious answer is teaching. I don't want to do a degree unless it's going to enhance my earning power! I want to do something rewarding and long term. Of course the school holidays are attractive and at least we would be at home together even if there is lesson planning, marking to do.

Ideally I would love to work in a college or university and hopefully that may come later. I can't stand my own young children/teenager let alone anyone elses!!

DH currently works 60 hours a week including nights, weekends, late nights etc and his hours are bloody awful. I do not want him doing that into his 50's. That is why we discussed him doing it as well.

Hmm may have to rethink!

Thanks again for the valuable insight you have provided.

Sorry, if this has been suggested but is there any way you could do it part time once qualified? I have been teaching pt for about 10 years and it is absolutely fantastic. I do work at a brilliant school, very supportive and happy but I think I would die of exhaustion doing it full time now.